Face for the Radio
by WaterCoolerRomance
Summary: Isabella Swan had a face for the radio. HAD. Now, she's a much sought after model living in the centre of London. What happens when a blast from the past threatens to over turn her life? How will she react? AH E/B AU.
1. Chapter 1

'**Face for the Radio' by WaterCoolerRomance**

……**..**

You have a face for the radio,  
But I know you'd like to see it in a show,  
Claiming to be the next best everything,  
Which way will you go?

………**..**

"You can be whatever you want to be"

That's what she was always told and that was what she always believed. That was how she lived her life.

And why change that now? After all, it had gotten her this far hadn't it?

Thanks to those words of wisdom she was well on her way to the perfect life.

Well, that's what she let everyone think.

………**..**

"Where'd you like this, miss?" a middle aged man in overalls asked her from across the room as she stood at the window, surveying the street beneath her. In his hand he had the last box of her possessions. All day the workmen had been bringing in box after box of her things, they had moved all the furniture in the previous day and her new apartment was pretty much ready to be called 'home'. All it needed now was for her to make it her own.

"Over there's fine" she smiled sweetly, thanking him and resisting the urge to slap him when he smacked her rear. "Here's your pay" she said pointedly, showing him to the door and closing it forcefully in his face.

_Pervert. _She thought as she went to sit on her newly purchased sofa and stretched out, tired despite having not done much today, other than point and tell people where to leave things. Yawning, she kicked off her shoes and curled up on the sofa, more than happy to sleep there. She easily drifted off the sleep and was soon in her own little world.

Early the next morning, she was woken by the sound of her phone. Stumbling through her apartment she hunted down her bag and pulled out her phone, smiling slightly when she saw the caller ID.

"Hey, Jake" she smiled into the phone, stifling a yawn and going over to the kitchen, signing when she realised she hadn't unpacked.

"Hey, Bells." He greeted her, she could hear from his voice he was smiling and she found herself smiling at that, he was her own personal sun and she loved the way just his smile could make her happy. "So, how's my supermodel's new abode?" he laughed as se giggled, going over to a box marked with 'kitchen' and opening it up, pulling out the kettle and a mug.

"Good so far, I haven't done much though, in fact I slept the rest of yesterday and through the night. I never knew bossing workmen around could be so tiring!" she joked, smiling as his laugh filled her ears

They talked for a while longer, filling their time with meaningless talk and finally rang off when Bella's phone started to bleep.

"Sorry, my phone needs charging, I'm going to have to go" Bella told him, slightly saddened to be cutting their conversation short. "Tell Lauren I said hi" she giggled, hearing him groan at the hint of the rivalry his girlfriend apparently felt the need to create between Bella and herself. Lauren was convinced Bella was trying to steal Jacob off her and would get really uptight whenever they were alone together, she usually ended up inviting herself along to all social events so as to keep and eye on the pair. It aggravated Jacob no end, it simply amused Bella, who only found it annoying when Lauren made a scene, and their other friends found it simply hilarious. Everyone knew the idea of Bella and Jacob being anything more than just friends was ludicrous. Well, everybody except Lauren of course!

"See you soon, Bells" he signed "Take care"

"You too" she smiled down the phone before saying a final goodbye and ending the call. She went through to the small dining area where she had put all the boxes that held things she used regularly and took out her phone charger, plugged it into a socket in the kitchen and then set about making the cup of coffee she had intended to make earlier that morning.

After she had gotten her coffee fix and pulled on some clean jeans and a hoodie she set about unpacking. First, she went to the electrical box and pulled out her Ipod dock, grabbing her Ipod from her bag, whacking it into the dock and hitting shuffle, she smiled as 'Henrietta' by The Fratellis filled the room and then went skipping through to her bedroom to start unpacking the boxes that she had placed in there, tripping slightly as she went.

It had taken her next to no time to pack when she moved out of her old place; she didn't have time to waste and had thrown everything into boxes and decided to look through the things when she got to her new place. She had been on a tight time scale and had to get out of her rented apartment in a suburb of London as quickly as possible. Luckily, the past four years of modelling had brought her a fair amount of money and she decided it was time she invested in a property of her own, finding herself an apartment she loved and making it official. It was about time too, at 28 her parents were always nagging her to settle down. They were always telling her to find a nice man and settle down, start a family and all that jazz. But that wasn't for her, at least not at the moment. She had just ended things with her boyfriend, James, and was looking for a whole new start; she hoped that moving into the centre of London would provide that opportunity.

The doorbell rang about 5 hours after she had started unpacking and she untangled herself from the pair of curtains she was battling with in the living room, having unpacked in her bedroom, bathroom and dining room.

"Coming!" she yelled as she jumped down from the stool she had been standing on and running towards the door, suddenly in high spirits. However, her coordination did not quite agree with her high spirits and she tripped over a box that was in the hall, flying into the door, hitting her head and falling to the floor.

"Bella, dear?" Her mother, Renee's, voice drifted through the door "Are you okay, love?"

She sat up, rubbing her head and foot, glaring at the guilty box, huffing when it didn't react, staying in its box-like state. She stood up, and kicked the box in frustration before turning around and opening the door to her worried mother.

"Oh my, what on Earth did you do? That was quite a bang!" Renee fretted as Bella stepped aside to let her in, closing the door behind her.

"I'm fine mum, I just tripped is all" she smiled meekly, throwing a glare over to the guilty box and walking through to the kitchen, silently cursing the damned box for ruining her good mood.

Her mother nodded, seemingly appeased "Well, you always were clumsy"

The seriousness of her tone made Bella want to laugh and she turned around so as to hide her smile.

"Coffee?" she offered

"oh, no" her mother waved her off. Bella rose a carefully plucked brow at her

"Since when have you not drank coffee?" she inquired, smiling slightly. This must be another of her little fads.

"I'm on a strictly caffeine free diet." Her mother informed her, producing a carton of orange juice from her bag and placing it on the counter while Bella battled internally with her need to laugh. "Do you have a glass, love?"

"One sec" she nodded, going over to the box she had opened earlier and digging to the bottom, producing a glass and unwrapping it from its protective layers. "Here you go, one glass" she smiled, handing it over and going over to the just boiled kettle, pouring herself a drink and taking a sip, sighing in content.

They chatted idly for a while before migrating to the living room and making themselves comfy, launching into a new conversation.

"So, what happened between you and James? I heard from Angela you had broken up with him" she inquired as she took a sip of her orange juice. Bella tolled her eyes, her mother: always the gossip

"I wanted something new mum, I just wanted a new start here. James wasn't too keen on that idea and I didn't want him to hold be back." She told her mother, watching her frown and sighing internally; looks like her mother won't be giving up any time soon

"Oh, but he was a lovely man. I'm sure you could have talked him around" Renee seemed genuinely upset about the disappearance of James in Bella's life but it was just something she would have to get used to. She wasn't going into a relationship to appease her mother.

"Look, even if I hadn't moved or he had been okay with it we probably wouldn't have lasted much longer any way" Bella sighed, slumping back in her chair and hoping they would find something new to talk about soon.

"oh, but why on Earth not?" he mother asked, somewhat sulkily as she took the last sip of her orange, placing the empty cup on the coffee table

"We were never the perfect match, mum. We're too stubborn for our own good, we were always arguing."

"You weren't always arguing" Renee said quietly as her daughter sighed and stood up, picking up both their empty glasses and taking them through to the kitchen. Renee followed her, not wanting this to be the end of the conversation, after all, James had been lovely to her and whenever she had seen them they looked lovely together

"No, but I think I can safely say that arguing was the most eventful part of our relationship. He was boring mum, lovely and kind and sweet, but boring all the same. At first I thought he was great but do you know what? I realised I needed somebody with a little more fun in them. Face it, he wasn't for me"

Renee sighed one final time before letting the subject go with a carefully casual "Whatever makes you happy, dear" and kissed her daughters forehead lightly.

Renee took a look around the place for the first time then, apparently too engrossed in gossip to look around Bella's new abode earlier.

"Oh, what a lovely room" she gushed as she went into the main bedroom. It was a large, light room with a fireplace in the middle of the left wall and Bella's wooded bed stood against the opposing wall, looking slightly out of place in its new home.

"I think so" Bella said, grinning proudly "I'm not sure whether to keep the bed though; it was given to me by a friend who was getting rid of it when I moved into my old place. It's a bit tatty and it doesn't really go with the room. I'm not sure what to replace it with though" she mused, walking over to the window and looking down over her new garden. She sighed, pretty as it was it would take some looking after. Oh lovely, yet another job to squeeze into her hectic life.

"A lovely iron wrought bed, maybe?" Renee suggested, joining her by the window and taking in the pretty little garden, smiling slightly at the thought of something so picturesque being in the centre of London.

"Well, Bella, you sure have gotten yourself a nice little place" Renee said as she prepared herself to leave later that night. Bella nodded in agreement, looking around fondly. Renee said her goodbyes and promised to see her again the next day with some shopping Bella had asked her to bring along. She had only brought a little food with her when she moved and by tomorrow it would surely all be gone. Renee had offered to pick some stuff up for her and she gratefully accepted, giving her a list and some money.

Bella grabbed a bite to eat and then went into the second bedroom to unpack for a while before she headed off to bed. Although she had no furniture except a bookshelf from her previous apartment in the room she could see it being a lovely guest room/study. She planned to put a sofa bed in the far corner and a desk in the other, leaving the back wall for her bookshelves in which she would perch all her favourite books and some memories. She didn't want pictures all over the house but would still like to have some memories on show. She figured since she would probably be spending a fair amount of time in this room, what with her books being in here, she may as well make this the place for memories.

An hour later she had already unpacked three boxes of books and had moved on to unpack some of her photos. She placed a photo of her and her parents on one of the shelves followed by one of her and Jacob that had been taken last Christmas. She smiled at the picture; Jacob was wearing his signature smile and had his arm draped loosely around her shoulder. Jacob was like a brother to her, everybody knew that, and it was times like this, when she was looking back on days they had spent together, that she resented Lauren. Because of her and her jealousy, Jacob had been spending less time with her and now that she had moved they would, undoubtedly, be seeing even less of each other. Hopefully, he would come to his senses soon and dump the bitch. He could do so much better than her! Bella knew that one day he would some lucky girl extremely happy and she hoped him all the best. She also knew that lucky girl was not Lauren, by a long shot!

She sighed, placing the picture on the shelf and deciding to empty just one more box before going to bed. Although Bella was not one for collecting junk this box seemed to hold some rather meaningless possessions and most of the contents of the box ended up in a black bag, ready to give to charity. All, except an ancient copy of 'Pride and Prejudice', a mirror she thought she could make good use of in the bathroom and an old photo album had been put in the bag. She placed the book on the shelf with the others and took the mirror, photo album and bag of junk into the living room where she dropped the bag by the door, ready to take to the charity shop at some point in the week, and placed the album on the table while she went to put the mirror in the bathroom. She returned and made herself a cup of coffee, grabbing a blanket and the album and settled herself on the sofa.

She eagerly opened the album, looking over childhood memories, and smiled when she recognised the bronze haired boy in the first picture. A young Edward Cullen was smiling as he pushed an even younger Isabella Swan on the swing set she had received for her ninth birthday, the day this photo had been taken. Bella smiled as she looked over the photo, remembering the good old days when Edward had been her Edward. They both looked so happy in the photo, as if they hadn't a care in the world. Well, they hadn't. At nine and ten they were too busy playing together in her garden to care about what was going on in the world. They had been neighbours, their parent had been best friends, and they had grown up together, they were inseparable and were convinced they would be friends forever. She could see though, even in this picture from their early childhood, that they would not last, she could see the thing that would eventually split them up. She could see his good looks and her lack of them.

She had a face for the radio, as it were.

Funny how when she was growing up as a teenager, having lost her best friend and not a clue how to get him back, she had resented the superficial world that was beauty and fashion. As far as she was concerned then, that was what had split them up. He was gorgeous and fashionable, even from a young age, while she, as a child, had a face only a mother could love. She dressed like a blind hippie that had just been let loose on a charity shop and had a face full of spots. She was shy and geeky and he was completely the opposite. The 15 year old Bella blamed the superficial society for the loss of Edward from her life and she hated it with a passion.

Ironically, here she was; a much sought out model living in the heart of London, a fashion guru and she had a bigger makeup collection than anyone she knew!

At about the age of 18 she had 'grown into her looks', as her gran had put it, and her body had soon followed, all trace of baby fat and acne were nowhere to be seen. She got regular offers from attractive guys, asking to take her out to dinner, the movies etcetera, etcetera. She went to college, she got qualifications in English and was planning on becoming an English teacher but when she was out shopping one day she got spotted by a model scout. At the time she needed the money so took the job on as a temporary thing but soon, she realised that this was something she wanted to do for good. All the attention made her feel beautiful and she didn't want to trade that feeling in for anything else. Soon, she got where she was today; a much sought out model. And, although she sometimes felt like she was missing something, like there was a part of life she wasn't experiencing, she was happy, overall.

Taking another sip of her coffee, she turned the page, flicking through several childhood pictures of her and her family and the Cullen's. She smiled at old memories, remembering nights when they would have a barbeque or she would go over to Edwards and they would camp in the back garden. The innocence of childhood seemed a million years ago and Bella sometimes found herself wishing that she could go back to that, just for one day.

The last picture in the album was of her and Edward on her 13th birthday. He was 14, in the year above her in school, and he was really starting to turning into a man. She, however, was still chubby and had the beginnings of what would be several years of acne problems.

She held no bitterness though, not anymore. On hind sight, it would have probably have happened sooner or later, regardless of if Edward had ditched her for his popular friends. They were a year apart in school so they didn't see all too much of each other except for lunch and out of school hours. They didn't have all too much in common and, although they had made their friendship work as children, she doubted it would have lasted throughout adulthood. No, she wasn't bitter any more.

Last she had heard, he was in a band. They were small but they had been signed, that was for sure. Edward wrote all the music and played the guitar but he didn't sing, apparently, although she didn't know why; when they were growing up he had always had such a good singing voice. But whatever, she was happy for him. She had never heard this band but she had heard they were pretty good.

Hopefully, the opportunity to see him again some day would arise. She hadn't seen him since she was 17 and he was 18, when he had left Forks high. She hadn't talked to him since she was 15, though she had kept in contact with his parents. They called every now and then to see how she was but they never mentioned much of Edward, remembering how upset she had been after he had stopped talking to her.

She doubted he would recognise her, even if she did see him again; she wasn't exactly the ugly duckling she was as a child. Still, the probability of seeing him again was quite slim.

She yawned, stretching her hands above her head and closed the album, deciding it was time to go to bed. She washed her mug in the sink and then put the album on the bookshelf in the spare room and changed into her pyjamas. She washed her face and brushed her teeth, quickly tidying the bathroom and then going into her own room. She closed the curtains that she had battled to put up that morning and turned off the light, crawling into bed and closing her eyes for a well earned nights rest.

………**.**

"So, when're you going to be adding your own personal flair to this place?" Renee asked as they packed the groceries she had bought Bella away in the kitchen.

"I don't know to be honest" Bella answered uncertainly. No doubt her mother wanted to know whether she could help out of not. "It's quite nice like this, very neutral" she commented, looking at the white wash walls that echoed throughout the apartment. "Still, I think I'll put some colour on eventually"

"Eventually? Don't you want to get it over and done with?" Renee puzzled

"Well, I think I've earned a break from working in my spare time this week" Bella smiled, putting away the last of the food and beginning to make a coffee for her and her mother. "I'm really busy then for about a month though." She sighed, passing her mother her drink and going through to the living room so they could chat on the sofas.

"What've you got planned?" Renee asked, taking a sip of her coffee. Well, that caffeine free diet didn't last long did it?

"Well, Monday I've got an interview with a magazine about the last lot of work I did. Tuesday I need to go shopping with my stylist for a shoot I'm doing on Friday. Wednesday I've got to go and see somebody about having my portfolio updated; I want to add some stuff we did last month." She paused to take a sip of her coffee before continuing "Thursday I planned to get lunch with some friends and then I'm having a quiet evening. Friday's the shoot and then I've got the weekend off."

"Busy week" Renee muttered

"Tell me about it, I think that's pretty much my weeks planned out for a while now, though. I have several shoots to do for the same company I'm working with on Friday and they want me to be there as much as possible during the designing process."

Bella sighed one more time before she asked her mum about Phil, her new husband. After this tactful subject change on Bella's behalf they moved into more trivial conversations, talking light-heartedly and laughing and joking. After a few hours Renee left and Bella started making herself a lasagne for her tea. After eating she took a long, relaxing bath and carefully dried her hair. She went to bed early for once, still tired from the precious days work.

The place was nearly unpacked now; all that was left was the stuff she had to find a place for. She would have to buy a CD rack at some point and maybe another, small, bookshelf. She needed some more cooking utensils as hers were old and overused. She needed a new bed, wardrobe and bed side table as all three of these items looked out of place in her bedroom. She fell asleep contemplating what colour to paint each room, and had some good ideas about how to make this place feel like more of a home to her.

………**..**

**So, what'd you think? Just click that little button down there to tell me! I won't bite, promise! =P**

**Thanks for reading… =)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you to everyone who read, reviewed and added this story. =) It makes me happy.**

Monday morning Bella woke up slightly more tired than usual, it was as if the impending day of work had exhausted her already but, as she dragged herself out of bed, she reminded herself it was always like this when she went back to work. Usually, Monday was the biggest struggle of the week. She chose to live like an average girl at weekends, skipping the gym and eating a perhaps less balanced diet than she would on a normal day. By the time Monday rolled around she was exhausted fresh out of bed.

As she only had an interview scheduled for today she chose to give the gym a miss. After all, she really needed to ease myself into this, for the past week and a half she had been having a 'weekend' as it were. Bella made myself a coffee and then took the wheatabix out of the cupboard, putting two in a bowl and then emptying the remainders of the cherries she had started yesterday on top. I added some milk and crunched away as I thought about the day ahead.

It shouldn't be too strenuous, one interview, that was it. Bella had done this a thousand times before. It was some fashion magazine for teenagers today, nothing out of the ordinary. She decided to go for a more casual look today but not too casual; she didn't want to make people think she didn't care. Bella showered and dried her hair, curling it softly and then pulling it into a high pony tail. She pulled on some loose hipster light wash jeans and a shirt she had recently bought. She applied some simple makeup before giving herself a once over and, once satisfied, grabbing her things and heading out the house.

Arriving at the magazine's office early, she decided to have a look around. She said hello to the receptionist and then went into a large room filled with samples of previous photo shoots. She was amazed by what she saw; their photographers were clearly very creative and were good at what they did. They had managed to work wonders for people. She saw a familiar face and went to look, gasping when she noticed how different Helena looked once these photographers had worked their magic on her. Don't get her wrong, Helena was pretty normally but in this picture she looked utterly stunning!

"Wonderful aren't they?" A voice said from behind me, making Bella jump. She turned around to see a tall, slim, perfectly toned woman of about 30 smiling at me. Bella smiled back, holding her hand out in introduction. She took it gratefully, introducing herself as May. Bella looked back at the wall and then answered her question

"Oh, yes" she replied, walking over to the display furthest away from them "They sure know how to flatter people" she mused, looking over yet another familiar face that had been greatly altered.

"We employ only the greatest" May replied. Bella smiled back kindly, nodded in agreement. They certainly did that. "Now, Miss Swan" she started,

"Bella" she interrupted, smiling kindly at her and waiting for her to continue.

"Of course, Bella" May smiled back, she took Bella's hand and started to walk towards the door, taking Bella with her "Would you like to begin your interview now or would you like to grab a bite to eat first?" she asked. May smiled encouragingly at her, as if urging Bella to grab something to eat with her before the interview started but she wasn't convinced. As lovely as she seemed Bella couldn't shake the feeling that something was just a little too fake. She had a feeling that May was not the type of person she would appreciate socialising with, and didn't fancy testing that hypothesis with an awkward brunch in a cosmopolitan bar in the middle of London.

"Well, you see I have to be somewhere later so I'm on a bit of a tight time scale" Bella lied, hoping May wouldn't see through her pretence. May looked slightly disappointed for a second before a look of appeasement appeared on her face once again and she smiled at Bella, leading her off into a little office at the far end of the corridor.

"No worries, I'm sure you have a very hectic lifestyle" she said, rummaging around her desk. May produced a recording device and a notebook covered in scrawls and set them on her desk. She offered Bella a glass of water which she took gingerly, making sure to not spill anything over May's nice, shiny office. May set up her stuff and pressed record, smiling at Bella again reassuringly before turning to her page of notes.

"Now, Bella" she started "I've made a list of possible questions, some are from the readers and some are from the staff that work here. I would appreciate if you would answer them but you may also refuse to answer a question you are not comfortable with being published" she took Bella through the procedures that were already second nature to her and she smiled and nodded, agreeing to the terms and then signalled for her to begin.

"Okay, first off" she said, pulling on her glasses and looking down "Caitlyn from Surrey would like to know how you get your hair to look so good, even in a simple style"

Bella laughed nervously; as much as she liked doing this kind of thing sometimes she really hated it. She didn't like the thought of people idolising her and wanting to be her, wanting to know how she does certain things and information about certain aspects of her life. For Bella, that wasn't what modelling was about. It was about being individual and feeling beautiful being individual. What's more, she wanted to encourage other people to be individual. That didn't mean she wanted them to think of her as some kind of goddess, forever hanging off her every word. Maybe they wouldn't even be her words, maybe when May writes this interview up she would change Bella's wording to manipulate what she had said. Who knows?

Bella answered all the same though, giving details on how she took care of her hair and always tried to treat it how her hair stylist advised. Stay away from the constant use of heat, don't use too many products at once etc. It was all very dull if you asked her, very average. Any goon with half an idea about hair could tell you that constantly frying your hair with straightening irons or curlers would affect it.

There was a string of questions about her beauty regime, her fitness regime, her diet etc. It was very uneventful in truth. She sat and explained aspects of her life to, indirectly, the readers of a teenage magazine who taught that beauty was the most important thing. She didn't know why she always took such a pessimistic view of the world as, with her job, she was essentially quite materialistic herself. Although she thought it was something to do with people, celebrities and magazine, such as this one, taking the depth out of people, encouraging them to believe beauty _is _life. In an ideal world looks wouldn't matter but, as Bella knew, this wasn't an ideal world and she knew that looks did matter very much in the current image-obsessed cultures of the world but the she also knew was that there was more to life than it. She agreed it was right to help people out a little bit, to give them advice on how to feel and look good but when a line between advice and attempted brainwash is crosses something needs to be done.

Eventually, it came to the questions that were set my the members of staff that worked for the magazine. She knew that they would be less interested in the glamour side of her life as all that had been covered.

"So, there haven't been any recent pictures of yourself and your partner, James, in the press recently, I was wondering why that was" May said casually, although she had just declared that the interview was over she had blatantly not turned off her recording equipment, perhaps in a bid to get some information out of Bella. Maybe May had hoped she had forgotten about it as she was currently feigning to have.

"Yes, well. We're not seeing each other any more" Bella told her, getting up to leave, making it evident that the subject was not up for discussion. May did not get the hint though as she followed her lead, pursuing the subject Bella had not so tactfully tried to shove aside.

"Why on earth not?" she asked, feigning shock. As if they hadn't been demising this for the past week or so!

"I don't really think that has much to do with the public" Bella said coolly before shrugging on her coat and walking towards the door

"Of course not, just between you and me" she assured me, smiling flakily

"Oh yes, you, me and that little tape recorder over there? I don't think so. Not up for discussion I'm afraid" She replied, trying to keep all annoyance out of her voice. She would not confide in the public her reasons for ending her relationship with James. She would leave him with his pride.

With one last fleeting smile she walked out of the office, through reception and to her car. Once inside she sighed heavily in relief. _Finally_ she thought _It's over._

With only half of the day wasted she headed home and made herself lunch, she then grabbed her phone and called a few friends.

……**.**

"Hello?" Helena said down the phone

"Hey, Helena, it's Bella" Bella replied, plonking herself down on the sofa and inspecting her nails. She would have to have them manicured before the shoot, drat. She hated doing that, it was always such a long, fussy process and completely pointless if you asked her. Who paid attention to her nails anyway?

"Oh! Hello Bella, how've you been?" she asked formally.

"Fine thank you, how about you?" she asked, mirroring her formality. To be perfectly honest, Bella was a little uncomfortable with all the formality Helena seemed to insist on putting between them when they spoke on the phone; she was usually much more relaxed when they were speaking face to face. Strange how somebody can alter so much with such a little thing, isn't it? It made Bella feel as if Helena were putting on an act whenever they spoke on the phone, or in the presence of anyone Helena thought could help her along in the world.

On the other side of the phone Helena walked around her living room, a small watering can in one hand and a duster in the other. She was balancing her phone between her chin and her shoulder, her neck would surely soon hurt from its precarious position and she knew she would be forced to remove it soon.

"Oh, I'm fine" she assured her friend, carefully watering the amaryllis in the corner of her living room, smiling at the beautiful yellow flowers it bared. She then began to dust the surface of a near by table, listening to Bella as she relayed details of her day so far. She listened eagerly as Bella spoke of her annoyance at the woman who had interviewed her. Bella was very passionate about her work, Helena knew that much. She had only gotten into this business because she needed the money as a lowly student but she knew that Bella had grown to love the business. Her views were very refreshing, thought Helena, she wasn't superficial or materialistic she was actually a very intellectual person who enjoyed the simplest of things.

"I was wondering if you wanted to catch a bite to eat?" Bella asked after having talked to Helena for a while "I've already called Jasmine and Connor; they've agreed to meet me at about 5 at 'Vivo's' in town, you up for it?"

"Of course" Helena replied, putting down the watering can and duster and taking the phone from between her chin and shoulder to hold it against her ear. "I'll see you then" she bid goodbye to Bella and hung up, looking around her light, airy flat for any areas in need of a little spring clean and, once satisfied that her flat was spic and span, she retired to her bedroom to dress for the evenings events, eager to see her friends.

……

"I was wondering when you'd get here" Connor called from the bar as Bella entered the restaurant. She smiled apologetically and walked over to him, ordering a drink from the waiting barman and then turning to face him.

Connor was a tall, lean, tanned man. Good looking and intellectual. If Bella was honest with herself, if she was interested in any kind of relationship right now she would probably want to be with Connor. He was fun to be around; he always made her laugh and managed to cheer her up when she was down. Apart from Jacob, he was probably one of her closest male friends. He had a killer dress sense as well, a little scene perhaps but he pulled it off very well. Today, he wore a black and white striped V-neck with a black waistcoat over it. He had black skinny jeans on with a studded belt hanging loose and un-useful. He topped this all off with a trilby hat, slightly angled atop his head.

"Sorry, my mum called round and I just couldn't get rid of her!" Bella chuckled "She was going on and on about this new pottery class she's enrolled in and she just wouldn't shut up! Every time I tried to say I needed to be somewhere she would cut me off and talk about it a little more"

Connor chuckled lightly, having met Renee he knew very well how childlike she was and no longer blamed Bella for being late. However childlike she was though, he could not deny she was harmless, a lovely woman who cared deeply for others, she just tended to get a little carried away sometimes. "Pottery, hey?" he mused "I didn't have her down for the pottery type of girl" Bella laughed and he smiled

The barman handed Bella her drink and she paid him courteously, tactfully ignoring the number that had been scrawled across the top of the receipt and leading Connor to a near by table, set for four.

"I know what you mean" she said after they were seated "I didn't think so either, then again I didn't think she was the yoga type either but she kept at the for about four years"

"Well," Connor said, looking over at the entrance as Jasmine and Helena pushed through the door "I think you will be forgiven, apparently the girls are nothing but fashionably late" he chuckled as they waved at us, striding towards the bar and ordering their drinks, Jasmine flirting slightly with the barman who seemed to have gotten over Bella's rejection.

After getting their drinks they joined Connor and Bella at the table, greeting the pair as they sat.

Jasmine was a tall, slender woman with a face many would kill for. She was the perfect example of 'traditional beauty'. She wore very striking makeup often, today she wore electric blue eyeliner with a contrasting eye shadow while she toned it down a little with nude lips. On many, this may look utterly ludicrous but somehow Jasmine managed to pull it off, to the envy of many of her friends. She wore a dress to match her eyeliner and killer heals.

Helena had striking green eyes and flaming red hair that cascaded down her back in gentle curls. She wore a short black dress which hugged her figure perfectly and only very natural makeup.

Bella herself wore a midnight blue dress that she had purchased a few weeks previously, her lids were lightly outlined and she wore mainly natural makeup.

All four of them were attracting much attention from fellow diners but none noticed, they were so accustomed to the attention of people that it no longer bothered them when they were stared at in public. However, they were always grateful for any compliment they received. They were all very grounded people, despite their status. Maybe that was what made them get along so well? They were all very grounded and very much realists. They took little for granted and treated people as they expected them to treat them.

"So, how'd the shoot go?" Connor asked Helena after they had eaten. Usually, they talked little of their work when out socially, they had many opportunities to do so when they worked as they often worked very closely together. All being under the same management, their manager would send several of them down whenever somebody wanted a group. However, Helena had been excited about a shoot she had been offered to do with the same magazine Bella had had an interview with that day, saying it would hopefully get her a little bit better known and maybe a little more sought after.

"Oh, fine" she smiled, seeming genuinely pleased. "Their photographers are very talented, very creative."

"Oh, yes" Bella agreed "I saw some of their work today. They certainly know what they're doing. Actually," she said to Helena "I saw a photo from your shoot up on one of the new displays."

"Really?" Helena squeaked excitedly "they put it on display?"

Bella nodded, taking a sip of her drink before continuing "They have an entire room dedicated to the work of their photographers."

"And they're as good as everyone seems to think?" Connor enquired

"Yes, I've been wondering that" Jasmine put in "There's been a lot of hype about them recently and I wandered if they would actually live up to their reputations"

"Oh, yes. They really can work wonders." She looked over to Helena "You look utterly stunning in the photo they took of you, they got the light just right and the background is such a contrast to yourself, it's genius"

They continued to talk about work for a while longer before Jasmine and Helena declared they were leaving. They bid goodbye to the others before leaving. Bella and Connor stayed and talked for only another half an hour before they decided to call it a night.

"I'll get it" Connor said as Bella reached for her purse when the waiter brought the bill to the table shortly before their departure.

"oh, no. it's okay" she assured him, pouting when he shoved his credit card under the waiters nose and telling him to step on it jokily.

He simply laughed as she sulked. He gave her a lift home as he didn't want her to get a cab this time of night alone. He was very protective of her. He knew she didn't see herself as vulnerable but thought of her as just that. She was a lovely girl, intellectual, talented and absolutely beautiful; the thought of her getting hurt upset him. She was a dear friend to him and he would quite like the opportunity to make her more than just a friend but knew she was not interested in relationships at the moment so never pushed the subject, choosing to keep her ignorant of his admiration.

Once they reached her apartment she was eager to show off her new abode, asking him to come up and see what it was like.

"Oh, please?" she asked

"I don't know, I'm kind of tired" he said, yawning. If he went up and left, say an hour later, he would surely be even more tired and he didn't think he should drive if he was so tired.

"You can crash up there, spare room now, remember?" she offered, pouting as he contemplated

"No clothes" he shrugged, grinning as she sulked

"You can go home and change! _Please?" _she pouted a little more and Connor found himself unable to resist.

"Fine" he sighed, exasperated. He pulled the key out of the ignition and got out of the car, following the now happy Bella up the stairs to her apartment.

……

Bella went through to the guest room and handed Connor a cup of coffee to help wake him up. He smiled gratefully and pulled himself out of bed, following her through to the kitchen.

He had to admit that his place was very nice. It was very Bella. Simple, yet homely.

She cooked them breakfast and they talked as they ate, mainly about unimportant matters. He changed back into his clothes and handed Bella the shirt she had lent him to sleep in, an old one of James's that he had let her keep once they had split up. She slept in it sometimes as it was warm and cosy, perfect for cold nights. He hugged her goodbye and headed out the door, getting into his car and starting towards his apartment to get changed.

It was about 7 in the morning and Bella had to meet her stylist in a café on Cambridge Street at 11 to begin shopping for an upcoming shoot. It was with a reasonably well known magazine and they wanted some shots of her sporting her own clothes. Supposedly they would find something similar and more affordable and put it in the magazine for younger girls to copy. _Oh well _thought Bella, _if that's what makes them feel good about themselves then that's the main thing, even if it was the wrong way to be advising them. _Bella had tried and tried again with many different magazines she had worked with to try and get them to print advice on how to come up with your own style and work with it from there but instead they insisted on advertising clothes to make children look like clones of the models they idolised. _They're missing the point _Bella thought to herself but she let it go, knowing she would get nowhere getting angry about it as, as far as she could tell, nothing was going to change anytime soon.

She decided to go to the gym for a hour, she may as well get back into the routine. She dressed in some sweat pants and a baggy shirt and headed out the door, catching the next bus to the local gym. She worked out steadily for the next 45 minutes before heading towards the showers and freshening up, not wanting to smell of sweat on her way home.

Once she got home she pulled on some jeans and a top and did her hair and makeup. It was another casual day today. She pulled on some trainers, not wanting to have to put up with blisters after shopping all day.

She sat and read for a while before grabbing her coat and heading out the door, catching a bus into the city centre and walking to the café.

"Bella!" a tiny, pixie like woman greeted her as she bought herself a coffee and plonked herself down next to her.

"Hey, Alice" she said, taking a sip.

"You know you need to cut down on all of that caffeine" Alice told her, disapprovingly. Bella simply rolled her eyes, earning herself yet another scowl from Alice.

Alice Brandon was one of the best stylists in the country, she was extremely lucky to have her. Although Bella's taste in clothes had improved dramatically she was still very much in need of Alice. Although Bella knew what was in style and what was not and how you should wear certain things and how you should not wear others these were very basic skills. Alice, however, could go into a shop and come up with something entirely different from what was in style then and make every outfit stunning. She knew exactly what to do to make somebody look gorgeous and Bella valued both her opinion and her friendship very much.

"So, what are we looking for today?" Bella asked after they had left the café

"Well, I think this is quite a casual shoot" Alice began "The magazine is set to become quite big and we need to make an impression so they want you to come back sometime, the more business the better" she laughed, linking arms with me as we walked through the crowded high street of London "They're quite into the 'scene' side of fashion so I'm thinking we go for something that'll make your head turn in the street without being too 'in your face' and formal. Right?" she asked for my approval.

"Anything you say, captain" I nodded, giggling as she raised an eyebrow at me.

"I have a friend who I contacted a few weeks ago when you got this shoot, he's designed some original designs for us. I think you'll look great" she encouraged, pushing me through some familiar doors.

…**..**

**Your thoughts?**

**That little green button down there is so tempting to push… =P**


	3. Chapter 3

**TY to anyone who reviewed or added the last chapter, it made me happy =)**

**It was brought to my attention that I had referred to Bella in first person a few times in the last chapter. Sorry about that, I have now edited and reposted that chapter. **

……**.**

"How about this one?" Alice called to Bella from across the room. Bella, who was looking at the shoes, looked over to see Alice holding a shocking blue dress. It was strapless and about knee length, it synched in at the waist but the skirt of the dress was very loose and poofed out a little.

"Hmm" Bella said, eyeing it and trying to imagine herself wearing it. "It's definitely nice, I just don't know how well I can pull it off"

"You'll look lovely in it, Bella" Alice reassured her, pushing her towards the dressing room "Just try it on and you'll know what I mean"

"I thought you said you wanted this shoot to be casual?" Bella challenged, raising an eyebrow at Alice

Alice simply shrugged "I never said it was for the shoot did I?" Bella glared at her "Hey, we have room for it in this month's budget!" she defended "We only spent about half of what we had budgeted for last month and even less the month before"

"That's because I think I own just about all the clothes in world!" Bella challenged, giving in and taking the dress into the changing room "I wish you would let me reuse some of the clothes I wear to shoots" she moaned through the curtain "Some of the stuff is really nice but I only get to wear them once and that's it, I have so many clothes that I couldn't wear on a day to day basis so why don't I make use of them?"

"Because, Bella, that stuff is old. It's out of fashion" Alice sighed, didn't they go through this every time they went shopping? She heard Bella sigh from behind the curtain and rolled her eyes, she was a drama queen sometimes. "Have you got it on yet?" she asked, beginning to get impatient.

"Nearly" Bella replied "I can't reach the zip"

Alice sighed and pulled the curtain aside, pulling up the zip and then dragging Bella out of the dressing room to stand in front of the mirror. Alice stood, admiring her handy work as Bella twirled and turned, admiring the dress from each angle. She could tell by the look on Bella's face that she loved it. _Great _Alice thought _nearly there_. She knew now all she had to do to get Bella to buy it was compliment her a little and the dress would be in a bag before you could blink.

She stepped up to the platform next to Bella "Wow that looks better than I thought it would" she squeaked in excitement "I thought it'd look great on you but I was wrong, it look _amazing _on you" she smiled at Bella as she blushed. It made Alice laugh how Bella could blush when receiving a compliment like that, she was, after all, a model. "It fits perfectly" Alice observed

"It does look pretty good doesn't it?" Bella mused, turning to look at the back once again "You sure we have enough for it?" she asked

"One hundred percent" Alice nodded, smiling as Bella nodded and went back into the changing room. She appeared five minutes later, holding the dress and fully clothed. She handed the cashier the dress and got out her card, ready to pay.

"Yay!" Alice chimed as they left the shop with the dress in a bag. Bella rolled her eyes; she should've known she would gloat. But Bella had to admit; it was a lovely dress and made her look damn good.

They shopped for the next four hours, until their feet were too painful to do anymore. They had bought plenty of clothes to last for the next few shoots she had planned. They headed back to Bella's place and packed away their purchases. Bella managed to convince Alice to help her go through her wardrobe and help her sort out the unneeded things. They got rid of everything they knew they would not need, coats, dresses, shirts, jeans, all of which were in a brilliant condition after only have being worn about twice. They put it all into a bin liner and Bella set it down in the hallway ready to take it down to the nearest charity shop the next day. Admittedly, it was a little expensive to just give away but it was completely useless to her now, especially with Alice as her stylist, and this way it would be some use to people, both the people who buy it and the charity. It was how she got rid of all her unwanted clothes, it made her feel less guilty about having so much and using so little.

After they were finished, Bella made something for them both to eat and they sat around the TV and watched "Drop Dead Fred", a personal favourite of Bella's. Bella laughed her way through the film while Alice made disapproving comments about each characters atrocious fashion sense.

"How are things with you and Jasper then?" Bella asked after the film had ended. Jasper and Alice had met about 4 months ago and, as far as she could see, they were a great couple. Jasper had made Alice unbelievably happy so far and she had a hunch they might be together for a very long time.

Alice smiled before answering "great" she said, still grinning "I'm going to meet his family next weekend"

"Really?" Bella asked, slightly surprised. His parents lived a long way away so for him to take her there things must me quite serious. "Are you nervous?" Bella asked, knowing full well from Jasper's descriptions that they were pretty strict.

"I was" she replied "But then Jasper said he doesn't care whether they like me or not so now I'm okay" she shrugged "I thought maybe if they hated me he would get put off but now I know he won't it doesn't bother me as much. Obviously, I want them to like me but if they don't then it's not like Jasper and I can't be together"

_How sweet _Bella thought to herself as she got up to put the dishes in the sink in the kitchen. She was glad Alice had finally found somebody who made her this happy. Alice was two years older than herself and she knew her history of men wasn't promising; many had used her or treated her badly. Alice deserved somebody with a heart of gold, not some floozy who was only with her for the action. Bella was actually surprised at how well Jasper and Alice worked; Alice was always so energetic and zealous whereas Jasper was very much the opposite; calm and collected.

"Some of his friends from college are coming over tomorrow, they're staying with us until Friday. You should come over at some point" Alice offered. Typical, she was always trying to hook Bella up with somebody.

"Maybe" Bella replied, not wanting to make any promises. Alice shrugged and continued her assault.

"What about you?" Alice inquired as she followed her through to the kitchen "Anybody I should know about in your life?"

Bella laughed "Nope, I'm all on my lonesome" she replied, running the water and adding some washing up liquid

"You wouldn't be if you actually put yourself out there" Alice countered "You know very well that you're the reason you're single"

Bella said nothing, Alice was right, she did know that and, although she got tired of being single again she just wasn't in the right place for a relationship yet. She didn't want to have to depend on somebody again and she didn't want to get involved with somebody and then realise they're not everything she thought they were, like she did with James.

"What about Connor?" Alice asked, earning a laugh from Bella "What's wrong with Connor? I was under the impression that you quite liked him" Alice sulked

"He's okay" Bella replied nonchalantly, trying to get out of this predicament unscathed, she knew if Alice found out she would want to be with him if she wanted to be in a relationship she would never hear the end of it. Alice would do everything in her power to get the pair together, and there is no stopping Alice sometimes.

"He likes you y'know" Alice said equally as nonchalantly, playing Bella's little game.

Bella's head shot up, "No, he doesn't, he thinks of me as a friend, nothing more"

"No" Alice countered "he really likes you but knows you don't want a relationship – which, by the way is crap because I think you do, you're just too afraid of putting yourself out there – so he's trying to keep it to himself so you don't feel uncomfortable around him." She smiled in satisfaction as Bella furrowed her brow, taking in the information

"Whatever" Bella said finally "We're friends, okay? Maybe we would be more if I wanted anything like that but, no. Not now"

Alice shrugged, letting it go and changed the subject to one a little less trivial. She stayed and chatted with Bella for another hour before looking at the clock and declaring she has to go home.

"I have an early start in the morning" she said, hugging Bella slightly before grabbing her coat. Bella bid her goodbye and waved her off before tidying up quickly and having a bath. She climbed into bed thinking about what Alice had said. Is it true? Is she really the reason she's unhappy? She shook her head, trying to rid all thoughts of relationships and Connor. This was not what she needed right now.

………**..**

The next morning she went to the gym as normal, doing pretty much the same as they day before. She went into town but in stead of shopping she went to see a woman about her portfolio; she needed to update it and wanted it to be done professionally. She briefed the woman on the new design and layout she wanted, handing her all the photos she wanted in it, various shots of her both on her own and in groups. Once that was over she left the woman to it, saying she would pick it up on Thursday. She went to the supermarket and bought some food then returned home to pack things away. By this time it was mid afternoon and she was not in the mood to go out after the busy day she had yesterday. She snuggled up on the sofa with a book and read all afternoon. She made herself a light dinner before having a long soak in the bath and an early night.

………

"So you'll be coming tonight, then?" Alice begged down the phone

Bella sighed; this was not a battle she would win. "Yes"

"Yay!" Alice squealed down the phone "wear that dress we bought the other day! Meet us at seven at the Casa Luna restaurant, y'know the one on Burke Avenue?" Bella replied, _yes, _and listened to Alice's detailed instructions on how to do her makeup and hair, adding in the occasional 'yes' and the occasional 'no'. "And don't over do it with the makeup, the colour of the dress is very overpowering, I don't think it would look right if you had very bold makeup on. Subtle is good" she said finally.

"okay" Bella sighed one last time. It wasn't that she was ungrateful to have been invited, she was actually very happy to be spending the night with friends, but she just wasn't in the mood for match making. "Anything else you want to _advise _me on, Alice?" she teased

"Yes, bring Connor" she said simply.

Bella rolled her eyes "I thought you were trying to hook me up with some of Jasper's friends, how will me bringing a 'date' help things?"

Alice paused, _ha, _thought Bella _that one's got her_

"it won't. I've decided not to hook you up with one of them. They live very far away. Long distance relationships never work"

Bella sighed, finally agreeing. After all, it didn't have to be a _date _with Connor, it could just be a friendly thing, it _will _be just a friendly thing.

She hung up the phone as Alice squealed with glee. Rolling her eyes, she dialled Connor's number

"Hello?" he answered, his tone sounding bored

"Hey, Connor"

"Oh, hey" he said, slightly more perky than he had been when he answered. Strange, maybe Alice was right? Or, maybe not.

"You up to anything tonight?" she asked him

"Nope, I was just going to sit and watch some crappy documentary on the rainforests, yawn."

She giggled, "Well, do you think maybe you would like to _not _watch that?"

"Sounds good to me" he said down the phone, the smiled evident in his voice "What'll I be doing instead?"

"Alice is throwing a party; she wants you to come with me"

"Alice wants me to go with you?" he asked sceptically

"Well, it was her idea but I want you there too"

"Oh, okay. I guess I can deal with that" he laughed "Where?"

"Casa Luna at seven"

"I'll pick you up at half six"

"Thank you" Bella said down the phone, grateful that she didn't have to catch the bus "and thanks for coming with me, I think being in a room full of Jasper's old college friends would have gotten a little tiring after a while" she laughed.

"No problem, Bells. See you later"

She bid him goodbye before hanging up, smiling despite herself.

She looked at the clock; 12:30. She had an hour before she had to meet up with Jacob and, no doubt, Lauren. She changed into something a little more interesting, not wanting to be the target of Lauren's jokes. Because Bella was a model, whenever Lauren saw her wearing something casual she would take the rip out of her. Anything to put Bella down so that she feels better about herself.

She caught the bus into the centre of London and then went into a near by café, the one she was supposed to meet Jake in.

She got herself a drink and sat for about 5 minutes before Jacob got there, surprising alone.

"Hey" he hugged her before sitting down.

"Hey" she responded, smiling at him. "Missed you"

"You too, Bella" he replied

"Where's Lauren?" She asked, taking a sip of her drink. She didn't miss the eye roll he put in before answering

"Home"

"Are you guys okay?" she asked, slightly worried. She didn't like Lauren but she didn't want Jacob to be miserable

"Not really" he admitted, fiddling with her mug, looking at the table "We've been arguing a lot recently"

Bella took his hand sympathetically "About what?"

"A load of stuff really, I think it's because I'm not letting her get away with all her snide remarks." Jake looked at her and smiled weakly "It really bugs me when she makes all these remarks about people when she doesn't know anything about them. I guess I've just reached the end of my tether."

"And she's not happy about that?"

"Nope. A few weeks ago she said something about this poor old woman who got on the same bus as us. The woman heard and she looked so hurt, I got really angry and wouldn't talk to Lauren. When we got home she asked me what was wrong and I totally flipped."

"What did you say?"

"I told her she could be a bitch sometimes and then stormed out the house"

"Oh" Bella said, not really sure how to reply. She was glad Jacob was finally expressing his views when it came to Lauren but she hated seeing him this miserable.

"Ever since then she's been worse than ever, with me especially. She's forever making little comments about me, about you, about everyone. It's driving me crazy. I don't know how much more I can take" he bowed his head in defeat and I moved closer to him to give him a hug.

After he had calmed down he got himself a coffee and went back to sit with Bella "What do you think I should do?"

Bella considered, what _did _she think he should do? Should he give up? Was she worth this?

"Do you love her?"

"I thought I did" he replied, looking out of the window "Now I'm not so sure"

Bella looked at the table "I think you have your answer" she said quietly. He looked down at the table for a second before nodding sadly

"It would probably be for the best" he said, Bella hugged him tightly for a while until he pulled away.

"Thanks Bella, you're the best" he smiled at her.

"No problem" she grinned back before getting up "Cake?"

"Go on then" he grinned, grateful she knew his weaknesses, Cake always made him happy.

She got her purse and headed towards the counter, ordering Jake's favourite cake and heading back to the table.

"Bella!" She heard someone calling from the doorway as she went back to sit down. She turned to the door and saw Leah, a girl she had met last month at a shoot.

"Hey!" she called, gesturing for her to come over. She came to their table and said hi to Bella and Jacob, staring slightly at Jacob Bella noticed. "You want to join us?" Bella offered "Jake will probably eat half of this cake but there will plenty left that I won't eat"

Leah agreed and sat down with them, conversation flowing freely between the three. However, Bella noticed that Leah and Jacob were paying a little more attention to each other than they were her. She smiled to herself. Leah was very pretty, she had lovely black hair and russet skin.

Soon, it was time for Bella to leave and she bid goodbye to the others but left rather unnoticed as they were both so absorbed in each other. Sweet.

She got the bus home and began to get ready for the night ahead, she let her hair fall freely down her back in soft waves and she did her makeup naturally, as suggested. The doorbell rang just as she pulled the dress on. She went to the door, battling with the zip.

Connor stepped in, dressed in a purple knitted jumped with a black and white scarf tied around his neck. He wore black jeans and black trainers. His dark brown hair was a disarray of extreme, yet soft, spikes. How he pulled this off she would never know.

"Need a little help?" he laughed as he saw her battling with her dress.

"Please" she said sheepishly. He pulled the zip up and squeezed her shoulders in reassurance.

"You look great" he told her, laughing as she blushed slightly.

She pulled on her heals and put on a chain necklace before grabbing a little black purse and declaring she was ready. They went down to Connor's car and were outside the Casa Luna in no time. They went into the restaurant, talking and laughing, both looking forward to whatever the night held.

………

**FYI, B/E will happen, just maybe not straight away. It would be a little dull if everything went smoothly, right? So, I'm adding a little drama. =)**

**A little shorter than the other two but I had to end it somewhere, it was either there or in about 4 pages so here you are… =) Unless you like cliff hangers? =P**

**Leave a thought?**


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks to anyone who read, reviewed and added this story so far. =)**

"Connor, Bella!" Alice called from a large table across the room. They smiled at her and waved to Jasper, they signalled that they would get a drink from the bar before joining them; Alice nodded and returned her attention to the people at the table. The table was full of unfamiliar faces; Bella could see the back of 3 people who were sitting next to the only spare seats, presumably Connor's and her own. Opposite was Alice and Jasper with 3 more unfamiliar people.

"I didn't think there were that many of them" Bella said after she had ordered and was waiting for her drink

"Where're they staying?" Connor enquired, looking over at the table. _It's full of men _he observed, taking in the faces of all the newcomers. _What if Bella takes a liking to one of them? _He wondered. He thought about it for a moment before coming to the conclusion he would let it happen. If Bella found happiness with another prick like James he would be happy for her. Well, at least that's what he would let her think.

"Connor?" Bella repeated, bringing him out of his thoughts

"Yeah? Sorry, I was miles away" he laughed, somewhat nervously.

"You okay?" she asked, taking a sip from the drink she had just been handed. She hadn't missed the nervousness in his voice.

"Yeah" he replied, taking a sip of his own drink and walking casually towards the table. "Are you going to be uncomfortable or anything?" he asked quietly.

"Why would I be uncomfortable?" she asked, puzzled_. What_ _a strange thing for him to say._ _He's normally so confident, what on earth has gotten into him_? She thought.

"Well, y'know. You and Alice are the only women, does that not bother you?"

She laughed slightly "Connor, I am not intimidated by men. I have been around men before you know." She took his arm reassuringly "It'll be fine. Relax; we'll have a great time"

He nodded slightly and took a swig of larger from his glass.

Alice saw them heading over, Bella with her arm linking in his and squealed with excitement. _My plan is coming together! _She thought. She liked nothing more than a good challenge and to her, getting her best friends together was a right cracker.

Then neared the table and said hi to everyone, placing their glasses down on the table and taking their seats.

"Everyone," Alice announced "this is Bella and Connor" she gestured to them in turn, as if doubting the boys' ability to figure out Bella was, in fact, he female and Connor the male. They both smiled at everyone, Connor unusually nervous. "Bella and Connor, this is everyone"

They each took it turn to introduce themselves. On the left of Bella was Ben, a man of average height with black hair and brown eyes. Next to him was Brady, he was tall and had dark, russet skin to match his dark hair. Next was Emmett, he was massive, easily a rugby player. He was pale with curly brown hair. Next to Alice and Jasper were Eric, with black hair and brown eyes, and Tyler, with brown hair and brown eyes. Next to them was an empty seat.

"I swear I saw somebody else" Connor said to Bella quietly once all the introductions were over and everyone was resuming their conversations.

"You did" Bella replied, matching his quiet tone. "They'll be back, I expect" She shrugged her shoulders and took another sip of her drink. Why had she opted for the smallest size? Of course, she was trying to cut down. But this tiny excuse for a drink would not do, she would return to the bar to get a soft drink when she had finished, she decided.

She started talking with Ben who, she found, was interesting in a way that one would not expect. Connor watched from the corner of his eye as Bella laughed at his jokes and talked to him, jealousy clouding his thoughts slightly.

"I'm going to get another drink" Bella said shortly after, getting up and assuring Connor she would be okay to go alone. She headed over to the bar and ordered a drink of Lemonade. She looked back at the table to see the back of a man's head who was heading towards their table. She recognised the hair at once; it was such a striking shade of bronze. It was the man that had been there when they had arrived. How strange that he had been so long in the toilets. She turned back to the bar to see the barman she had ordered her drink from, carrying what she would assume was her lemonade, collide with another. The glass smashed on the floor, sending lemonade everywhere. Bella jumped back from the bar, avoiding the spilt drink, only to bump into a passing stranger. She whipped around, turning her attention away from the foolish barmen and to the stranger she had bumped into.

"I'm so sorry! I'm ever so clumsy, always have been!" she rambled, not wanting to look the stranger in the eye. She heard a chuckle and took that as a sign of forgiveness. This giving her confidence, she looked up into a pair of waiting eyes. Gasping, she stepped back, knocking into a counter. She recognised his hair as the missing man at the table and the eyes as somebody else more significant.

"Are you okay?" he said, slightly worried that the beautiful creature before him may be in some form of distress. She nodded at him quickly but was reluctant to look him in the eye, he noticed. She was backing against the counter as if she thought he posed some threat towards her. He didn't, did he? "Hey, it's okay. I'm not going to hurt you" he soothed her. She looked up into his eyes and a slight sense of recognition washed over him. He looked her up and down once, trying to place this feeling. Nothing, he did not know this girl. He cannot recall seeing anyone this beautiful before, he would remember, surely? It was the eyes, just the eyes. Maybe he knew someone else with similar eyes, with the same sense of depth. He shrugged these thoughts off and returned his attention to her; she had been staring at him like he had three heads for the past minute or so.

"Really, I just want to make sure you're okay" he repeated, smiling at her slightly.

Bella relaxed a little. Of course she knew he would not hurt her, her Edward wouldn't do that. Even when they stopped talking he never hurt her, not physically anyway. She could understand how he had gouged her reaction as fear. Maybe that was what it was. But not fear of him, just fear of her old self, fear of further rejection.

She smiled weakly at him and he grinned back. _Gosh, he just gets better and better looking _she thought. He looked at something slightly to her left and then back at her, nodding his head slightly at something behind her. She turned quickly, losing her balance in the process. He caught her easily and chuckled, steadying her. She threw a quick and quiet thanks over her shoulder and turned her attention to the barman who had been watching their entire exchange with a new glass of Lemonade in his hand. She took it from him and turned back to Edward.

She was so surprised, yet excited, to see him again. She felt as if turning away would make him disappear and was relieved to find him still behind her when she turned. She smiled again before noticing Connor rise from his seat at their table. _Oh, god _she thought, this wasn't what she needed. Connor knew little bits about what had happened between her and Edward as kids and he had called Edward some very unflattering names. He walked over and stood beside Edward, ignoring him and focusing on Bella.

"Is everything okay?" he said flatly and harshly.

"Everything is fine" Edward answered. A look of anger crossed Connor's face momentarily before he composed himself. He looked over at Edward for the first time.

"I wasn't asking you, was I?" he bit back. He turned back to Bella and repeated his question. She nodded and smiled reassuringly, hinting for him to return to their table. He gave one more angry, fleeting look at Edward before stalking back to their table.

"Sorry about that" Bella said quietly

"Don't worry" he assured her, turning to the bar and ordering a whiskey.

It came to his attention that this girl was actually very quiet. Her appearance would lead one to think she had the confidence of a model but, upon talking to her, you would realise that she isn't one of those boisterous people who constantly seek attention. It was actually rather appealing. Actually, she was rather appealing, end of. He looked over at her again while waiting for his drink. Damn, she was good looking. Her dress fit perfectly and her face was one of the most interesting he had seen yet. She had a slight innocence about her and the contrast of her pale skin and dark hair only added to the effect.

He took his drink from the barman before turning back to her "so, what's your name then?" he asked, plastering his best crooked grin across his face.

Her heart sank. _He doesn't remember me. _She felt her heart break right then and there. He didn't remember. 15 years of childhood memories and he doesn't remember. So what if it was 13 years previously? She still remembered him! Then again, he was always more than a friend to her whereas he thought as her as only a friend. And obviously, judging by the way he simply forgot about her at the age of 16 when presented with new friends, she was ever that much of a friend anyway.

She sighed. _It was obviously too good to be true,_ she thought to herself idly as she looked down at her drink, readying herself to leave. And she'd thought she stood a chance of getting him back, then. She didn't care if he didn't want her the way she now realised she wanted him, even after 13 years. She would settle for friendship, she just wanted him back in her life. Apparently though, she didn't mean as much to him as she thought she did.

When she didn't answer his question he began to become nervous. So she was shy, okay, but does that mean she refuses to talk to everyone? Wasn't she quite sociable normally? Or was it him? Did she not want to bother with him? He wasn't used to that kind of response, normally when he introduced himself to a girl they were fascinated already. He tried again, unwilling to let this beautiful girl go without a fight.

"Y'know I'd really like to take you out sometime but I can't really do that if you won't tell me your name" he said, chuckling slightly, trying to lighten the mood.

Her head shot up. _That's got her interested _he thought. He smiled at her while she stared at him blankly for a second. She felt herself blushing under his gaze and decided she wouldn't stand for this. She took the glass that was in her hand and poured it over his head, smiling in satisfaction as the man that had caused her so much pain and forgotten shouted and wiped the lemonade from his eyes.

"What the hell?" he yelled, causing everyone in the restaurant to look around. _What, is she crazy? _He thought to himself, looking at her as if she were a psychopath. She saw Connor jump from his seat and run towards them, she glared at Edward once more before heading out the door, shortly followed by a bemused and worried Connor.

"What the hell was that?" Connor asked as they walked out the door and Bella marched down the road, towards his car.

"That was me throwing lemonade over an asshole" she fumed. She was just so _angry. _How could he? How could he not remember her? Did she mean so little? And then, he had the nerve to _flirt _with her? After she wasn't 'cool enough' or 'pretty enough' for him 13 years previously, now she's older he wants her. What an ass!

She reached Connor's car and waited by the door, glaring at him until he opened up. She got in and so did he. He began to drive and she sat, trying to calm herself in silence.

Eventually, the silence was just too much for Connor and he brought her out of her own little world. "So, what did he do to you?" he asked, his voice slightly strained. If that ass had hurt her then he would kill him, he would.

She was silent for a while before answering "He forgot me" she said simply.

Connor had no idea what she mean but the sadness in her voice made him want to go back to that place and kick that twat's head in. He pulled into the car park below her apartment and turned off the engine. He went around to her side of the car a pulled her out. He led her up the stairs and into her apartment. He sat her down on the sofa and made her a cup of tea. When he returned she looked a little less angry, a little sadder. More lost if he was honest.

"So, who was he?" he inquired once she had had a few sips and was leaning back against his chest, a little more relaxed.

"Edward. Do you remember me telling you about him? My best friend for 13 years and then forgot me over night"

Connor nodded. Yes, he remembered. What he had thought then and what he was thinking again now was how could he do that? Bella had shown him a picture of them together since she had moved here. He could see the resemblance between the boy in the picture and the man in the restaurant. He had looked so happy with Bella then, why would he turn away from her? Was he crazy? You would have to be to pass up somebody like Bella. Absolutely bonkers.

How did he not recognise her though? You would've thought that after that amount of time you would remember somebody who played such a massive part in your childhood. He could see the resemblance between the child Bella and the beautiful woman that was before him so why couldn't this Edward guy? Then again, he had been looking for it. This Edward would not have been. All the same, it must have been horrible feelings to have such an important person to you forget you. Well, maybe not forget but not recognise, perhaps. He shook his head. This would not do.

"You know what, Bella? That asshole doesn't deserve to even know someone like you" Connor told her, kissing her forehead lightly. She smiled slightly and turned to face him. "You're an amazing person and he would be fucking lucky to have someone like you in his life. You deserve someone truly amazing, not someone like him."

She looked at him. Did he really think that? Something in his eyes told her that he did. Something in his eye told her she couldn't doubt the way he felt about her. But what did she feel about him? She loved him, yes. But as anything more than a friend? She thought so. Look at the way he was treating her now, he was amazing, really he was. She knew he would do anything for her, he would be a wonderful other half. So what was holding her back? What was stopping her? She didn't know. Maybe it was the knowledge that, if this didn't go right, she would have lost one of her closest friends. Maybe it was the knowledge that she wasn't 100% sure about how she felt about him. Or, maybe it was the knowledge that the boy she spent her childhood crushing over is back.

_But I have no chance with Edward. _She reminded herself. So what if he had expressed some interest in her that night? Did it really matter now that she knew she had never meant much to him? She didn't want to be with him like this. She was just some girl he saw in a restaurant now, not Bella. Not his Bella like he used to call her. She didn't want to be anything to him if she wasn't 'his Bella'.

So that leaves Connor, somebody she knew she would have been with a long time ago if only she had let herself, somebody who truly cared about her and would do anything for her. She wanted somebody like that in her life and Connor would give her that. So, maybe it wasn't the best reason to be in a relationship with somebody but she truly did feel something for him and she was sure that this would intensify after time.

She looked him in the eye and saw the love they held. This was all the encouragement she needed and she leaned forward, towards him. Recognising the resolve her eyes held and her movement he instinctively went to meet her halfway, hoping that she was doing this for the right reasons and not just to forget about what the night had held. Even if it was just a distraction, he knew he would go along with it anyway, he felt so much for her to pass up this opportunity. He didn't have to control the say no.

**Ring, ring.**

The stopped, less than an inch apart, at the sound of the phone. They looked into each others eyes for a second before jumping apart, realising what they had nearly done. Bella ran towards the phone, mentally cursing herself while Connor tried to calm his breathing and, secretly, his disappointment that their moment hadn't happened.

"I should go" he said before she answered the phone, walking towards the door awkwardly.

"No!" she shouted back, startling them both. She didn't want her mistake to ruin their friendship. "I mean, stay in the spare room. It's too late to go now, really"

He nodded slightly before heading towards the spare room and closing the door, throwing himself on the bed and cursing. She stared after him, lost in both regret and disappointment.

"Hello?" she said down the phone once she had finally answered it. She was greeted by Alice's deafening screams and was forced to hold the phone at arms length.

"Alice, calm down" she soothed her

"Calm down?! _Calm down?! _I'll give you _calm down. _What the _hell _were you playing at?!" she shrieked. Jasper was trying to soothe her as she screamed down the phone at her best friend.

"I'm sorry, Alice. I was upset, okay?" she replied, sighing and sitting on her sofa. "Do you know who he was?"

"I do now" she replied, a little calmer, Jasper having worked his calming magic on her. "We were all asking what he did and somebody said your name. Something seemed to twig because he began swearing and looked really upset. He stormed off and still hasn't come back to the apartment" Alice waited for a minute "I would've never invited him if I had known what he'd done. He filled us in on how he treated you in Senior School. Damn, he was an idiot. And the flirting thing, that was out of order"

Bella sighed "Then why are you angry at me?"

"Because you should've handled it better, he obviously means a lot to you otherwise you wouldn't have been so upset about him forgetting you so why did you throw that in his face? You realise you've effectively ended the not-really-a-friendship friendship don't you?"

"Yeah, I do."

They talked for a while longer, Alice was trying to comfort her about Edward but felt she was getting nowhere.

"Bella, is there something else? You seem so down"

Bella sighed and told her about what had just happened with Connor and how she thought she had ruined their friendship.

"Well, about time!" Alice exclaimed. Wasn't this what she had been aiming for?

"Alice, think of this from my perspective for once, not that of a match maker! What should I do?" Bella moaned

Alice thought for a minute, "go in there and kiss him silly. Show him how you feel!" she heard Bella sigh down the phone in frustration and continued to explanation "You guys should have gotten together a long time ago, you both like each other and you get along so well! This was bound to happen so why fight it?"

"I just want to be sure I'm doing this for the right reasons." Bella replied "What if I make a move and we're together for a few weeks and I realise I made a mistake? What if I realise that I love him more as a brother?"

"Well then you will know for sure. Isn't it better that you gave it a go and it didn't work out than sitting around, too scared to do anything, and never know? You would regret never finding out what would happen, I can promise you that"

Bella thought about it; she was right, really. She would rather know than wonder forever. Maybe making a move would be a good thing. Maybe things would work out for the best and they would work out? And if they didn't then at least she would know. At least she could say she gave it a go. And who says it would stop their friendship? Who said they wouldn't be friends after?

"Bella, you can do this. You guys are great together"

"Y'know what? You're right. I _can _do this, and I will." Bella said and Alice squealed down the phone.

"fill me in tomorrow!" Alice ordered before she said goodbye.

"Wish me luck" Bella said

"Good luck. Not that you need it" Alice chimed "bye!"

"Bye"

Bella hung up and placed the phone on its cradle. She walked to the door of the guest room and stood, with the adrenaline coursing through her veins, for a few seconds before she opened the door. Connor was about to climb into bed with only his jeans on. He looked at her, bemused at first, before she strode up to him and pulled him to her for a long, passionate kiss.

**I'm sorry about the wait. The truth is I don't really have time to write in the week as Monday is my only day with an afternoon free and I tend to waste that on school work. So basically, although I will try and write in the week, I think updates will only be at weekends. **

**So maybe that wasn't the romance you wanted but remember what I said before; B/E will happen, just with some mishaps along the way. **

**Leave a thought?**


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry about the wait, I've had a pretty busy week. Luckily (for you) the youth club I spend most of my week at is only open on Wednesday, the one day this week I can't do. SO, as long as I don't get masses of homework, there may be some more updates this week. **

**Thanks to all who read, reviewed and added this story so far. =)**

**So, I got a few responses that were just like 'WTF? What about Edward?' and I will say this **_**only one more time! **_**E/B WILL HAPPEN. Okay? Got that? Good. =) **

The next morning Bella opened her bedroom door to see Connor doing exactly the same. The events of the previous night were temporarily forgotten as they both giggled at the coincidence but they quickly stopped. They smiled at each other, somewhat awkwardly, before both stepping into the hallway and walking to the kitchen.

"Coffee?" Bella asked quietly, trying to figure out what to do now and slightly panicked that this would be how their relationship would be from now on.

Last night, Connor had been more than willing to return the kiss and she had departed his room, smiling at him in silence. However, now everything seemed to be much more uncomfortable as they both seemed to be having some doubts about the events of the night before. Bella wondered whether he had only returned the kiss, and that was all it was, so as to not upset her. Or, maybe last night the kiss had seemed like a good idea to him but now he could see the error of his ways and wished for nothing to happen between them again.

They ate breakfast in an awkward silence and Connor left the apartment as soon as possible. He rushed home and collapsed on his sofa in exasperation. _Why did I do that? _He kept on asking himself as he lay, staring at the ceiling. He couldn't help but feel that he had ruined their relationship.

Why did she do that? Had somebody told her about his feelings for her and she had felt sorry for him? Was the previous night a pity date?

He sat and thought for a while before sighing and going to get dressed. Once he had sorted himself out a little he sat back on his sofa and picked up the phone. He needed to talk to somebody. He usually called Bella when he had something on his mind. He couldn't do that now. He contemplated for a moment before tapping in Alice's numbers. _She will know what to do, _he told himself.

Across town, Alice's phone began to ring and she pounced on it, ready for Bella to fill her in on the night's events. She didn't even bother looking at the ID before snapping it open.

"Hey, Bells! Tell me everything!" she chimed down then phone only for her smile to falter slightly when she Connor spoke.

"It's not Bella, it's Connor" he said sadly. She suppressed a sigh. It wasn't that she didn't want to talk to him, she did, it was just that she wanted the dirty details and she sure as hell wouldn't get them from him.

"Hey, sorry, Bella told me she would ring me this morning so I assumed it would be her" she explained as she went into the kitchen and began tidying the counter, straightening up anything that was out of place.

"It's okay" he replied in the same sad tone he had used before.

"Are you okay?" Alice asked worriedly, this wasn't like him. He was their bubbly friend; happy no matter what.

"Not really" he admitted. Alice sighed and sat down on one of the stools. There could only be one explanation for him being this sad so suddenly; Bella.

"It didn't work out, then?"

"I've ruined everything, Alice!" he moaned down the phone in frustration.

"Why? What happened?"

"Nothing happened, that's the point. We kissed last night, I mean _really _kissed and then this morning it was just so awkward. I think she regrets it" he sighed again, waiting for Alice to reply.

"Who kissed who?"

"She kissed me" he admitted quietly

"Then she must have wanted to" Alice soothed him "She wouldn't do it other wise"

"Maybe she knows how I feel about her, maybe she just felt sorry for me"

"Connor, you and I both know she wouldn't do that to anyone! She doesn't lead people on, you know that."

They talked like this for some time until Alice finally managed to convince Connor that the awkwardness they experienced that morning was just a product of both their nervousness and self consciousness surfacing.

"Be more confident and go for it!" Alice urged "You both want to be together so just go for it!"

Eventually, he hung up, fully prepared to go round there and fix things between the two of them. He felt much more confident about the situation and was extremely grateful to Alice, without her words of wisdom he would still be sulking. He couldn't let this opportunity pass.

Alice smiled happily after she hung up, quickly composing a text to Bella and sending it.

_Am coming over to get details, stay in. Alice x_

She closed her phone and then picked up her stuff, ready to go for the weekly food shopping trip. She would _conveniently _forget to go to Bella's so that she would be in when Connor went around.

Meanwhile, Bella was sitting in her apartment, reading a book. She sighed for about the hundredth time that day and put the book down. She just couldn't concentrate on anything today. She put it down to her apprehension about Connor. Still, how was she doing to get on with anything and forget about it if she can't stop thinking about it? Giving up, she decided she would go shopping to kill some time. She was in need of a few new books and quite wanted a CD or two. She would have to get some new mascara while she was out, as well.

She went to her wardrobe and pulled out some clothes, she put them on quickly and did her makeup, not wanting to go into the centre of London in her jogging bottoms and ratty shirt in case she a journalist snapped her like it and she ended up in the 'hall of shame' in a fashion magazine. That was not what she wanted.

She looked herself over in the mirror before she left. She smile, satisfied with her decision. She wore a pair of black, knee length shorts and a blue and white striped long sleeved shirt with a grey jumper over the top, the sleeves rolled up and the sleeves of the shirt tucked over the jumper.

She heard her phone bleep and she went to find it, flipping it open to see a message from Alice. _Drat, _she thought, _I was supposed to call her, now she's probably peeved that she hasn't gotten any details yet. _

She opened the message and was surprised to see there was no abuse in the message. Although, she was not surprised that Alice obviously couldn't wait for the information to go to her and so she was going to the information herself.

She didn't bother replying; instead she went to the kitchen to make some coffee so that it would be ready for when she got there. Bella wasn't even bothered that her plans to go shopping were foiled, she just wanted some distraction and Alice definitely provided that.

Not long later, she heard a knock on her door and she opened it up, stunned to see Connor standing awkwardly in the doorway. She noticed not only how nervous he looked but how good he looked. He was wearing what she had told him once was her favourite outfit of his. It was pretty simple, really. A pair of mid blue jeans and a grey, long sleeved shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He had a black, grey and white scarf on which had a disarray of patterns on it and he stood, fiddling nervously with it.

"Hey" she said quietly. He looked up and smiled slightly before stepping into the doorway and planting a firm, soft kiss on her lips.

……**..**

"Come on, can't I take my girlfriend to dinner once in a while?" Connor teased down the phone as Bella laughed

"I don't mind cooking" she insisted

"But you're always cooking, _please?" _he pleaded down the phone, she could practically head the pout in his voice.

"Fine" she said after a while. She heard him celebrating and rolled her eyes, telling him she would see him at 7 and hung up.

She padded through to her room and searched through her wardrobe, she decided that she would go casual since she knew they wouldn't be going anywhere overly expensive, she knew he preferred a more laid back setting for this kind of thing. She pulled on a pair of light blue knee length jeans and a yellow, loose fitting v-neck.

She did her makeup and then sat around, waiting for him to pick her up. She noticed that in her excitement she had dressed half an hour early. She wandered around, trying to find something to do while waiting for him to appear.

This was the sixth week since their first kiss and they were getting closer and closer. She found that her theory of liking Connor more and more one they were together was true, for the most part. She was still not sure if she _loved _him but she definitely liked him and was glad to be with him. The hole in her life that there was before now had subsided slightly and it was not so often that she found herself asking if she was missing out on anything.

He knocked on the door about 10 minutes later and she sprang to her feet, opening the door and greeting him with a quick kiss.

"You're early" she giggled as she pulled on a cardigan and grabbed her bag. She closed the door behind them and headed down the stairs with him behind her.

"I couldn't wait" he admitted, kissing her again. She giggled lightly before deepening the kiss. Eventually, they pulled apart, slightly breathless, and headed towards his car.

"Where're we going?" Bella asked after a while.

"It's a surprise" he grinned.

She moaned, "You know I hate surprises"

"You won't hate this one, promise" he smiled at her before returning his full attention to the road.

20 minutes later, they were puling into a small car park on a dainty little street in one of the quietest places in London. She looked puzzled as he lead her down the road and he just smiled, knowing she would love what was about to come. They rounded a corner and he led her to a small café that looked onto the picturesque streets that surrounded it. The sun was casting a orange glow upon everything as it began to set as they sat down in the nearly empty café. Bella was smiling happily as she watched the sun go down on what seemed like a perfect summer's day.

"You were right," she said, eventually turning her attention to Connor "I do love it"

He smiled happily at her before ordering some drinks and settling back in his seat to enjoy what would be a lovely evening.

…………**.**

"Sounds nice" Alice grinned as her and Bella trailed around the shops in London, preparing for Bella's next big shoot. Bella was telling her about the previous night at the little café and seemed to be happier than Alice had seen her in a long time. It reminded Alice slightly of when she had first met James, when she was excited about the new romance and they went out all the time and spent as much time together as possible. She just hoped that Connor wouldn't be just another James. Although they were showing no signs of loosing the air of excitement in their relationship she was keeping a weary eye out for when that began to happen.

She had thought that they would make an amazing couple and, to the outside world, they looked great together. They got along and they seemed to want to be together. Then again, this reminded Alice, again, of the early Bella and James.

Alice shook her head, trying to concentrate on what Bella was saying. _She seems genuinely happy _she told herself _they'll be fine, stop worrying. _She continued to pad around the shops, dragging the jabbering Bella along with her and trying to shake the feeling that, maybe, their relationship would fade away. _Still, _she said _it's early on yet, I could be wrong. _

She took Bella home to her now empty home. Jasper's friends that left the week before and she was now enjoying basking in the space she was presented with in her abode.

_I suppose that's another thing, _she thought as she put the kettle on and Bella looked at some photos from Jasper's sister's wedding, _with Connor around she had no time to mope around about Edward. What a convenient distraction. _

Alice has thought that, after their abrupt meeting in the restaurant, Bella would be upset about it and wouldn't let it go. However, she was proved wrong. Alice hadn't heard Bella so much as mention Edward's name since her and Connor had gotten together. Edward however, who had abruptly left that very night through either guilt or cowardice, had kept in touch with Jasper and Alice and had been oh-so-casually been asking about Bella. Asking whether she was upset by their meeting or whether she had asked after him at all. Unfortunately, he was always left disappointed when he found out she has seemed quite unfazed by his reappearance.

Panic suddenly welled up inside Alice. What if Bella was with Connor because she wanted to forget about Edward? Hadn't Bella already explained how much she had liked Edward as a child? Who was to say that those feelings would just disappear? Maybe the reunion had brought back feelings for Bella that she believed were better off forgotten?

But, Alice thought, Bella didn't use people. She had pointed that out to Connor 6 weeks previously, had she not? She knew Bella and Bella wouldn't do that. But, what if she didn't _realise _what she was doing? What if the reappearance of Edward, and the feelings that came with him, had caused any feelings she had for Connor to intensify? Maybe it was a reaction to the fresh wave of rejection that Edward had brought with him. Maybe she was subconsciously trying to prove something to herself. That, no matter what he thinks, somebody out there _does _value her.

Alice shook her head one more time, pushing these thoughts right to the back of her head. They shopped for a while longer before returning to Bella's place and doing the annual 'sort out' of Bella's wardrobe, setting aside anything to be taken to charity.

They sat and talked for a while before Alice invited Bella, and possibly Connor, to come to dinner at her and Jasper's house that following night. Bella accepted and said she would talk to Connor and let Alice know. After Alice left, Bella ran herself a bath and called Connor.

"Sorry. I can't. I said I'd go to dinner with my mum. She's been looking forward to it for weeks" Connor said down the phone, cursing himself for not having planned better.

"Its okay" Bella replied, slightly deflated "I understand. Hope you have a nice time"

They talked for a while longer before they bid each other goodnight and Bella went to bed.

……**.**

"I'm coming, I'm coming!" Jasper shouted as he padded his way groggily through the apartment towards the door. Somebody was banding on the door repeatedly and had not only woken up Alice and Jasper but probably their entire street.

He ferociously opened the door, momentarily abandoning his usual calm and collected state. He stopped short when he saw a soaked Edward Cullen standing in his doorway with a single suitcase.

"Hey" Edward said casually as Jasper regained himself.

"Hey" he replied, taking Edward's bag off him and stepping aside so he could step inside and shelter from the rain. "No offence, man, but what are you doing on my door step in the middle of the night?" he inquired once Edward was inside and had his jacket off.

Alice came through from the bedroom and looked at Edward once before panic ignited in her eyes. Jasper wondered whether this had anything to do with Bella or just the fact he was dripping on the carpet.

She hurriedly took his coat and gave him some of Jasper's clothes to change into before pushing him into the bathroom to change. Once he was in there Alice turned to glare at Jasper.

"Did you invite him?" she asked

"No, I had no idea he was coming" he assured her. She calmed down a little before sitting on a stool and putting her head in her hands.

"What're we going to do?" she asked him "We have Bella coming for tea tomorrow, or today by the looks of things." She groaned once more before they heard the bathroom door open and Edward entered the kitchen to see a calm and collected Alice and Jasper.

"I'm really sorry about just turning up like this" he said after Alice had stuffed some food down his neck. "I would've called but I lost my phone and I couldn't remember your new number"

"Don't worry about it" Jasper assured him "how long you planning on staying?" he inquired.

"A few weeks, maybe?" Edward replied, pulling his hand through his drying hair "I'll find somewhere else to stay, mind. I wouldn't want to cramp your style" he joked.

Jasper laughed "Don't be silly, you're more than welcome here. Stay as long as you need"

Edward smiled, "Thanks, It's appreciated"

Jasper nodded, "so, what you planning on doing while you're here?"

"Oh, I've got some things I need to sort out" Edward replied.

_More like a lot of things I need to sort out _he thought to himself.

**So I know it's not really long enough to make up for the wait but it's a chapter, right?**

**Wrong attitude, I know.**

**Leave a thought? **


	6. Chapter 6

**Apologies about the lack of updates for my other story, 'Places to go, People to forget', I'm still struggling with it! Good news though, Easter Break! I will keep trying to write for PTG PTF and maybe I'll get it right, **_**eventually. **_

**So last update I said I would be writing more in the week cause the youth club I go to isn't open, and now I'm adding yet another excuse to what seems to be a bottomless pit of unacceptable explanations for why I don't update as often as I used to. My 'justification' is; coursework. Seriously, I've had to stay behind at school 3 out of 5 days this week for ICT, bringing the amount of school ICT I did last week up to about 8 hours. They're even opening the school for a group of about 30 of us in the holidays because we're so behind. So yeah, I've been pretty tied down but it's not the best excuse, I know. **

**And after that unimportant idiocy that basically meant nothing I give you chapter 6. **

Around 5 hours later Edward awoke to the sound of the vacuum cleaner. He knew within a second that it was Alice, although he hadn't spent much time with her, he knew for Jasper's stories that she was very particular when it came to cleanliness. He listened to her hustling and bustling around for a while and, once she had turned off the vacuum, he got out of bed and headed towards the kitchen.

When he walked in she was polishing the table in the dining room, she smiled kindly at him and bid him good morning, telling him to go through to the kitchen and following him. She sat him down at the breakfast bar and asked if he would like eggs or toast. Knowing from previous experience that you could not decline this offer, he settled for eggs and watched her flurry around as she prepared his breakfast.

"I'm sorry for turning up so abruptly" he said when everything was in the pan and she was getting a plate out for him. She smiled at him kindly and, although she was undoubtedly sincere, he couldn't help but notice the slightly presence of apprehension on her features.

"Don't worry about it, like Jasper said, you're always welcome here"

He thanked her again before she placed the food in front of him. It wasn't until he smelt the food that he realised just how hungry he was, having not eaten since yesterday morning due to travelling. He began to eagerly fork the eggs into his mouth and she walked away, smiling and shaking her head at the sight before her.

Jasper soon got up and he started to make his own breakfast while talking to the ever apologising Edward but was stopped when Alice made her way through, extravagantly removing the knife from Jasper's hands as he began to cut the bread to make some toast. He simply gave up, knowing he would not win, and thanked her. The three of them talked easily until Edward decided to go and get change, thus giving the couple some time alone before the guests arrive.

He powered up his laptop and sat on his bed, deciding he would change later. He went through his emails, answering the important ones and ignoring the minor, more trivial ones. He began to write an email to his adopted parents, explaining he had returned to London for a while. They were aware that he had cut his last trip short and had encouraged him to return but they sensed his reluctance to return and, eventually, let him be. Although, he was sure that if they knew of his reasons for returning then they would surely put him on the next train to London. In truth, he was too ashamed to tell anyone, he had stayed in a hotel for a week before returning to his house in Edinburgh, where he had moved 6 months previously, and told his parents that in the short interval that he had been away from the busy, English capital, it had lost its shine.

He knew how much of a coward he had been to run away when he had seen Bella after all these years, and he didn't want to admit that to anybody, especially his parents who, after he had cut his friendship with her short at the age of 16, had urged him constantly to get in touch. They had told him he was throwing away a perfect friend, and in hind sight, he was. They were the best of friends as children and he was sure that if he hasn't have been so idiotic that they would still be very good friends. However, he had done what he had done and now there was no way to erase the past.

He knew how much he had hurt her when he had began to ignore her, and he had always felt slightly bad about it but had never let it get to him. He had always maintained that she would get over the loss and move on, finding herself new friends as he had done.

He looked at the blank screen in front of him, trying to come up with a way of explaining his spur of the moment trip to the centre of London. What could he write? Could her tell them about Bella? He didn't think so; they would get excited and expect the two to click again, when in fact exactly the opposite had already taken place. He had driven her away and he wouldn't be surprised if she didn't want to see him again.

He thought for a while longer before sighing and typing a quick message.

"_Dear mum and dad,_

_I'm staying with Jasper in London for a few weeks. _

_Sorry about the short notice, I just wanted a quick break from work, some new inspiration to write etc._

_See you soon_

_Love you,_

_Edward."_

He read it through once and then pressed send, satisfied. He knew that if he brought up his music they would be pleased. Of course, this meant he would have to write something while he was here. Not that that bared a problem, he was sure there was plenty of inspiration lying around the streets of London just waiting to be stumbled upon, it was just a case of finding it.

He looked at the time and then quickly jumped in the shower, wanting to look the best for the night. Jasper had explained that Alice had been planning a dinner party for a while and was inviting Bella and some other friends to dinner that night and that he was welcome to join them but if he didn't want to they would understand. Edward had assured him that he would love to join them for dinner, keeping his anxieties to himself. Secretly, he was absolutely petrified about Bella's reaction to him being there and just hoped that there wouldn't be anything too heavy around for her to throw at him.

After he had showered and returned to his room, he pawed through his suitcase to find something to wear, after all, he had to look half decent. He doubted, however that his attire would affect the way Bella thought of him. He thought of her as he continued trying to find some clothes, not succeeding in finding something that he felt would catch the attention of such a beautiful woman as Bella.

He sighed, boy had she changed. She was stunning, breathtaking, striking and more. He couldn't help but remind himself that if he hadn't thrown away their friendship as children he would still be on fabulous terms with this beautiful creature. Just looking at her caused him pain, she was so beautiful and yet she couldn't be his, _wouldn't _be his.

As a child, he had never paid much attention to her looks; she was Bella; his all-time favourite friend and the one person, other than family members, that he loved. He was aware of his looks from a young age but never did anything about it; he didn't need anyone apart from her. But, as they grew up the year gap between them got more and more evident. The year in which school separated them, when he went up to senior school and she was still in primary school, forced him to make new friends. He could no longer see her in the playground; no longer sit with her at lunch. He was forced to make new friends, and he did. The only problem was, when she finally did join him in senior school, it wasn't quite the same. Maybe she noticed it, maybe she didn't. She had been forced to do the same as him in that year, she too had made friends and their friendship suffered.

Nevertheless, they were still close, still looked forward to seeing each other every day after school. It wasn't until he started to notice the attention that females gave him that their friendship really suffered. He would skip a meeting with Bella for a date with a pretty girl, a party with friends, a movie with an acquaintance, anything that might allow him to meet new people, new girls to give him attention. He didn't know why he had done it, why he had replaced her with meaningless girls and friends, on hindsight; he knew he was only looking for a friend that could be as good as her, so why did he ditch her? Who knew? He sure as hell didn't.

The more he skipped their meetings, the more Bella became hesitant to spend time with him. They became strangers to one another; their friendship was from another time, another era, another world.

Sighing, he pulled out a plain white top and jeans. He pulled them on and then put a red and blue checked shirt over the top, leaving it unbuttoned. He glanced at the time; their guests would be arriving soon.

He joined Alice and Jasper in the kitchen, sitting on one of the barstools. Alice had been hard at work all day, she had set out plated of food all over the kitchen counters, all kinds of food, laid out in her own professional-looking manner. She just hoped it would all get eaten, if it didn't then they would have to give some to everyone to take home.

The three spoke for a while before the door bell rang and Alice sprang to her feet, excitedly skipping towards the door while Edward and Jasper watched her with amused expressions on their faces. Edward prayed silently that it wasn't Bella at the door, the more people around, the better.

He let out a silent sigh of relief when he saw that it was a tall, black haired woman followed by a lean red head. They were introduced as Ciara and Liam; Edward shook their hands and talked to them graciously as they waited for other guests.

Soon, Anna, Zara and Alana all entered, followed by Matt and Abigail. Edward watched momentarily as Alice flitted between the guests, offering drinks and nibbles and Jasper stood, taking to the males of the congregation. After a while, he stood and joined Jasper, Matt and Lucas. It came to his awareness that all of these people where all highly dressed, they gave off the impression of wealth and confidence. The girls were all very beautiful while the males were handsome, Edward came to the conclusion that some of the must be models of sorts, friends from Alice's career. Any of the others would undoubtedly be colleagues of Jasper's.

The party grew still, as Kayla, Aiden and Lucas entered, and Edward began to wonder whether Bella was actually coming, had she head he was there and pulled out? Was she ill? He hoped not. As he engaged in a conversation with Alana, Kayla and Lucas he began to wonder whether Alice and Jasper's flat could withstand any more people. Sure, it was a big enough flat but surely if there were any more people the place would just become crowded?

"I haven't seen you around before, you a friend of Jasper's?" Lucas asked

"Yeah, I went to college with him, moved away a few years back. I'm just visiting" Edward replied

"Oh, I see" Lucas nodded "Were you in the group of his friends he had over a few weeks back?"

"No," Edward shook his head, before adding "I stayed a night but left early,"

"The city not for you, then?" Lucas smiled

Edward shook his head, "It's not that, I just… needed to go home" he said quietly, hoping that Lucas would drop the subject.

Luckily, Lucas received the hint loud and clear and changed the subject.

"You know anyone in here?" Lucas inquired after he had taken a sip of his beer

Edward shook his head "Not apart from Alice and Jasper," he looked at the faces "They all look very… stylish" he said, not knowing what to say.

Lucas laughed, "That's model's for you, mate. Every one of them apart from me, Jasper and Alana are models. What about you?"

"Musician," Edward said, looking over the faces again. Yes, he could tell who were not into modelling; they were still stylish but a little more natural than the others.

"Really?" Lucas asked, raising his eyebrows. When Edward nodded he let out a low pitch whistle before smiling and asking about the bang "You any good then? Would I have heard of you?"

Edward considered; were they any good? He thought so, and obviously some people did or they wouldn't have sold any records, would they? Would he had heard of them? Possibly not, Edward was well aware they had not made it big, they were not exactly main-stream so it would depend on his taste on music.

"Not sure, 'The Circus is coming' ring any bells?" Edward asked, smiling when Lucas looked blank "Thought not"

They talked for a while longer before a girl with shoulder length blond-brown hair came up to them. She asked if either of them would like a drink as she was getting one herself. Edward declined but Lucas asked for a can of Pepsi, declining a beer as he was driving home that night.

When she walked away Lucas took it upon himself to fill Edward in.

"That's Alana; she's a history teacher down at the local school. She's a nice girl, a bit quiet maybe but nice all the same."

Edward nodded, looking over to her direction to see her talking to a male. Lucas followed his gaze,

"That's Matt, about the same age; he's a male model, as you can probably tell. He lives just down the road from here"

Lucas quickly went through all of the people in the room. Edward discovered that it really was only Jasper, Lucas, Alana and himself that were not involved in modelling. Zara, Anna and Abigail were all models for a reasonably big chain in the centre of London, Alice was their stylist for shoots and they had all hit is off straight away. Kayla, a former model, had worked with Alice as her stylist for nearly 4 years and had only recently retired from the modelling side of the business, taking up fashion photography instead. Aiden was her other half, he too was a male model and they had met while on a shoot two years previously.

He stood and spoke to Lucas for a while before he had to take a call and went through to the dining room where he could have a private conversation. He apologised for leaving Edward alone and quickly retired to the next room. Edward didn't waste any time alone, instead he ventured over to Alice, who was surrounded by Zara, Abigail and Alana, and offered them all drinks. They all accepted and Alana offered to help him as he did not have 5 hands.

They went through to the kitchen and Alana passed Edward the glasses as he needed them. He smiled gratefully as she handed the last of the glasses over. Lucas was right; she was quite quiet.

"So, I hear you're a history teacher?" Edward said as he poured the last of the red wine into a glass and put the empty bottle on the side, reaching for a bear for himself.

She nodded, "yes, it wasn't something I ever saw myself doing but I don't know where I would be without it, I love it"

Edward smiled as he handed her a glass, she seemed enthusiastic, something that was often missing from teachers these days, he had found, in his own school career, that the most enthusiastic teachers were always the best ones.

"What made you become a teacher, then?" he enquired, he had always wondered what urged people to follow such a career path. Why one would like to spend the day getting abuse from rowdy teenagers he never did quite understand, then again, not all teenagers were bad.

"Well, I've always loved history and during school we were always encouraged to pursue our interests. I was stuck as to what to do for a career and I remember trying to think of something I enjoy that I could stand doing for a living. History was the first thing that came to my mind but I couldn't think of how I could do something like that without incorporating teaching but I couldn't come up with anything. I've always been a very quiet person, I was very shy as a child and lacked in confidence, public speaking was the bane of my existence so I ruled out teaching for good." She looked thoughtful for a moment before looking at him again, she seemed encouraged by the interested expression he wore and continued "I did a degree in history; nevertheless, as I couldn't bare to do anything I didn't love. As I grew up and went through college and university, my confidence grew, I became accustomed to public speaking and once I had gotten over that hurdle, I saw no reason why I couldn't become a teacher."

When she had finished her story, she smiled contently and took another sip from her drink. He smiled back, somewhat inspired. He knew about wanting to change your life to achieve something that you really wanted but never quite saw plausible, but he had never known anyone to really do it on such a scale. He had known people who had tried to get somewhere and achieved, yes, there had been a few thriving for a promotion and finally gotten their reward, but none of them had changed so drastically. Really, all the promotion needs is a few extra hours, a little more elbow grease, a little initiative, and although it is not that easy to stand above the rest in such a competitive world, thriving for a promotion in a average job was never amazingly inspiring to him.

However, to be told that people really can change their ways to achieve their dream gave him some hope, maybe one day, when he grows tired of the music scene – and granted, this may take a long time – he may pursue some other career path, one that maybe seem a little far fetched at first but he would get there eventually. Just as the little shy girl gets to be a confident, strong woman who faces her former fears everyday of her life.

They chatted for a while longer before remembering that they needed to take the drinks through to the others, once they had done they sat on the sofa and chatted. As interesting as the conversation was, Edward could not help but apprehensively glance at the clock every now and then, both dreading but longing for the moment Bella would arrive.

The other guests had arrived at 6, they had already eaten about half of the nibbles and they had worked their way through a fair share a drinks, resulting in a few individuals becoming a little more open and enthusiastic than normal and the laughter and volume levels to increase.

"You buzzing to get out of here or am I just dull?" Alana asked eventually, aware of his apprehension for something and not failing to notice his apparent interest in the clock that hung above the stereo player.

Edward snapped his head around to look at her, "N-no, sorry" he stumbled. Had he really been so anti-social? Had he been so obviously fascinated with the time? "I'm sorry, I'm enjoying your company, really I am" he assured her, smiling at her and trying to show as much sincerity as possible. After all, if it wasn't for this conversation, he would probably be forced to endure the company of Aiden and Kayla who had both been making the most of the free drinks and were now thoroughly enjoying one another's company on the sofa.

"Its okay" she said quietly, acknowledging his apology and glancing at the clock herself. It was nearly 9 o'clock; if he was waiting for somebody then surely they would have turned up already? And if he was waiting for the party to be over then why didn't he just leave himself? He was staying with Alice and Jasper, was he not? They wouldn't mind if he excused himself for a while.

"May I ask what you're waiting for or is that being intrusive?" she inquired after a brief silence in which he had returned his gaze to the clock.

He looked at her, as if searching her for some kind of ulterior motive, would she broadcast his apprehension to see Bella? Would she be amused? Would she not care? He doubted that she would be greatly interested in his memories of her as a child but knew that she would be polite and hear him out. Something about her made him think she was trustworthy, that she would not tell and poke fun at him.

"It's okay," he said after a while "I don't mind you knowing"

She waited patiently for a moment before he started again "Actually, I'm waiting for Bella, Bella Swan. She was supposed to be here and she hasn't turned up. We're old friends, you see."

She nodded, it made sense she supposed.

"Well, last I heard she _was _coming. Her and her boyfriend were invited but I think only she could come. She'll turn up, she wouldn't bail without letting us know first" she said confidently, aware that she had lost his attention somewhere in the middle of the statement.

She patted his shoulder and stood, telling him she would return soon after a much deserved trip to the restroom. He remained unresponsive and still as she walked off.

His heart was beating fast, all he could think was '_Boyfriend? What does she mean boyfriend?_'. He just couldn't accept that she would be with somebody else, couldn't bare to think of that beautiful creature to be with another man. He had missed his chance. He had it bad for her and now all hope of them had been completely smashed.

He had known that the idea of them becoming anything but friends was obscure as she obviously didn't even think of him as a friend anymore. But one could always hope, right?

He shook his head; he knew nothing would come of him and Bella - that much was obvious from her reaction towards their last meeting. So if he knew that they would never be together, what explained the blinding streak of jealousy that was stabbing his heart every time he thought of her?

He didn't understand it. He didn't understand how he could feel this way about her, it was the way he had felt about her as kids tenfold. It was crazy, it was irrational, it was scary. He had loved her as a child, yes, but not in this way. This was something completely different.

He had to let this go. He had to let _her _go. He had to let her be happy with this man.

He knew though, that he needed to at least apologise for what he had done as a child. That was the reason he had returned, well, it was if you take away all the longing to be near her, to see her beautiful face again.

He shook his head one final time when Alana returned to the sofa and tried to concentrate on their conversation. They were soon joined by Alice and Zara who sat on the arms of the sofa and joined in their casual conversation.

After a while, Alice looked over at the clock and sighed, "I don't think Bella is coming," she said sadly. At the mention of Bella's name, Edward's head snapped up and he looked at the clock again and sighed himself, resigning himself to spend another guilty night thinking of her.

Zara excused herself to go and speak to Matt and Alana, who had not failed to notice the expression on both Edward's and Alice's face urged Alice to give Bella a call. She nodded and departed, looking for her mobile.

"Thanks" Edward said after a while

She shook her head "Did it occur to you that I might want to see her too?" she joked. Edward smiled appreciatively and they waited in a comfortable silence for Alice to return.

"Her car's broken down," Alice informed the pair as se sat back down on the sofa. "She was on the way over here and her it died, she had to wait forever to get the recovery vehicle over there, y'know because of the traffic, and she's on her way to the garage at the moment. They couldn't fix it by the road side so they're towing her," she sighed once again before sitting with a full blown pout on her tiny lips. Alana remained quiet, also disappointed. She hadn't seen Bella in a while and would love to have a good catch up with her. Still, it was for another day now.

Edward didn't know whether to be upset of relieved. On one hand, he wouldn't have to face her for at least another day. On the other, he wouldn't see that face of hers for at least another day. And he wouldn't have said what he wanted to say.

Upon seeing the deflated expression Alice wore, Jasper strode up to the trio and asked what the problem was.

"So she isn't coming?" Jasper asked, just as disappointed as the others. Alice nodded and he thought for a moment before asking another question "How is she getting home if her car is going to be in there for a while?"

They all thought for a moment before Alana answered "she'll probably get a taxi"

At that, Edward exchanged a worried look with Jasper. They knew the stories about young women taking taxis alone and although it was highly unlikely that anything would happen to her, you never know what kind of psycho's there were out there.

Jasper took Alice's phone and dialled Bella's number. The other three looked at him quizzing as he waited for her to pick up, when she did he asked her where she was and, when she said she was at the garage about to call for a taxi, he told her to stay put.

"I'm going to come and collect you, that way you can come back here," he told her

"No, you can stay the night" he said as she began to argue, saying he would not want to take her home in the middle of the night.

"yes, I'm sure" he laughed. Alice, who had brightened up over the duration on the conversation, squealed and giggled. Alana just rolled her eyes in Edward's direction, as if to say "always worrying about others".

He said a few words more, took the address of the garage from her and then hung up. He told the trio he would be back within 20 minutes and then left the flat.

Edward went through to the kitchen, in need of a little Dutch courage if he was going to attempt to talk to her again.

He passed the crowd that was now congregating in the dining room, finding it hard to stand and instead sitting on the table that Alice had so carefully cleaned that previous morning. He noticed how depleted the stock of alcohol had become and looked over at the crowd again. He hoped that they would all be taking a taxi home; none of them were in a fit condition for driving.

He downed a glass of whiskey he found in the cupboard, hoping that Jasper wouldn't mind, and then returned to sit with Alana and Alice on the sofa. They were both now in better spirits and Edward was a little more relaxed.

Eventually, they heard the door open and close as Jasper entered with Bella. Alice and Alana jumped up to greet them while Edward remained sitting, not wanting to draw attention to himself so quickly. She should at least be allowed to say hello to friends before he messed up her evening. Well, what was left of it.

He heard their laughter from the hallway and heard their chatter getting louder and louder as they came through to the living room. He took a deep breath before he got up and turned around, ready to greet Bella.


	7. Chapter 7

**Thank you to all who read, reviewed or added this story, it is truly appreciated. =)**

**I was thinking earlier about the hit to review ratio and about how hardly anyone reviews stuff that they read. For example, I have had over 1,200 hits for this story so far and 35 reviews. Bit of a difference, huh? I totally understand people not reviewing, I mean I'll admit (ashamed as I am) that I'm not a regular reviewer and do not review every story I read. BUT I do when there is something up for grabs, say, a preview for the next chapter? (Yeah, I'm selfish and greedy, but y'know, W/E :P)**

**So, from now on I will be keeping a chapter ahead of the posting and will be sending a quick preview of the next chapter to everyone that reviews. I will send it to **_**everyone **_**although I would prefer it if you would give me a little more feedback than 'update soon' (although I do appreciate even that).**

**I know I make a habit of leaving ludicrously long author notes, apologies, but I just wanted to get that idea out there as your feedback is very important to me. =)**

He gasped as he saw her; she wore a dark dress with a colourful floral pattern across the chest. It was a very summery dress yet she managed to make it look fit for the occasion. She looked sophisticated, formal and beautiful. She wore a long necklace and had a black, casual bag with her.

He stood, waiting for her to notice him and grab the nearest object to throw. She didn't notice him at first; she was too absorbed in her conversation with Alice, Alana and Jasper. He could hear her thanking both Alice and Jasper for letting her stay and apologising for any trouble she may have caused. _Typical Bella_, thought Edward.

He stepped a little closer, watching her face closely so he could gauge her reaction. She looked in his direction then. She blinked before an angry expression took over her striking face, anger and something else he couldn't quite read.

Alice, Alana and Jasper looked between the pair before they walked off, oh so tactfully giving the pair some alone time. Bella looked him up and down once before turning to leave. Instinctively, he reached out and took her arm. She tried to tug away but he held her firmly.

He turned her to face him, he could see tears welling in her eyes and he felt like he could cry too, knowing it was his entire fault. She looked at him for a second longer before trying to pull away again. He took this as a cue to talk to her as she obviously did not plan on spending time with him for long.

"I'm sorry," he chocked out. He didn't know where his voice had gone but it had abandoned him in his time of need. He cleared his throat before repeating his previous words and a somewhat more audible level. He saw her face momentarily soften before she recomposed her mask

"What for?" she asked, just as quietly as he had done.

"Everything," he replied, his voice once again failing him. He cleared his throat again with irritation. He saw some of the anger flea her eyes.

She nodded once and looked in the direction of Alice and Jasper.

He took her moment of silence as a go ahead to continue "I'm sorry for every time I was an idiot, for all the hurt I caused you, for every single time I was an asshole when we were growing up." He didn't dare to look her in the face but carried on nevertheless, hoping she was listening and knew how much he really meant what he was saying "I treated you badly when we were teens and I'm so, so sorry about everything that I ever did. I know words are cheap but I really mean it. I know now what a massive mistake I made to throw away somebody as wonderful as you. You were a true friend and I threw you away." He paused as he tried to catch his voice again; it had been trailing off as he spoke. Whether it was due to nerves or emotion he had no idea. "And I'm sorry for not recognising you a few months ago. You've changed so much but I should've recognised you, you're still Bella after all"

He nervously glanced in her direction for a second to see her staring at her with wide, teary eyes. He smiled nervously and she returned the gesture, albeit, it was a very weak, sad smile, but it was a smile all the same.

"I've changed a lot," she croaked "I'm not surprised you didn't recognise me"

He nodded once, breathing out a silent sigh of relief.

"Well, I am sorry all the same,"

They stood in an awkward silence for a moment before Edward tried to ease the mood a little.

"So, how've you been?" he practically whispered.

She hesitated for a moment before smiling awkwardly and answering.

"I've been fine, thank you," she responded quietly "And you?"

"Oh, I've been … fine" he lied, smiling weakly at her.

He was about to ask her how work was going, however feeble that attempt at conversation may seem it was better than nothing. However, he was stopped why Ciara came bounding up to Bella in a tipsy stupor and pulled her in for a tight hug.

Bella hugged her back, slightly wearily and then pulled away slightly.

"I thought you weren't coming!" Ciara said, slurring her words ever so slightly.

"Yeah, I didn't think so either," Bella replied, steadying her as she wobbled on the spot slightly.

"Well, you're here now. Isn't that good?" Ciara giggled.

Bella agreed with a nod of her head and then smiled at Edward awkwardly and headed towards the kitchen, ready to get away from all her tipsy friends.

She poured herself a drink of wine, and hell did she need it. She couldn't believe her eyes when she turned around to see Edward. She hadn't thought much about him since she had last seen him and it was a shock to see him right there in front of her.

She laughed at herself. Hell, that was one big lie. She hadn't stopped thinking about him since he had left. She had tried, really she had. Every time she would find herself thinking about him she would remind herself about Connor, the wonderful man that she was with. Usually, though it just made her feel guilty. He felt so much for her yet sometimes she felt as if she was using him. She felt like she was using him as a distraction. And it felt awful .She did have feelings for him, yes. She also enjoyed spending time with him but she couldn't help but feel that this relationship was relatively one sided. And she was not the one putting in the effort.

Seeing Edward here now, it made her feel like it had 6 weeks previously. Confused, angry, rejected, unworthy yet she felt happy to see him, even if it was only for an hour or two until he left and retreated to his lovely new life never to think of her again.

She sighed, downing the last of her wine and pouring herself another glass.

"You want to slow up on that," a velvety voice came from the doorway. She jumped slightly, causing her to spill some of her wine over the counter. "Sorry," Edward muttered.

He walked over to the counter and took the cloth she had picked up from her hands. He began to clean up the spilt wine, not saying a word as he did. Once finished, he rinsed the cloth through and placed it back where she had taken it from and turned to face her.

"Thank you," she muttered, still reluctant to meet his eyes.

"You're welcome," he replied, sighing slightly.

He hated this; the formality, the unfamiliarity and the distance that was now between them. What was worse, he knew he had put it there.

He looked back over at her, she was leaning against the opposite counter and she was looking at the floor. She looked so shy, so vulnerable. She wasn't normally like this, was she? He would've thought that she would have grown out of her shyness, what with being a model and being in the public eye. Granted, she wasn't exactly a household name, but he had heard from his parents that she was quite popular with fashion magazines and the photographer in the world.

"Are you always this quiet?" he asked, apologising when he had realised what had just slipped out. He apologised immediately before she smiled a little, letting him know he was forgiven.

"Sometimes," she replied, she looked him in the eye for a little longer than before "why?"

He shrugged, seeming to sense her growing comfort. "Well, I guess I thought you would've grown out of being the quiet little shy girl, you know what with being a model and all."

He hoped that he hadn't just arranged his own funeral. Why was it he said stupid stuff around her? He was always so smooth around others.

To his relief, she laughed quietly. Her musical laugh just as he remembered. At least there's something left of the old Bella, he found himself thinking.

"So you thought I would be some kind of stuck up cow?" she asked. He panicked for a moment, before seeing the playful expression she wore and smiled slightly.

"No," he answered, smiling crookedly "I just thought maybe you would be very confident and you wouldn't be one to get all quiet and reserved when faced with a blast from the past, however unpleasant that blast may be," he replied with a joking tone but with a slightly undertone of seriousness.

She smiled weakly and picked up the glass that held the remains of her wine. She took a sip, and he watched her as she tipped he head back slightly and licked her lips once she was finished. He forced himself to pay attention to her and not her lips as she began to talk.

"Actually, I do have much more confidence, I do all sorts of thing I would never dream of doing if I didn't have. Yet, I am still the quiet Bella inside. I just need the right conditions." She took one last sip of her wine before placing it in the sink and striding out of the kitchen, leaving Edward to think alone for a while. She found Alice talking to a tipsy Abigail and joined in their conversation.

Edward stood in the kitchen alone for a while, thinking about what had just happened. In a way, it had been a success; she had not thrown anything at him. On the other, she had walk away after what had meant to be a light hearted comment. Although, something about the expression she was wearing as she left made him think she had not been offended. What _had _she left? Did she not want to carry on the conversation? Granted, it was a little awkward, but the comfort levels were growing with every word, so why leave?

He shook his head and focused as Jasper entered the room. He greeted Edward quietly and poured himself drink. Edward noticed he was keeping away from the alcohol, maybe he wanted to keep a clear head so he could make sure nothing goes wrong, what with a house full of drunken people.

"How did it go?" Jasper inquired, leaning against the counter next to Edward.

Edward shrugged, a satisfied smile playing on his lips "It went okay,"

"Just okay?" Jasper repeated, smiling slightly

"Well, nothing is in concrete but at least I have a chance to turns thins around now," he said, he opened the fridge and got out a banana "I mean, I wouldn't say we're on good terms now, but she knows how sorry I am and hopefully, she's on the way to forgiving me."

Jasper nodded, "She did look pretty happy when she left."

Edward stifled a crooked grin and took a bite out of the banana.

He talked to Jasper for a while longer before they went through to the living room. Bella was talking to Matt in a far corner and Edward couldn't help but felt a pang of jealousy. He stopped himself before he could march over there and tell Matt to back off. Bella was not his, he told himself. They were barely on good terms, they talked for about half and hour in the past 13 years. And, of course, she was with somebody else.

He shook his head and walked over to Alice, who was still talking to Ciara.

…………..

Meanwhile, Connor kissed his mum goodbye and closed the door behind him. He walked around to his car and got in. He looked at the time on his phone, 10 o'clock. He had stayed later than he had planned. He dialled Bella's number and waited for her to pick up.

"Hello?" her musical voice filled his hears. He could hear people talking in the background and the faint hum of music playing.

"Hey," he said, smiling into the phone. "How are you?"

"Fine, thank you. And you?"

"I'm good," he said "You still at Alice's?"

"Yeah," she replied "how did it go with your mum?"

"Well," he replied "I'm going to come down for a bit, okay?"

It was quiet on her end of the phone momentarily before she replied.

"Yeah, sure"

"Okay, I'll be there in about 20 minutes, okay?"

"Okay, bye"

He bid goodbye to her before he hung up and started his car, making his way towards Alice and Jasper's apartment.

……………

Bella put her phone in her pocket and went through to the kitchen. She poured herself yet another glass of wine.

"You really should stop with that stuff," Edward said as she was about to take a sip.

She looked at him, then at the glass again. Sighing, she poured it down the sink and took a can of Pepsi out of the fridge. She took a sip and looked over at him, shooting a quick thank you smile in his direction.

"I don't normally drink like that, y'know" she told him, not wanting him to think she was some kind of drunk. "I guess it's just… everything,"

Edward smiled "yeah, I understand."

Alice came through and smiled at them both, grabbing herself a Pepsi.

"Who was on the phone?" Alice asked Bella

"Connor," she said quietly, avoiding Edward's eye

"What did he want?" Alice raised her eyebrow

"He just left his mum's, he's on his way here for a while," she replied quietly,

"Is he staying the night with you or are you going back to his place?"

"I don't know, it depends on whether he has work tomorrow, I guess."

Bella looked at Edward, he was staring intently at the wall to his right and she noticed that he was gripping the counter with such force that his knuckles were turning white.

"If he's coming, then why doesn't he take you back to your place?" Edward asked, Bella and Alice didn't notice the sharp edge to his tone.

"Well, actually," Bella bit back "I _was _going to leave with him, whether I stay at his or not"

Alice looked between the pair nervously, "No, Bella, you don't need to leave. We need to go through some things tomorrow morning anyway, y'know for your shoot with that magazine? We've got some clothes you can change into here, it would be silly to go home only to come back."

Bella agreed, thanking Alice. She brushed off the thanks and simply walked off towards the living room. Bella smiled at Edward awkwardly once again before following her, not wanting to be around Edward for much longer. What with him just then?

She began to talk to Makayla, and Edward Lucas, until Bella saw Connor coming through the door. Edward watched as Connor closed the door and strode up to Bella. _What a stupid grin _Edward thought to himself. He watched Connor with a critical eye, eager to pick faults.

He watched as he wrapped his arm around Bella and gave her a kiss. He watched as she smiled at Connor and he smiled back, hugging each other.

Bella caught his eye and her smile instantly faded. Connor followed her gaze and locked eyes with Edward, anger filling his eyes. Edward smiled nervously at him, hoping he would see it as a peace making gesture. Unfortunately, it didn't work out that way and the angry Connor, glaring, started to march towards Edward. He must know the deal between the two then.

Connor shook off a protesting Bella and was in front of Edward's face within a few seconds.

"What're you doing here?" he spat

Edward looked at him calmly, not wanting to make a scene. He was about to answer but Bella cut him short. She was obviously just as opposed to a scene as Edward was.

"He's visiting Jasper and Alice, he's not staying long" she told Connor, pulling at his arm, trying to get him to leave Edward be.

Connor opened his mouth to carry on his assault, his expression suggesting he was about to shout, but Jasper stood between the pair.

"Cool it, man" he said to Connor, pushing him backwards slightly to distance him from Edward "he isn't doing any harm."

"please, Connor," Bella pleaded, "just leave it, okay?"

Connor looked at Bella, melting at the sight of her pleading, distressed expression and then sighed, turning to glare at Edward one final time before marching off to the kitchen in search of some beer.

The three left watched them go; as did the rest of the room (Bella's attempts at not creating a scene apparently had not worked).

Bella thanked Jasper and smiled apologetically at Edward before following Connor into the kitchen where he sat on the counter with a can of beer in his hands, staring defiantly at the wall.

"What was that?" Bella asked him calmly

"What do you mean?" he bit back, obviously still angry

"Why did you confront him like that? He wasn't doing any harm,"

"Wasn't doing any harm? Bloody hell, Bella, I would've thought you would be the first person to say he'd done some harm!" he shouted back

Bella glared at him, "That's in the past, Connor" she snapped, trying to keep her voice even "and even if it wasn't, it doesn't matter. This isn't your battle to fight, it's mine."

Connor laughed sarcastically at her "Well, excuse me for trying to be there for you!"

"_Being there for me _doesn't include trying to start fights with people from my past! If you wanted to help tonight, you would've just ignored him. You would have let us get on with our night!" she raised her voice. She was well aware that the now quieter living room could hear every word of their disagreement.

He stood quietly for a moment, he took the last swig of his can – which had gone down extremely quickly by his standards – and threw it in the bin before turning to the still angry Bella.

"Well, I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I ruined your night by caring about you, and your feelings, and not just letting some git who treated you like rubbish turn up in your life and hurt you again." He looked her up and down once before storming out of the kitchen and down the hallway. The front door slammed angrily in his wake.

Bella sighed in frustration, whipping away a stray tear. The people in the next room slowly began to talk again as she stood silently in the kitchen.

What had she done?

Connor didn't deserve that, he was only trying to help. She knew that, she knew he was doing what he thought was best for her. He knew how much she had been hurt and was only trying to prevent that happening again. And how did she respond? She hurt him. Badly.

She ran a hand through her hair and slumped against the counter. She looked at the opposing wall, just as Connor had done minutes before, and tired to stop the tears from falling.

The people in the next room all began to talk again, some gossiping about what had just happened, some being more considerate and finding other conversation topics. Alice went through to the kitchen to comfort her while Jasper began to bid goodbye to all the departing guests. Edward, meanwhile, sat on the sofa, staring at his hands and thinking about what had just happened and how it was his entire fault.

He was so absorbed in his own guilt that he didn't notice when everyone had left and Jasper began to clean the place up, black bag in hand. He didn't notice when Jasper said goodnight to him and went to bed, he didn't notice Alice do the same. But what he did notice is when a tear-stained Bella came through shortly after Alice. She looked over at him and he felt yet another stab of guilt. _Look what I've done to this beautiful woman, _he thought.

"I'm sorry," he choked out, looking her in the eye.

She nodded her head and smiled at him sadly, he hoped this meant he was forgiven, or maybe she didn't blame him as much as she should? Whatever it meant, he could see no anger in her eyes, only sadness. This made him feel even worse.

He smiled back at her, mirroring her sadness.

They looked at one another for a moment longer before Bella's voice filled the silent room.

"Night, Edward" she said before she turned around and departed the room, leaving him and his thoughts to spend some quality time together.

**Was that what you were expecting? DRAMA.**

**Leave a thought?**

**Remember, preview for all reviewers. =)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed, hopefully you all got your previews. =)**

The next morning Edward woke to the sound of Jasper knocking on his door.

"Hey, Edward, you awake?" he called through the door

Edward rubbed his eyes and blinked, trying to get used to the light that now attacked his eyes. He stood up slowly, walking to the door and opening it to see a fully dressed and coffee brandishing Jasper.

Jasper handed him the coffee and walked through to the kitchen. Edward followed, eager to see Bella. He needed to know whether she was okay. Well, obviously she would not be dandy but he just had to see her.

Jasper handed him a plate of toast and he sat down, quickly scanning the room for any signs of Bella.

"They're not here," Jasper told him, watching as he searched the room.

"Oh," Edward simply said, the disappointment clear in his voice

"They'll be back," Jasper assured him, "They've just gone to get some things for the latest shoot."

"I take it they go shopping a lot, then?" Edward asked, seeming more relaxed than he had been

Jasper nodded, "All the time," he took a sip of his own coffee before continuing "You should see the size of their wardrobes, _crazy._"

They both chuckled at the thought.

"Don't they ever run out of room?" Edward asked sceptically. He never did get the fixation women held with shopping. Yes, it was nice to buy some new clothes once a while, but excessive amounts of shopping seemed completely alien to Edward.

Jasper shook his head, "They give all the clothes they don't need anymore to charity. Every few weeks, they go through their wardrobes and sort out what they won't be needing and put it in a bag. They then take that bag to a charity shop." Edward raised his eyebrows. "It was Bella's idea," he explained. "When she first got into this business and began to work with Alice, she felt rather bad about buying all of those clothes and only ever wearing them once. An obscure view for a model, if I may say so, but there we go, that's Bella for you."

Edward chuckled. It certainly was.

They talked for a while longer before the pair each retired to their rooms to get ready for the day. Once showered, washed and dressed, Edward booted up his laptop and checked his email.

His parents had replied to his email, telling him to enjoy his break and asking him if he was okay, evidently worried by his rash change of heart. He sent them a quick reply, not enough to fill them in completely, but enough to appease them. He made no mention of Bella.

He nervously opened an email from Adam, a co-member of 'The Circus is coming'.

_Edward, where the hell were you yesterday, man? You missed practise. _

_We can't practise without you and you've been missing far too many practises recently. _

_Pull yourself together. _

_And answer your god damned phone once in a while!_

_Call me or something,_

_Adam._

Edward cursed under his breath. How could he have forgotten to tell the guys?

What about his phone? What on earth had happened to that?

Adam was right, though. He had been missing too many practises. He had made a habit of going out at night and drowning his sorrows in drink, usually resulting in too big a handover to cope with band practise the next day. He was getting better, though. He knew this wasn't the way to go with life. Alcohol was not the answer.

_Adam, I'm afraid I need to apologise to you. It seems I have neglected to tell you about the short break I recently embarked on. I'm down in London at the moment, visiting Jasper and Alice. _

_I'm sorry for all the inconvenience that will have caused._

_As for my phone, I'm afraid I've temporarily misplaced it. God only knows where it's gone!_

_Anyway, yes, I'm sorry. _

_Edward_

He read it through once. He sighed unhappily, deleting it all and starting afresh, trying to be more casual and dropping the formality that seemed to over take him when he was nervous, angry or apprehensive.

_Hey Adam,_

_Yeah, sorry about that_

_I totally forgot to tell you; I'm in London for a while._

_I've lost my phone so I won't be able to call you._

_Sorry, man._

_Edward._

He pressed send and sighed in relief before attending to the other emails in his box.

The email from Adam reminded him that he needed to write something while he was out here. He had claimed that this trip was an inspiration and creativity inducing one, had he not? He could not return empty handed.

Still, he thought, there would be plenty of time to write another time. He was sure he would find plenty of inspiration as well.

He found writing an excellent way of letting off some steam, of getting your feelings out there without any of the troubles of actually confiding in people. There was no awkwardness as there was when one was confiding in another, there was no loss for words, there was no trust issues. He just wrote what he felt, however cryptic it may be.

He thought about how difficult it would be to write without a guitar with him. What a mistake it had been to leave without one. Perhaps he would just keep to lyrics while he was here. Then again, he always got a tad obsessed with songs when he began them; he would write and write, making the song perfect as he could get it. He usually wouldn't rest until it was complete. That would be problematic.

"Hey, Edward, I'm going down to the store to get some stuff for dinner. I'll be back soon," Jasper told him.

Edward simply nodded, assuring him that he would be fine alone and not to worry.

After he had finished with him laptop, he returned to the living room. It was still considerably messy from the night before and he felt that he should help out a little. He grabbed a black bag that sat half full in the hallway and went around the living room. He picked up empty cans and discarded napkins, dropped food and bottle tops. He collected all the empty glasses and took them through to the kitchen. He washed them up, placing them in the cupboards. He then cleaned up all the discarded cans and left over food in the kitchen.

He took the black bin liner down to the communal bins, just opposite their place. He jammed the bag into the already full bin and slammed the door. He turned around to see Alice's car pulling into the car park. He walked over to greet the pair as they exited the car. Alice greeted him zealously, ever the enthusiast, whereas Bella greeted him slightly more awkwardly. She muttered a quiet hello before smiling at him ever so slightly. It wasn't a smile in which you would greet a friend, maybe more of an acquaintance, but it was something nevertheless.

"Where's Jasper?" Alice asked once they got up to the flat

"He went to get some things from the store," Edward told her

She nodded, picking up her keys, "I'm going to run down there, that way we can buy more than he can carry." She said goodbye and left the nervous pair in a ocean of awkwardness.

They smiled at each other briefly before Edward cleared his throat and began to clean the kitchen once again. He picked up the cloth and started to wipe down the counter with Bella watching him.

She watched in silence as he finished with the cloth and began to put away all of the glasses on the draining board. She assumed that he had washed them earlier.

How strange, she thought, that a young man would be so eager to clean, and what's more, to clean the mess of others! She had yet to be with a man who would clean up their _own _disarray. For example, James would come home at night and fling his shoes on the floor, drop his bag full of work he needed to finish on the coffee table and spend the next few hours lounging on the sofa. She thought of how she was the one who would clean up all of his dirty clothes and how she would be the one to clean the flat. She doubted she would have to do any of that if she were with Edward.

She shook her head; she would _not _let herself begin to think like that. They were barely on speaking terms, this instance proving that point _very _well. She thought for a while longer. What _was _it she wanted from Edward? Did she want her old friend back? Did she miss him? Yes, she did, very much. But would that be enough? Were the feelings she was beginning to develop for him really anything other than what they had used to be?

As she lay in bed the previous night, she had come to the conclusion that what she was feeling for Edward Cullen was simply her previous feelings returning. Growing up, she felt very attached to him, very in tune. He knew her like nobody else. But that wasn't the story now, was it? He hadn't even recognised her when he had seen her last. So, maybe she felt a little more than friendship towards him but that was simply the repercussion of his reappearance. She would get over this, this teenager crush. At least, that's what she tried to tell herself.

She wanted to be on friendly terms with him. She couldn't stand this atmosphere any more. But how could she do that? It would take a lot of work. And a long time. No doubt, he would not be in town for very long. Where was he living now? She had a feeling it was Edinburgh but wasn't sure. What had Carlisle and Esme said last time she had spoken to them? Did he even live near them? They never talked about him on the phone. It would have been too much for both sides of the party.

Edward watched her discretely as she drifted off into her thoughts. As she began to become less in tune with the world and more in tune with her thoughts, the awkwardness slowly evaporated and he found himself working comfortably around her. Why couldn't it be this simple when she way paying attention?

He finished putting every last glass, plate and bowl into the cupboards. He looked around him. Everything was spick and span. _Drat, _he thought, _now what am I going to do? _He didn't know whether he should just walk off, leaving her in her thoughts. Would she be upset to find he had simply walked off? Would she care? He shook his head, he was fussing way too much over the small things.

"Would you like a coffee?" he asked her quietly, trying not to startle her.

Her eyes came into focus and she seemed momentarily confused. He watched as her eyes darted around her surrounds, taking them in. _How cute, _he thought. He mentally scolded himself. They weren't even _friends _– thanks to him – this was no time to be admiring her like that.

"Please," she replied finally, wondering how long she had been away with the fairies.

He nodded, flicking on the kettle and getting out two mugs.

"Sugar?" he asked.

"Half," she replied, smiling politely. Edward noticed how the awkwardness had also come to join them for a coffee. _Typical, _he thought.

He made the coffee and handed it to her; she thanked him quietly and took a sip. They stood for a while before either said anything.

"So, how's it been going with work?" he asked, He mentally cursed himself after he had. What a stupid question!

She smiled politely "Fine, a little tiring sometimes but it's okay." She took another sip. She did not particularly want to talk about work but she could see he was at least trying to ease the tension, which was more than she was doing. "How about you, you're in a band, right?"

He nodded, "Yeah, 'The Circus is coming'," he looked around the kitchen for a moment, trying to think of something to say. "Have you heard of them?"

"The name rings a bell but I'm not sure I would know one of your songs if I heard it," she admitted. "I think matt's a fan, y'know from last night? He probably mentioned them to me sometime."

Edward nodded. He didn't want to think about last night, about seeing her happy with Connor, about how had caused a massive argument between the couple and may have ruined their happiness. No, he didn't want to think about that.

He couldn't just let that comment hang though.

"Look, I'm sorry about last night," Edward started, Bella started to object but he cut her short. "No, don't. I'm sorry; I didn't mean to cause such uproar. If I'd have known that I would cause that I would have probably stayed away," He looked down at the floor, that comment was very true. He would never want to jeopardise Bella's happiness, even if it did include that _Connor _bloke.

"You didn't know it would happen, nobody did. I didn't even think he was coming." She said quietly.

"Still, I probably shouldn't have come here, it was a mistake." He took another thoughtful sip of coffee, "I've caused nothing but trouble since I got here. I turned up out of the blue, dropping Alice and Jasper in at the deep end, I ruined their party, I caused arguments between you and your boyfriend _and _my band mates are probably pissed as _hell _at me right now…. I shouldn't have come."

He took another sip of his coffee. He knew he sounded pathetic, he knew he sounded like a twerpy teenager who felt sorry for them self. He just couldn't help it, it was how he felt.

"Well, I'm glad you here," she said quietly.

His head snapped up, his heart pounding. Her cheeks had reddened; he loved it when she blushed, it was a reminder of the old Bella. It was also undeniably beautiful.

"Really?" he choked, not sure if he had heard her right.

"Yes," she admitted before smiling awkwardly and going to her room, leaving him in a daze.

He stood thinking for a while. What had she meant by that? Was she simply glad that they had a chance to be friends again? Or was it more than that? Would it be more than that?

He stood in a daze for some time, only to be brought out of his questioning thoughts by the return of Alice and Jasper.

"Hey, you alright?" Alice asked him as she saw his dazed expression.

He nodded, trying to focus on the real world, "I'm fine," he assured them. They put their bags on the counter and Alice began to pack things away. Edward, in need of something to do, offered to help her, she accepted graciously and handed him a bag full of groceries.

"Has somebody cleaned up?" Alice asked some time later,

"Yeah, I just thought it would help out a little, y'know make up for the short notice thing." Edward said

Jasper shook his head, "You didn't have to do that, man, but thanks anyway." They grinned at each other, they both knew that cleaning wasn't either of their forte's.

"I didn't mind," Edward told him, Jasper laughed, as if to say _as if you didn't. _

They grinned at each other once again before they moved through to the living room to watch some TV. Alice came through soon after, holding a back bag and a sweeping brush. She took one sweeping look around the room before hey eyes settled on Edward.

"You did in here, too?" she asked,

Jasper laughed, "No, the room cleaned itself," both he and Edward laughed at this but were soon silenced by Alice's glare. "Sorry, Ali," Jasper said eventually,

She ignored his apology but he assumed that he was forgiven as she stopped glaring at him. She turned to Edward, "Thank you, you didn't have to you know." She told him, putting down the bag on the coffee table and balancing the brush again the wall before sitting down on one of the sofas. "We really don't mind you being here, it's actually quite nice to have some company other than that big old thing," she said, pointing at Jasper with a playful smirk on his face.

Jasper looked at her as if to say '_what've I done now?' _and she simply giggled before prancing off into the kitchen. Jasper shook his head and rolled his eyes but the love in his eyes showed it all; he loved that damned pixie's stupid jokes.

Bella appeared some time later to watch TV with them; she smiled at them enthusiastically as she sat down. Edward was filled with hope; maybe they could be friends again. Maybe she meant what she had said before?

When the program they had been watching, they went through the menu for something else.

"Nothing," Jasper said, exasperatedly "We have _how many _channels and we _still _have nothing to watch! Crazy," he muttered.

"Why don't we put a film on?" Bella suggested, not willing to watch 'Desperate Housewives'.

Jasper nodded and went up to the bookcase which held all of the CDs and DVDs that they owned. He took out a basket and put it on the coffee table. They all looked at its contents. Bella frowned,

"So, it's action movies or action movies then, huh?" she said, they all laughed at her.

"You don't like action movies?" Edward asked, this didn't surprise him all that much, she had never been into that kind of thing when they were growing up.

"Well, they're okay I guess," she sighed, "I just don't really see the point in them, it's just explosion are explosion, car chase after car chase. Don't you ever get bored of it?" She asked the boys

They exchanged a look and then laughed, "No," Edward replied,

She sighed; well, that was to be expected. "Of course you don't," she muttered

"What's that's supposed to mean?" Jasper chuckled

"Well, they're aimed at men, aren't they?" Alice chipped in

The boys frowned at them; what were they on about?

Bella rolled her eyes, "Take this for example, 'Fast and Furious', I had to go and see that with one of my friends once and y'know what? It was filled with oscillating women wearing the bare essentials - and I _mean _the bare essentials. There were women making out in every corner to fuel the male population's strange obsession with homosexual behaviour in women and I _swear _the main character slept with like 20 girls!"

Bella finished her rant and sighed, they were fighting to keep a straight face, she could tell.

"Interesting view, Bells" Jasper managed to get out. Edward couldn't seem to hold it in any longer as he flopped back against the sofa and started laughing uncontrollably. He was soon followed by Jasper. Bella looked over at Alice who was watching the pair with an amused expression on her face.

"Men," she sighed,

Bella nodded before getting up and following Alice into the kitchen where they made themselves something to eat and sat talking for a while. Not long after, they heard the sound of gunshot and cars. They rolled their eyes; they were so male.

"So," Alice said after a while, "What are you going to do about Connor?"

Bella sighed; what _was _she going to do about Connor?

I don't know," she admitted

"Do you want to sort it?" Alice asked,

Bella blushed, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Are you sure that you and Connor dating is a good idea?"

Bella was about to shoot her down and tell her of course it was a good idea but stopped herself. Was it a good idea?

Alice took her silence as her answer, and hugged Bella tightly.

"Don't worry, we'll sort this out," Alice told her, "You just need to establish your feelings for him,"

Bella thought for a moment, what did she really feel for Connor? Did she love him or was he just a distraction?

"Well," she started, "I _do _like him"

Alice nodded, "How much?"

"I don't know," Bella admitted,

Alice sighed; she may have to be more to the point. "Are you happy with Connor?"

Bella put her head in her hands, "I was,"

"What changed?" Alice probed. She _would _make her realise this for herself. She couldn't just be told. "Has there been anything or _anybody _that's changed it for you?" she asked, stressing the 'anybody' part.

Bella was silent; tears were welling in her eyes. Alice saw these and sighed again, pulling Bella into a tight hug. She would have to leave this for another time, when they were alone. She couldn't have Bella crying her eyes out with Edward in the next room. That would only make things worse.

"Come on, let's go and get a coffee or something. What about that frappe thing you like from Starbucks?" Alice asked gently.

Bella stood up, "I'm not a child," she snapped at Alice before she grabbed her coat and headed out the door, followed by Alice.

20 minutes later, they were sat at a corner table in Starbucks. Luckily, because of the time, it was empty, save an old woman at the counter and a man on the phone at the other end of the room.

Alice sat down with the drinks and handed Bella her frappe. She took it and took a large sip from it, sighing.

"Sugar, that's what I needed," she said glumly.

Alice sat in silence for a while before she repeated her earlier question. "What changed?"

Bella glared at her, "is that the only reason you brought me here?"

"Would you rather it be here or at my place with Edward in the next room?" Alice replied calmly.

"What's Edward got to do with this?" Bella snapped, averting her eyes.

"You tell me," Alice countered.

Bella sighed. She obviously wasn't going to get away with this, she may as well get it over with.

"I don't loved Edward," she said firmly.

"but you don't love Connor either?"

Bella was silent once again,

"Thought so," Alice said quietly but later apologised when she received a livid glare from Bella. "So, if you don't like him then why are you with him?" she asked, taking a sip of her drink

"I never said I didn't _like_ him," Bella defended

Alice rolled her eyes, "Okay, how _much _do you _like _him?"

Bella looked around sheepishly, "I guess the same as I did when you were trying to get us together." She admitted "In face, probably less," she added as an afterthought.

Alice sighed once again, "So, let's say that you guys aren't together. Would you get together with him now, based on how much you feel for him?"

Bella raked her hand through her hair, frustrated. She took a calming breath and tried to answer Alice as evenly as possible. "No," she said simply, tears welling in her eyes.

"Do you think that if Edward hadn't turned up and made you feel so rejected, that you and Connor would be together?" Alice probed,

Bella shook her head, the tears spilling onto her face.

What had she done? She had gotten into this for all the wrong reasons. She had hurt a friend. She had used a friend. She may well have lost a friend.

Alice put her arm around Bella's shoulder, trying to comfort her. Once Bella had pulled herself together she took another sip of her drink and looked over at Alice.

"What?" Bella asked once she saw Alice's business-like expression.

"You know what you have to do," Alice said.

Bella sighed. Yes, she did.

She had to end it.

She couldn't carry on this way and it wasn't fair on Connor.

At that moment in time, Edward didn't even come into it. All that came into it was the need to stop a friend hurting, to stop a friend being used. To try and preserve the scraps of their friendship that was left.

She would do it now, she decided. She couldn't wait any longer.

She stood up and said goodbye to Alice before striding out of the doors and heading straight over to Connor's flat to put a stop to this madness.

**Review, review, review! **

**Reviewers get a preview of chapter 8 =)**

**PROBLEM: **

**Bad news I'm afraid. My laptop is dying. =( I truly loved that big old piece of rubbish and now, we have to take it back! It cuts out every 20 minutes or so and it's annoying as hell, to say the least. It also means that I regularly use bits of writing that I've written. Say I saved what I wrote 10 minutes ago and have written a fair amount since then and BAMM… gone. Depressing, right? **

**Silver lining IS: I managed to backup some of my files onto a disk, SO my stories aren't lost and there WILL be updates. But still, there's a slight issue: I have to write on the family desktop. This is all fine and dandy when I'm alone in the house, but not so good when my dad, mum and brother are roaming the vicinity of the house and demanding to use the already overused family computer. Plus, another complication to be added to that; they know nothing of my writing habits. Nothing. As far as they're concerned, whenever I'm on my computer I'm on some time wasting social network chatting to friends. They've never asked whether I write and I've never told them. Simple. **

**SO, the point to all that unnecessary drivel up there; I don't know when I'll get a chance to write. The next update might be in 3 days time, it might not. I'm just warning you guys, I have no idea how much time I will be able to spend on here and how much I will actually get to write…**

**Sorry!**

**SO! After that essay, (yeah, I hate long author notes too!) REVIEW!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Thanks to all who reviewed, added or read this story so far =)**

**Guess what? My dad took me as soon as possible to get a new laptop! How awesome is that? Only thing was we ended up at the shop three times that day with three different laptops… =/ Bad times. **

**I made sure I got this out as soon as possible cause recently my obsession with writing has been getting worse. Haha, I've neglected all my homework all holiday and have written etc. instead… Bad idea cause now I have 3 days to do what should be 2 weeks worth of homework AND revision for a weeks worth of exams starting Monday. Boy am I going to have fun!**

**Don't worry though, I love writing way too much to do homework over this. =) **

Bella walked down the street to Connor's flat slowly. Even though she knew she had to do this she was dreading it. She would do it, she knew, but it would be hard. She didn't want to hurt him and yet she couldn't stay with him. That would just be hurting him more and she just didn't feel enough for him to stay in a relationship with him.

She knocked on his door and stood, waiting for him to open it. Her heart was pounding profusely in her chest and she was trying as hard as she could to control her breathing. She heard somebody bustling around on the other side of the door and fought to compos herself before Connor saw her.

The door swung open and they looked at each other for moment before Connor stepped aside to let her in. She smiled nervously at him and he smiled back, the smiled not touching his eyes.

He could tell something was wrong; there was sadness in her eyes and a certain sense of determination dominated her features. He sighed; bad news.

"Hey," he said, smiling awkwardly.

"Hi," she said quietly, the voice she used when she was nervous.

"Do you want a drink?" he offered, trying to make the atmosphere less tense.

She shook her head, "No thanks," she sighed, knowing she would have to do this sometime, "Connor, I have to tell you something," she started, she saw his face fall. He knew what was coming.

He went through to the living room and sat on the sofa, he put his head in his hands. He knew this was coming. Was it about the argument the night before? He knew he shouldn't have done that and he probably would have had a better control of his emotions if he hadn't had any alcohol but he couldn't change that now, could he?

In honesty, he hadn't seen all that much wrong with his original action. There was the guy who had hurt his girlfriend no end and he was supposed to smile and talk to him? So maybe he shouldn't have been so forward with his actions but we all make mistakes, right?

He knew he had been in the wrong for shouting at Bella. He knew she had her own way of doing things. She was very independent and stubborn. She wasn't the type to go for a guy that makes her business their business. She was far too independent to let somebody else, boyfriend or not, to fight her own battles. He knew that, so why had he done what he had the day before?

"I'm sorry," he said eventually, his voice sounding completely deflated and dejected. She sat down beside him and took his hand.

"Don't be sorry, you have nothing to be sorry about," she told him,

"Last night?"

She sighed, "I understand why you did it."

He stared at her, his eyes full of sadness, "Then why this?"

She looked at the floor for a while, trying to figure out a way to say this. How could she tell somebody that being with them was a mistake without hurting them? Answer: you couldn't.

"I-I," she choked "I'm sorry,"

He stood up furiously; he started to pace the room in frustration. He ran his hands through his hair before he turned to face her, his eyes even worse than before.

"Do I even mean _anything _to you?" he demanded, his voice broken and angry,

"Of course you do!" she cried,

"But not enough, right?"

"Do you want me to lie to you?" she asked quietly. When he didn't answer, she carried on, "Do you want me to stay with you and let you waste your life on me even though I could never give you the love you've given me?"

"Being with you wouldn't be a waste," he replied quietly, almost silently.

"Do you want to live your life in a relationship with somebody whose heart isn't in it?"

He frowned at her, "So we've been a mistake right from the start?" he demanded, running his hands through his hair again. He seemed angry again. She sighed; there really was no way of not hurting him, was there?

"I didn't say that," she replied, looking at the floor.

"Just answer the question," he spat

She sighed, putting her head in her hands, "No, I wanted to be with you at first,"

"At first?" he repeated, laughing sarcastically, "I didn't have you down as somebody who got bored of people quickly. I mean, you stayed with James for ages and he was as boring as hell!"

Glaring at him, she stood up "Don't," she spat,

"Don't what? Tell the truth?" he mocked, walking off,

She followed him, "No, don't do that!" she snapped,

"Do what?" he replied,

"Say things about others so that you feel big. Its low; Connor, you and I both know that."

"So, I'm not allowed to tell the truth now?" he shouted

"Of course you are! You asshole!" she shouted, finally losing her temper "but that's not the truth! You're just looking for somebody to slate because you're sore that you got dumped"

"Oh, I'm dumped? I don't believe you got to that part yet, you were too busy trying to play the 'it's not you, it's me' card," he said sarcastically.

"You know what? It _was _me, but now I'm thinking I'm _glad _we're over. I couldn't put up with an ass like you for very long!" She screamed, his little sarcastic laughs and comments getting to her.

"Oh, it would be _you _putting up with _me _would it? And you think I'm the only one who gets it wrong?" he shouted

"Of course not!" she spat, trying to calm her temper.

"Well guess what, princess," he said sarcastically, "you're not little Miss Perfect. You're not the most important person in the world. You're not the only one with feelings!" he yelled.

She was about to reply but she heard a hesitant knock on the door and, scowling at Connor one last time, left to go and answer it.

"It's my place, I'll answer the god damned door," he spat as he pushed past her when she reached the door.

"Is everything okay, only we heard some raised voices," an elderly looking man asked once he had opened the door. He was probably a neighbour Bella decided.

"Everything's fine," Connor said, smiling sweetly, "my ex is just being difficult," he informed the man who glanced nervously around the door to see a furious Bella.

"Well, I wouldn't worry, sir, I'm leaving now." She spat, pushing her way past Connor and onto the street. She marched down the street, heading back to Alice's place for some serious counselling.

Connor glared after her and then closed the door violently in the old man's face. He marched through to his living room and punched the wall. What the hell had he just done? Why had he said all of that? What the heck was _wrong _with him?

He wouldn't be apologising though, no, she shouldn't have used him like that. She should have gotten ridden of him the moment she had gotten bored. It would have saved them both a lot of bother.

He sat on his sofa and put his head in his hands. Why not him? They had great together, he had thought. They always had a good time; they were always laughing and joking. They usually got on great. In fact, the argument the night before had been the first disagreement between the two in the 6 weeks or so that they had been together. What was with that? What had changed her opinion of him so suddenly? Had she got somebody else? Had she lied when she had said she had any feelings for him initially? Had he just been a little fun? He hoped not. Hell, he hoped not.

……………………………

Alice walked through the door of her flat alone. Bella had gone to talk to Connor and she had been left alone to finish her coffee.

"I'm home," she called into the living room where Edward and Jasper were still watching silly action movies. She rolled her eyes; she wouldn't get either of them away from that TV set for at least another two hours and with Bella gone out, it would be a lonely two hours.

She would call Bella in the morning, she decided. After all, she wouldn't see her tonight. She did have her own place.

She went through to sit with Edward and Jasper, not wanting to spend the next few hours alone and bored. At least here she could be bored in the company of others.

"Where's Bella?" Edward asked as she sat down. He had told himself that he would not be constantly asking about her like a love sick teenager but he was, so far, failing at that. He told himself that he was just protective of her because they had been close but even he knew it was more than that. She had no idea what effect she had on him. And as far as he was concerned, the chances are she never would.

"She went to Connor's," Alice said, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible. They didn't need to know what was going on and it wasn't really her place to tell them.

"They're talking now?" Jasper asked, sounding slightly surprised. He turned to Edward, "Bella never could hold a grudge,"

"No, she couldn't," Edward agreed, trying to hold the disappointment from his voice. He couldn't let himself be upset about this. She was with Connor and he would have to face it. Although, what he's seen of him so far, he hasn't made her too happy.

They watched the rest of the film in near silence and once it was finished they all went to bed. Still, two hours later, Edward found himself unable to sleep and got up, heading for the living room. He turned the TV on quietly and sat watching for a while until he heard a quiet knock on the door.

He went towards the door, wondering who on earth it could be in the middle of the night.

He froze in shock when he opened the door to a tired, tearstained Bella but quickly recovered himself. Her ushered her in and lead her to the sofa.

"What happened, Bella?" he asked in a worried tone, taking in the look of utter misery that masked her features. "Bella?" he asked again. His heart was beating wildly and he was shaking slightly. He was so worried about her. He couldn't stand to see her like this; he couldn't stand to see the misery on her beautiful face.

"Bella, what happened?" he repeated, but more urgently than before.

"I'm a horrible person," she said quietly, so quietly it was barely audible. He could see the tears were starting to fall again and pulled her into his arms, cradling her against his chest while he tried to comfort her.

"Shh, no honey, you're not," he told her, stroking her back rhythmically in what he hoped was a relaxing gesture.

"I am," she cried, her body starting to shake with the violence of her tears,

"Why would you say that?" he asked, he took her face in his hands and made her look him in the eye, "you're one of the kindest people I know," he said firmly trying to make her realise.

"If you knew what I've done then you wouldn't be saying that," she cried, hugging him tighter.

"What happened, Bella?" he asked in what he hoped what a soothing tone. He was still rubbing her back and the tears were slowly subsiding.

"Connor," she said drearily, the tears obviously tiring her out. Her eyes began to droop and he held her closer.

"What about Connor?" he asked. God, if he'd hurt her then he would kill him. Nobody would ever make Bella feel like this as long as he was around.

"I'm a bad person," she repeated, her voice even more drowsy. Her head fell against his chest as she lost the strength to sit up. She began to drift into sleep, still in his arms.

"You could never be, Bella," he said quietly before she was asleep.

He found himself quiet unable to sleep in his current predicament so he settled, instead, for watching Bella sleep. She was too close for him to sleep. She was in too much pain for him to consider going to sleep. He just couldn't.

…………………………….

Alice padded into the kitchen later than usual that morning, she did not need to be at work that day so she had stayed in bed a while longer, getting a little more sleep than usual.

She froze upon seeing a sleeping Bella in a sleeping Edward's arms. _How the heck did that happen?_ She thought. She went through to the kitchen, not wanting to disturb the pair and made herself a coffee to wake herself up. She couldn't help but worry about what she had just seen though.

How had it gone with Connor? Had they broken up? Was he okay? Was she okay? Why was she so quick to go for Edward when she had said she didn't love him? Gosh, that girl was confusing, she thought.

Alice set about making her breakfast after she had finished her coffee and put the radio on low so she could hear the news without waking up the sleeping pair out there.

………………………….

Bella woke up to hear the sound of the radio. She sat up, confused. She nearly had a fit when she realised where she was and who she was lying on. How the _hell _had that happened? She fought to get the memory back, why was she here?

She remembered leaving Connor's flat utterly fuming and intending to go to Alice's. She then remembered changing her mind because she felt she would then be ruining Alice's evening and she didn't want to be constantly asking people for help. She remembered wandering around for a while. She remembered going to the local park and sitting there alone for a few hours, thinking, crying and cursing herself. When it got too dark and she started to get creped out she had left, returning to her own flat. However, the emptiness of that flat had done nothing for her and she had eventually given up and walked down to Alice's flat. She hadn't realised the time.

She asked herself what happened next but couldn't seem to recall all the details. She remembered that she was a mess. She remembered crying on somebody, obviously Edward. She remembered Edward comforting her and holding her until she stopped crying. She felt a rush of affection for him then. Most men shy away from emotion and tears and yet he had sat with her all night and tried top sort her out. Not that he had had much choice to sit with her all night, judging from the current position she found herself in. That reminded her; she needed to get off of him before he woke up to find her on top of him and staring.

She gently got up and walked through to the kitchen, following the sound of the radio. There she found Alice who, once she saw her, immediately stopped eating her breakfast and rushed to give her a hug. How did she know something was wrong? Her question was answered once she caught sight of her reflection in the mirror hanging on the wall. She looked atrocious.

"Bella, what on earth happened?" Alice asked her urgently,

Bella looked around the kitchen, she walked over to the kettle and started it up. She needed a coffee. She needed the energy,

"Bella?" Alice asked once she had got her coffee fix.

"I did what I needed to," she told her bitterly, thinking of the night before. Her eyes started to smart with tears and she sighed heavily. She had had enough of tears the night before; she didn't want to be a wreck. She wanted to go back to normal but she just couldn't stop herself from feeling absolutely awful and mourning the loss of what she thought was such a good friend.

She felt a hand on her shoulder and turned around to see Edward, she smiled weakly at him and he squeezed her shoulder before using the just boiled water in the kettle to make himself a drink. Bella couldn't help but feel guilty when she saw the massive bags under his astonishing eyes. She hated that she had put them there.

"Thanks," she said to him, walking over to him and hugging him lightly. She could tell by the way his body went rigid that he was surprised but he composed himself quickly and hugged her back, his body relaxing against hers.

"Don't mention it," he said into her hair, the irresistible smell of strawberries hitting him like a wave.

"No, really, thank you. And I'm sorry I kept you up all night," she said, looking at his tired eyes.

He laughed, "You're worried about how tired I am? You should worry about yourself more. How are you?"

She let go of him and returned to her coffee, she shrugged her shoulders lightly and looked into her half empty mug.

"Bella, what did he say?" Alice asked. Both Bella and Edward looked over at her; they had forgotten she was still in the room with them. They had been paying too much attention to each other to notice.

"Stuff," she said quietly, running her little finger around the rim of her mug.

"Why do you think you're a bad person?" Edward asked suddenly,

Bella looked at him, _did I say that? _"Did I?"

"Yes, and you kept on saying something about Connor but you wouldn't tell me what happened," he replied with a worried expression on his face.

"Oh," she simply said

"Are you two over?" Alice asked, going from her previous comment of 'I did what I needed to,'

Edward's head snapped around to Bella, _so that's what was going on? _

"Yes," she said quietly, nodding.

Both Alice and Edward sighed, both moving to pull her into a comforting hug. Edward was about to reach out for her but checked himself, allowing Alice to comfort her. This was not his place. He should leave Alice to do this.

He smiled at Alice one and gently gave Bella's shoulder a squeeze before leaving the room. He went through to his bedroom to get changed into some clean clothes and then left the apartment, he wanted to give them some space and he hadn't done all that much since he had been here. Maybe he could see a little of London, find something to do, meet some new people maybe?

Whatever, he needed to get away from the apartment. He was angry at Connor for hurting Bella like this and couldn't watch her much longer without going to find Connor and giving him a bit of his mind.

He went to a local café and ordered himself lunch. He sat and ate his lunch alone, he then sat and watched the world go by for a while, not wanting to return to the apartment in case he was intruding on something important.

"Hey," Bella's soft voice startled him, she apologised quietly and sat down at the table with him.

"What are you doing h-" I began

"I came to find you, I went to Starbucks first and then here,"

"But how did you know I was here?! He asked, utterly confused. Not that he was complaining, he loved the fact she was here he just didn't understand how she knew he would be here.

She laughed, "Scared of a stalker?" she teased, "Actually, Lucas came around to give Alice something for Jasper, he said that he'd seen you on this road so I thought it was worth a try to come here,"

"Oh," he said. He didn't know what else he could say. He could tell she was trying her best to be sociable and happy but her eyes held nothing but sadness. He wanted to know why she had come here to find him, he appreciated that she was here and was actually overjoyed to see her, he just couldn't understand.

"Why did you leave?" she said suddenly. Moments in silence had passes while they had both been lost in their own thoughts and now, as she voiced her thoughts, she had startled him out of his own.

"What?" he asked momentarily confused.

"Why did you leave the flat earlier? You just left out of the blue," she asked, "I thought maybe I'd done something wrong," she added quietly, looking at the table

"You didn't!" he said, replying a little too quickly and enthusiastically. He smiled awkwardly and she laughed a little. He loved the sound of her laugh, he decided, it was so musical it was hard to resist. They grinned at each other for a moment before she looked away and spoke.

"So," she said casually, "care to enlighten me?" she smiled slightly and he saw how she got tiny dimples in the corner of her mouth when she did so. _Cute,_ he thought. "Edward?" she asked, causing him to snap out of it. He had been staring, he knew by the blush in her cheeks.

"Sorry," he muttered, "what were you talking about?"

She giggled slightly, nearly causing him to drift off again but he caught himself, forcing his mind to pay attention to what was coming out of her mouth instead of just staring at her lips.

"I asked why you left the flat, remember?"

"Oh, yeah," he replied, remembering. "I thought maybe you two would want some private time," he told her, "I didn't want to intrude."

"Oh," she said, slightly puzzled. "Well you wouldn't have been,"

Really? He doubted that.

"Well, I thought I better, you know, just in case."

She nodded, "I suppose I understand that,"

She stood up and he immediately started to panic. Why was she leaving? Didn't she want to be here anymore? Had the staring made her uncomfortable? He mentally snorted, of course it had! Who _wouldn't _be uncomfortable with people sitting there staring at you?

He thought would have thought, though, that a model wouldn't. Then again, she wasn't like any other model he had ever met. Not that he had spent that much time with any models. Maybe it had something to do with the fact she was Bella, he told himself.

But still, he didn't want her to leave. She was looking in the opposite direction while he was blatantly staring at her. He considered asking her to stay but then he would sound like a desperate teenager and he didn't want that.

He would just have to say goodbye.

He hated that thought.

"Do you want a drink?" she asked, turning around to face him.

He stifled a sigh of relied, she wasn't leaving after all. He could spend some time with her.

His face broke into a crooked grin as he realised that she was staying and he relaxed back into his seat. "I'll have an orange," he told her, "tell the guy at the counter to put it on my bill," he assured her.

"No it's okay, I'll-" she started

"Don't be ridiculous," he broke her off. "my bill," he repeated, grinning crookedly again.

She nodded and walked towards the bar. He watched the way she walked, the way her hips swung and the way she held herself as she stood, ordering the drinks. His eyes traced the curves of her body and he couldn't help but like the new Bella. Sure, she was the same old girl inside, but on the outside, she was stunning.

He looked back at the table and mentally scolded himself. He shouldn't be doing this to her, it was disrespectful. He just couldn't help when he was around her though, he was beginning to find her irresistible.

He sighed; this wasn't good. It was one thing to start getting interested in somebody you haven't seen for however many years so quickly but it was another when they were so completely out of your league. He knew that after last night their relationship had taken a step up but even then, they were only just border lining 'friends'. He couldn't let himself do this. He could not fall for Isabella Swan.

………..

"Two oranges, please," she said to the guy at the counter. She leant against the counter, feeling slightly light headed. How had just that smiled made her feel that way? How did he do that? He had _definitely _gotten better looking, if that was even possible. She shook her head, no she would not allow herself to think about him in that way. He would be leaving soon, no doubt, and if she allowed herself to become attached to him in that way then she would just end up being crushed when he goes home and she never hears from him again. No, she wasn't going down that route.

Still, she had to thank him for being there the previous night. What he had done was a truly nice thing and she was going to make sure he knew she was grateful.

"Here you go," the server came back and put two oranges on the counter.

"Thanks," she said

"No, worries," he told her winking, "If you need _anything _please don't hesitate to ask," he told her in what she could only assume was supposed to be a seductive voice. Unfortunately for him, it ended up sounding like he had some kind of throat infection.

She picked up the drinks and turned around, returning to the table, deciding to ignore that last comment. She just hoped, for his own sake, that he hadn't gotten it into his head she was interested in him. He would end up rather disappointed.

"Here you go," she said as she placed the drinks on the table and sat down opposite him, smiling.

"You did put it on my bill, right?" he asked as she took a sip. He knew full well that she didn't like people buying things for her. A lot may have changed about her but this was not one of them and he doubted it ever would be.

She shrugged, glancing back at the man behind the bar with a slightly annoyed expression on her face, "not sure, either way, I didn't pay."

Edward looked over at the guy at the bar who was watching the pair with a slightly annoyed expression on his face. He felt like marching up there and telling that guy to leave Bella alone but he knew that was not his place. Still, he could still toy with this guy. He was obviously annoyed to find that Bella was with another male, whether he thought they were 'together' or not.

He glanced at Bella; she was looking in the opposite direction, out of the window. He then looked over at the employee who was now glaring at him dangerously. Edward smiled as broadly as he could and wiggled his eyebrows at the guy, tilting his head in the direction of Bella. The employee's face soured and he turned away from him, obviously not wanting to give Edward the satisfaction.

_Too late, _he thought. He was still grinning in self satisfaction as Bella turned around.

"What're you grinning about?" she asked him when she saw his expression

"Oh, nothing," he said casually. He took one last swig of his drink and stood. "You ready?" he asked. She nodded her head and stood. Edward paid the bill, smiling in self satisfaction again as he realised that the employee that had been hitting on Bella had made the other employee serve him. How childish, he thought.

He paid the young, acne ridden employee and then lead Bella out of the café and onto the road.

"Where to?" Edward asked her,

"Come on," Bella smiled, grabbing his hand and pulling him along the street.

He followed willingly, smiling like a goof as she pulled him along. The only thing he could think was how childish he was being. He kept on thinking "She's holding my hand!".

He laughed at himself once before quickening his pace to meet hers and they walked down the road towards Bella's secret destination hand in hand.

**Review, review, review!**

**Remember: reviewers get a preview of the next chapter! =)**

…………

**Announcement:**

**Because I'm crazy and apparently don't like the idea of free time, I've signed up for Betaing… =) So, if you're interested, let me know. **


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you to the TWO people who bothered to review my last chapter. =)**

They spent the day wandering around the centre of London until their feet hurt more than they had ever thought imaginable. They wandered around Covent Gardens for a while and sat down for something to eat at one of the stalls. After they had ordered and got their food in front of them, they quickly started talking again.

They were on considerably better terms than they had been and they both hoped that this wasn't a temporary achievement.

They caught the bus to a street about 15 minutes away from Alice's place and about 20 from Bella's and walked the rest. Bella stayed with Edward, planning on taking the route to her house via Alice's so that she wouldn't have to cut the day short just yet.

"Are you staying again tonight?" Edward asked her as they got off the bus.

She shook her head, "I have my own flat to go to," she told him, smiling slightly.

He nodded, _of course she did. _

"Thank you," she said suddenly, filling the temporary silence that had fallen over them. "For last night, I mean,"

He chuckled slightly, "we've already been over this, its fine."

She nodded, "I know but I really am grateful. You didn't have to, you know,"

"I know I didn't have to, but I wanted to." He told her, smiling crookedly "Besides," he continued, somewhat more seriously, "I didn't like seeing you like that,"

She sighed, "Sorry about that. I would've stayed at home but I just needed somebody to talk to. I didn't realise the time."

"No problem," he chuckled.

They stayed silent for a moment before he asked the question he had been dying to ask the whole day.

"If you don't mind me asking, what was the matter?" he asked her quietly, hoping she wouldn't think he was intruding by asking.

She had seen this coming all day and knew she owed him an explanation for what had happened so was well prepared. She would simply tell him the truth.

"Connor and I broke up," she said in a matter-of-fact tone.

He was silent. He was surprised, really. He felt the most curious combination of sympathy for Bella and relief. He was concerned about how she had reacted to this and didn't want her to be distressed in any way. On the other hand, he was oddly glad that she was no longer with that Connor guy, something that he was quite ashamed of. He did not want to be acting like a jealous school child but he just couldn't control his feelings towards the matter.

"Oh," he said finally, unable to think of anything else to say "I'm sorry to hear that," he lied.

"Hmm," she said simply, as if not quite in agreement. "It was bound to happen," she told him, looking in the opposite direction.

He frowned, he had actually thought they were getting on fine, much to his annoyance, "How do you mean?"

She sighed, not sure whether she should tell him this, afraid that his opinion of her would somehow be depleted by this confession. She decided that she would tone down the explanation so that he didn't think she had been using Connor, as she so obviously had been. She was far too ashamed to admit that to anybody, however unintentional it had started out to be, it was still unacceptable.

"I shouldn't have been with Connor," I said quietly, not daring to look at him and staring at my food instead. If he was surprised then he didn't show it

"I'm still not getting you," he said breezily, laughing slightly, "what do you mean you shouldn't have been with him? Didn't you want to be or something?"

She sighed, "No, I did at first. Well, I thought I did. I had liked him for a while but it seems that I didn't like him as much as I had thought,"

She stayed silent; this was hard for her to admit. She hated users and yet here she was confessing to be a one.

"So you broke up with him last night?" Edward asked nonchalantly. She nodded and he couldn't help but feel relived at what she had just told him, despite his many attempts to remain courteous. Something puzzled him though, if she didn't want to be with him then why had the break up affected her in such a way? He decided he would ask another time, not wanting to pry on the subject too long and upset her again.

"So, have you got anything big on at work?" Edward asked casually, leaving Bella rather relieved that the conversation had changed its course before she had to explain what had happened between her and Connor.

"Well, I've got a shoot with '_Cosmopolitan' _tomorrow," she replied, not sure whether that meant anything to him.

He nodded, "I think my mum reads that," he chuckled, "I'll tell her to look out for you,"

Bella smiled, "She probably wouldn't recognize me without all my baby fat and spots,"

Edward chuckled, "You've changed a lot, that's all,"

"By that you mean I'm not as ugly as I used to be," she giggled,

He looked away, uncomfortable, "You weren't ugly," he told her solemnly

She left that comment hanging, wanting to move on and decided to go back to their original subject. "My manager is trying to be me a shoot with '_Look_' as well," she said, smiling slightly when he looked blankly at her, "apparently it's the most subscribed fashion magazine," she said, giggling again when he nodded his head, no longer confused.

"Sounds good,"

"Yeah," she responded, "Hopefully it'll get me a little better well known. What about the band? Are you releasing anything new any time soon?"

"Well, we're planning on writing a new album soon. I'm supposed to be writing while I'm here," he told her proudly.

"Wow," she breathed, "I doubt I could ever write anything worth releasing," she laughed, "I always kind of admired musicians that write all their own music, it's something I would love to be able to do."

"I'm sure you would be able to if you tried," he assured her, secretly pleased that she found his work innovative and admirable.

She shook her head, "I don't play an instrument so I wouldn't be able to do that side of it and I'm not poetic enough for the lyrics side of it,"

"Have you ever tried?" he asked,

She shook her head, "No, but I can't imagine I would be any good. Remember how bad at poetry I was in school?" she giggled as they turned the corner to Alice's road.

He chuckled along with her, "you weren't that bad," he told her

She giggled, "I rhymed shower with hour, Edward. I was bad at it, okay?"

Laughing again with her he shook his head, "that was pretty bad," she shot him a mock glare before they began laughing again.

They came to a stop outside the block door, neither willing to break up the discussion.

"That must've been the only part of writing you were not good at," he laughed while she blushed. "Whatever happened to your dream to become an English teacher?" he asked curiously. She had always wanted to teach English but she obviously hadn't gone down that path, he wondered why she had changed her mind. She was always so stubborn; it was not in her character to change her mind about something.

"You remembered that?" she asked him, pleasantly surprised and slightly touched,

"Of course," he smiled crookedly, "Now, tell me what changed your mind,"

She laughed, "I don't know that my mind was ever changed," she said, thinking back to when she had first been offered a job in the modelling agency. "I had done English in college and was planning to go to University but I didn't have the cash,"

"So you didn't bother at all?" he asked, slightly surprised that she had given up so easily, "that's not the Bella I know,"

"No, I was still planning on going; I just had to take a gap year to earn the money,"

"And you thought that this was the next best thing?" he asked sceptically,

"No," she shook her head, "I actually worked in a hotel as a waitress,"

He shook his head, "I'm confused," he admitted, "so you were a waitress in a hotel, how do you get to be a well known model?"

She shrugged, "I was out shopping a few months into my hotel job and somebody offered me a job with their agency. They were offering good money, better than I was being paid at the hotel, so I took it as a temporary thing."

"Why did you stay?" he asked, still confused. This was not something he had ever pictured her doing.

She shrugged, blushing slightly. She didn't want to go into this right now.

He seemed to take the hint and change the subject. She felt slightly sorry for him; although they were on better terms there was still so many difficulties and awkward patches, so much she was unwilling to share. It couldn't be easy trying to patch a friendship together when one was so adamant not to let the other one in on their feelings and thoughts. She decided she would be looser around him, but only on certain subjects. She could not explain to him the real reason why she hadn't pursued her life long dream to become an English teacher and settled for something else instead. Not now.

"Where do you live now?" she asked after a while, "I mean, do you live with your parents up in Edinburgh or do you live elsewhere?"

"I live in Edinburgh but not with them," he told her; slightly surprised that she was interested. He knew she had been in contact with Esme and Carlisle in the interval that they had not talked. That was probably the main reason they were so set on the pair finding friendship again; they knew that she was the same girl that he had always viewed as his family.

"What's it like down there?" she asked curiously

"It's… nice," he told her simply, not really sure what else he could say. Sure, the actual place wasn't that bad and he quite liked his flat but there was nothing holding him there. Sure, he had friends and if he left he would miss some of them but he wasn't close enough to any of them to stop him from moving. In fact, if he were to get pretty much any offer, within reason, he would probably move away. His life there was just… empty, in a way. There was nothing to keep him there and no reason why he wouldn't leave given half the opportunity. Still, he couldn't tell her that.

"Just nice?" she asked sceptically.

"Yes, nice," he repeated, letting her know that the subject was dropped.

She felt better; at least she wasn't the only one of the two withholding information.

She shrugged simply before continuing, "Do you live on your own or with a friend or girlfriend?" she asked, hoping against her rationality that he would say he did not live with a girlfriend. It was that she was _jealous _as such; she just didn't like the idea of him being with somebody. It was a curious feeling, especially since it was only a 'teenage crush' as she told herself if was, unable to admit that she might actually have feelings for somebody who had hurt her so severely. But that was in the past, she told herself, she needed to get over that. It was old news, long forgotten. She had forgiven him, especially after his help the previous night. He had proved that he was actually capable of being caring.

"I live alone," he told her, watching her face carefully. She was too good at controlling her features though, and he didn't catch even a glimpse of the shameful joy she felt. He decided to try again, closely scrutinising her face and ready to catch sight of any flicker of emotion "My friends are mostly living with their own girlfriends and I'm single, you see," he told her.

She was well aware of his scrutiny and fought extra hard to control her features. However, battle as she may she couldn't quite control the emotion that showed and although it was only a brief second, she knew he had seen the flicker of happiness when he looked away with a satisfied smirk on his face.

She blushed deeply, completely embarrassed. She knew what he was doing and now he had caught her out. Maybe she could just explain that she was feeling the remnants of a teenage crush and this was simply the repercussion of his reappearance in her life? No, that wouldn't do; then she would have to admit to having feelings for him as a child, a feat that would go be easy to do considering she was the person left behind as a result of his adolescence.

Edward however, was quite pleased by this revelation. His rational, gentlemanly side was telling him that this was not an implication that she liked him in the way or to the degree that he liked her, by any means. He simply decided that she was experiencing some emotions that meant she didn't like the idea of him being with another woman. However, the majority of his brain was shouting in victory, fully satisfied that he was not the only one with feelings of admiration towards the other and a feeling of jealousy directed at the other's possible, ex or nonexistent other half.

He looked over at Bella who was staring at the floor and blushing deeply and felt awful at once. He had embarrassed her and he knew she hated being embarrassed and blushing.

"Will I see you again before I leave?" he asked, changing the subject.

"When are you leaving?" she asked as nonchalantly as she could managed despite the fact that her heart was going crazy at the thought of him disappearing from her life once again.

"Next week," he lied. He hadn't, in reality, decided when he was returning home and the idea of returning to an empty flat in Edinburgh when he could be here with Bella seemed absolutely ludicrous to him. But, if he told her he was leaving soon, he would get to see more of her in a shorter period of time. He could always say he's extended his stay at the end of the week.

"Oh," she said, slightly disappointed "Well, like I said, I've got that shoot tomorrow and I'm going to an interview for a catalogue job the day after that so I'm not sure if I would get to see you then. Maybe the day after that?" she said uncertainly. She didn't like the idea of not seeing him until three days time but she would have to get used to the idea of him leaving.

"Oh," he said, equally as disappointed "Sure, that sounds good," he assured her.

"Okay, well I'm going to have to get going," she said, "I have to be up early tomorrow to go to the gym so I need to get some sleep,"

"The gym?" he repeated, chuckling slightly,

"Yes, the gym" she replied, slightly annoyed "is anything funny about the gym?"

"No," he said quickly, "I just didn't have you down as a gym kind of girl," he admitted

She laughed, "If I didn't go to the gym regularly then do you think I'd still be in this business?"

He frowned, "What do you mean?"

"Well, if I don't keep in shape then I wouldn't have a job and I have to burn those calories some way," she told him laughing slightly, before hugging him loosely "Anyway, I'll see you on Wednesday," she told him before turning and walking down the road.

"Bye!" he called, staring after her as she walked down the road. He didn't go inside until long after she had turned the corner.

He spent the rest of the night thinking about the next time he would see her and the next time they would be spending a day like today together. He remembered the smiled and laughs of the day and smiled fondly. He had forgotten in the years that he had been without her how much he genuinely enjoyed spending time with Bella. He remembered the look that had crossed her face when he had told her he was single and stifled a smile. He knew that this may not be as he thought and that even if it was that didn't give him the go ahead to do anything. He had, after all, decided that he would be happy with just a simple friendship with Bella if that was all she wanted. He could not let a slightly indication that he may not be the only one of the two with feelings for the other go to his head.

He heard Alice return home, bringing him out of his thoughts. He got up and went through to greet her.

"Where've you been all day?" Alice asked, knowing that Bella had gone looking for him when Lucas had called around earlier that day. She did not know, however, whether the expedition had been successful and was eager to find out where he had spent the majority of his day.

"Bella and I spent the day trooping around London," he said, trying but failing to hide the grin that spread across his face

Alice stared at him, shocked, before squealing and pushing him into the seat next to her. "Tell me _everything!_"

**This is a short-ass chapter, I know. Sorry and all but I didn't want you guys to wait any longer. =)**

**Review, review, review!**

**Reviewers get a preview of chapter 11 =)**


	11. Chapter 11

Alice bumbled around the house excitedly the next day, preparing herself for a day with some of her other clients. She had a session with Nicole, one of her newest clients, that morning and had to go and had a meeting with Connor and Kiera that afternoon. Jasper had left for work half an hour previously and Edward was in his room. She was unsure of whether he was awake or not.

She packed a few sketchbooks into a bag and a list of some of her latest ideas. She heard the door to Edward's room open as she made her way to the kitchen; she pored two cups of coffee and passed him one as he padded into the kitchen. He smiled appreciatively as she handed it over and took an eager sip.

"What're you up to today?" he asked after a while,

"I've got a meeting with a new client this morning, so we're just going to go through the normal stuff. And then I've got a meeting with Kiera and Connor, they've got a shoot together so they need to be somewhat coordinated." She told him, not failing to notice how he reacted to the mentioning of Connor's name.

"Sounds good," he said stiffly,

She nodded, "what about you? Got anything planned?"

"No, I haven't" he said glumly, "I think I'll be going on a walk or something," he decided. It was about time he started writing something. He would have to make do without a guitar.

"Oh, okay," Alice nodded, "will you be in tonight?" she asked him wonderingly, she wanted to know whether there was any chance of getting the pair of them together tonight.

"Yes, I should be," he said thoughtfully, "why?"

"I was just wondering who would be here for tea," she said nonchalantly, "I was thinking maybe I would invite some people over," she added,

He nodded, "sounds good,"

He tried to calm himself down as he thought about the possibility of seeing Bella again after having thought throughout the night that he would not see her for several days. He told himself repeatedly that this did not necessarily mean Bella would be invited. After all, Alice had many other friends, as did Bella.

He tried to change the subject, hunting for a way to calm himself. He did not wish to talk about Connor and as much as he wanted to hear more of Bella, he knew he needed to calm down.

"So, what'll we be eating?" he asked, chuckling slightly when she rolled her eyes as if to say "_males and their food"_

She smiled over her nearly empty cup, "I thought I would get something in, I didn't want to make it a big thing, just a take away, film, chatter job," she told him.

He nodded, shooting her a quick smile "I'll be there," he said before he stood and stretched, yawning slightly.

Alice glanced at the clock, grimacing slightly and putting both her cup and Edward's in the sink and picking up her bag.

"I'm off," she told him, bidding him goodbye and heading out of the door.

He called a goodbye down the hallway as he headed toward his room to change. He donned a pair of tanned trousers and a blue shirt, pulling a green sweater over his shirt and digging out a pair of trainers. He rolled up the sleeve of his shirt and picked up a satchel bag, one he had used while at college, and put a notebook and pen in there. He slung it over his shoulder and left the house, heading towards the nearest bus stop. He caught a bus to The Green Park, near the palace and walked for a while through the grounds until he found a spot by a tree he thought was particularly picturesque. He settled himself down and sat watching the people wander for a while.

A family to his left were bumbling along the path, the parents holding hands, watching their two girls running ahead in front of them, laughing and giggling merrily. To his right was an elderly couple sitting at a bench. They were talking quietly between themselves, sitting closely together. His eyes settled upon a young couple walking ahead of him. They were holding hands, as the two parents had been, and were walking slowly in a carefree manner. They were laughing and talking, shooting each other loving glances.

Edward looked down at the notebook in his hand, unable to watch. Seeing other couples like that had always made him feel uneasy but somehow, today was worse. He wasn't sure why but there was some part of him that could not handle the observation on relationships. He had been this way for some time. He felt a slight emptiness when he saw what he was missing out on. Sure, he had had relationships, some short, some long, but none of them had made him feel completely free of the emptiness.

He thought about what may have brought these feelings to life. He thought of the changes in his life and his feelings. He began to think of Bella, of her face, her hair, her eyes, her clothes, everything. He thought of her smile and the way she looked when she was deep in thought. He thought of how much his feelings had developed in such a short time.

He thought about what he would do when he had to return home, and he knew he would have to eventually, whether he liked it or not.

He sighed; just thinking about leaving her made him sad.

He ran his hands through his hair in frustration; he needed to concentrate. He needed to get a better control of his feelings for Bella otherwise he would do something he would regret.

He looked up at the relatively clear sky and sighed.

He gazed for a while before returning to watching the other people wandering the park as he thought.

Every now and then, a word, line or phrase would come to mind and he would scribble it down. He sat for hours, simply gazing at the sky or watching the people around him while he thought and scribbled, forever trying to find a way to tie these together.

He stared at some of the lines he'd written.

Some jumped out at him.

_I look around the grave for an escape route of old routines_

_I whisper empty signs in your ear and hope you won't let go_

_So take the pieces and build them skywards_

He sighed.

He just couldn't put them together.

Eventually, he decided that he had had enough for the day and packed away his things. He strolled to the nearest bus stop and got on the bus to return back to Alice and Jasper's place. He walked unthinkingly, completely lost in his own thoughts. His feet carried him on the unfamiliar path as he thought about the song, about how he felt and, most importantly, about Bella.

He reached the flat quicker than usual. Or maybe he just thought that as he didn't recall most of the journey.

He flopped down on the sofa in the empty flat. He closed my eyes and sighed in frustration; _trust me to feel this way about somebody off limits. We could never be. We lived so far apart. We were so unfamiliar with each other now, and yet I felt stronger for her than I had felt for a woman… ever._

He snapped my eyes open.

_Really?_

_Did I really feel that way?_

_That intensely?_

He ran his hand through his hair once again, rolling over onto his side.

He turned the TV on and tried to distract himself with some kind of trivial nonsense they were always playing on TV nowadays. He stared at the screen aimlessly for a while, his thoughts wandering occasionally before he could rein them in and attempt to refocus his attention back to the screen in front of him.

"I'm home!" Alice called, startling him. "sorry." She giggled, coming through to join him

"It's okay," he said, sighing for the hundredth time that day and turning off the TV in exasperation; this clearly wasn't getting him anywhere.

Alice seemed to sense his irritation and looked slightly concerned, "Are you okay?" she asked him, placing her hand on his arm.

He nodded quickly, "I'm fine," he assured her, "I've just had a bit of an aggravating afternoon, that's all."

"How so?" she asked him, sitting down next to him and examining him. He _looked _fine. A little tired perhaps, but other than that he didn't look ill or anything of the sort. Her eyes darted to his hair; it was more tangled than usual and she guessed that was the result of him running his hands through it consistently. Maybe he was stressed, she thought.

"It's nothing," he shrugged, "I've just been struggling to concentrate,"

She nodded, hiding a smile. She knew why _that _was. She bit her lip and looked at him sympathetically, "I'm sure you'll settle on something soon," she assured him "everyone gets a little stressed every now and then."

He nodded, "thanks,"

"No problem," she beamed. "now, how did your walk go?" she asked, changing the subject, sensing she would not get any more information about what may be behind his unusual mood. _Not that I need it._

He nodded, smiling in appreciation of the subject change and the memory of the peaceful morning and afternoon he had spent in the park. "It was good, yeah."

"Where did you go?" Alice asked

"The Green Park," he told her "It was actually quite nice. It was warm, but not too warm. And it wasn't especially over crowded."

"Did you walk all the way there?" Alice asked, surprised

he chuckled, "No, I took the bus. I'm not sure I could handle there and back without sleeping for a few hours once at the park itself."

They both chuckled at this and Alice asked some more about his day and he told her of his brief walk around the park and his time people watching before he made any mention of his writing. As soon as he did however, she pounced on the opportunity and demanded that he showed her his work.

"please?" she pouted for the seventh time. She unleashed the full strength of her puppy dog eyes on him and he felt himself caving in. He had rather wanted to keep this to himself, at least until he was completely happy with what he had written but it seemed that there was just no saying no to this little pixie. He chuckled as he went to go and fetch his notebook and thought about how Jasper had this all the time. No wonder she got everything she wanted.

Then again, he thought, had it really anything to do with that? Aren't you supposed to want to give the person you love everything? Shouldn't you want to give them all the happiness in the world? At least, that's what he'd heard.

He found himself wondering to what extent this was true. He had never been truly in love with a woman, despite the length of some of his relationships. Of course, he _did _feel something for the women he had dated, but nothing that had ever fit this whole 'love' matter. At this thought, he found himself feeling rather down, a feeling which he always got when reminiscing his love life. He always felt unfulfilled and as though he had missed so much that he should have felt.

He sighed in frustration and ran his hands through his hair.

He told himself the same thing he always did when he began to feel as though his love experiences so far have been inadequate.

_My time will come. _

He looked down at the notebook in his hands before beginning to head back to Alice to show her the fruits of his work. He had only one thought in his head.

_I hope._

…………………………………

Bella returned home from a tiring day at work. The magazine editor had decided that she wanted to change the direction of the shoot half way through, meaning they had to start completely from scratch. It was not very often that anything like this happened but on the occasions that it did Bella found it extremely aggravating. She felt as though people should prepare before hand and that changing a shoot mid way was completely ludicrous. Not that she could say anything. As much as this annoyed her, she did not want to lose the job. In fact, they had been so impressed with her performance today that they had invited her back the same time next week.

She was actually rather pleased with this development; she knew this would get her a little higher up on the ladder.

She chuckled to herself as she began to run herself a bath. Who would've thought that she, Isabella Swan, would be trying to get herself so well known when, as a child, she had resented the limelight and had done everything within her own power to try and avoid it.

The human mind definitely was a strange thing, she decided as she stripped down and got into the bath.

She thought about the reason that she had carried on with this when it had become obvious she no longer needed the extra financial income. She knew it wasn't about the money; she rarely spent anything other than necessities. Well, disregarding all the things she had to constantly buy for work, but other than that, she rarely indulged herself with expensive luxuries.

She knew that what had started off about money had soon turned into something else. She had found herself becoming more and more confident as the time passed within the job and she grew to enjoy all the positive attention she had begun to attract. Not in an arrogant way; certain things still made her uncomfortable but not in such a way that they had before, and not in the amount of things.

Maybe it was just the confidence that came with the job? Maybe it was a result of the positive attention?

She finished washing her hair and lay back against the bath and soaked for a while as she thought.

Maybe, she thought, it was the feeling of beauty that came with the job?

Had she ever been made to feel beautiful by anybody before this job?

She knew the answer; no. She had been a girl with a 'face for the radio'. She had been no beauty queen. Until now.

Okay, so she did not think of herself as a 'beauty queen', but she definitely felt much better about herself now.

And then what she saw as the sad, sorry truth hit her.

She was in it for that and that alone.

All she wanted was for somebody to make her feel special and the only way that could be achieve was this way.

The thought numbed her. Was it true?

Was that shallow or desperate?

She sighed; she had no idea which was worse.

She sat in the bath and thought over and over about the little epiphany she had just had.

She didn't understand it. She didn't understand how she had not noticed this before hand.

Perhaps what was worrying her most was whether this should affect her view on her work?

She had no idea.

Sighing; she rose from the bath and wrapped a towel around herself before letting the water out and going through to her room and pulling on some clothes.

She felt in no mood to eat. In fact, she felt numb and strange. She felt uncertain, a feeling that she had not experienced in a long time, especially as far as her life was concerned.

She got straight into bed, knowing there was no way she would be able to concentrate on a book or the television.

She thought endlessly about her position in life as she lay in bed, waiting for sleep to over come her.

When it finally did, in the early hours of the morning, she couldn't have welcomed it more and she fell into a deep, much needed slumber.

………………………………………………

At around six o clock the next evening, Edward stood in the kitchen with Alice as they prepared dinner for the three of them. They were talking about the night before. It had been a quiet event; with only two other people attending. Lucas and Alana had joined the three of them for a takeaway and a film and Edward had to admit, it had been fun. He found the two of them very easy to talk to and got along with them very well.

Although, as much as he had enjoyed the previous night, he couldn't help but feel disappointed that Bella had not been in attendance. Alice, who had sensed this both the previous night and right there in the kitchen felt that she should bring up the issue, to at least let him know that she would have been there if she could.

"Bella was busy last night, Edward." She told him

He snapped his head up, "how did you know I…" he started, confused

"Was thinking about Bella?" she finished for him, beaming cheekily.

He swallowed before nodding his head, slightly worried.

Was he that obvious?

Had he accidentally said something out loud without realising?

"Because I know how much you like her," she shrugged, "and I just thought you should know that she would have been there if she had been asked."

"Wait," he said, confused again, "I thought you asked her?"

"Well, I rang but she didn't pick up and then Lucas mentioned he had seen her on her way home and she had been a little down." Alice shrugged, "I assumed she was in the bath or asleep or something. That's how she normally does to try and cheer herself up."

Edward tried not to let himself think about Bella in the bath or asleep and swallowed hard. "What was wrong with her?" he asked, concern laced in his voice.

Alice shrugged, "long day?"

Edward sighed and returned his attention to the salad he was supposed to be preparing while Alice worked on the main course of the night, He didn't like the idea of Bella being upset and wished that she had picked up the phone the previous night so that she could have been with the five of them. At least then they could try to cheer her up.

He hoped she was not getting upset over Connor. He had been waiting for her to express some kind of emotion on the subject and she was yet to do so. As much as he didn't want her to be upset, it was not healthy for her to keep all of her feelings bottled up as she did. It was something she had done as a child and he knew that she would eventually be unable to handle it all. He just hoped that she was not affected too badly.

The phone rang, making him jump. Alice laughed and went to go and get the phone, leaving him in the empty kitchen. He could hear Alice talking down the phone vaguely but could not make out what she was saying,

She returned several minutes later with a disappointed look on her face.

"Who was that?" he asked, hoping slightly that she would say it was Bella but still curious as to why she looked so disappointed.

"Jasper," she sighed. He stifled a sigh of his own.

"What'd he want?" he asked, knowing that it was unusual for Jasper to call from work.

"Bad news, I'm afraid." She sighed, returning to preparing the main course.

Edward sucked in a breath.

The first thing that sprang to mind was Bella.

But that was ridiculous, he told himself. Why would Jasper call about Bella?

And if there was something wrong then surely Alice would be freaking out about it?

Right?

He stood still, trying to calm his nerves, as he waited for her response.

"He's got to go away with work so he won't be home for a few days." She sighed.

Edward let out a sigh of relief; he was glad there was nothing to worry about.

He squeezed Alice's shoulder in a sympathetic gesture and smiled at her knowingly.

Now they would both be away from those they wanted to see.

"Pass me the phone," she said after a while.

Edward complied, not failing to notice the slightly glint in her eye. He knew what that meant; she was planning something.

"Who're you calling?" he asked as he cautiously handed it over.

"Bella," she said simply, smiling at him smugly when a look of anticipation took over his features.

"W-why?" he stuttered nervously.

She smiled at his discomfort playfully. "We can't let this food go to waste, now can we?"

**I'm sorry this took so long to get out. I hope that this chapter is up to scratch. =)**

**You wouldn't **_**believe **_**how long it took me to figure out which song to use! I wanted one that got his feelings right and I was going to use 'Demolition Lovers' by My Chemical Romance but the first line kind of mucked it up 'Hand in mine, into your icy **_**blues**_**' so I chose another song. Anyone know which one? =P**

**Review, review, review!**

**Reviewers get a preview of the next chapter!**


	12. Chapter 12

**As usual, sorry about the delay, I was planning on updating last weekend but then I updated PTG, PTF because I'm trying to alternate and I totally ran out of time for this as I was working my butt off to get my English coursework finished for Monday morning! Anywho, yes, sorry! **

**Unfortunately, the next update will also be delayed as I'm going away with family for while and seeing as they have no idea that I write I can't even write it out by hand a type it up someplace… Sorry!**

**Thanks to everyone who has read/reviewed/added this story so far! **

Bella was stretching out along her sofa, reading a book and putting off cooking when Alice rang. She dragged herself towards the phone and answered, stifling a sigh.

"Hello?" she said in a tired tone.

"Bella!" Alice's squeal came down the phone. Bella found herself smiling despite her dreary stupor. That was one of the reasons Bella love Alice's company; it was almost impossible to be unhappy when Alice was in a good mood! It was just infectious!

"Hey," Bella replied, in a slightly more enthusiastic tone

"You haven't eaten, have you?" Alice asked,

Bella frowned, "No, I haven't. I've been putting it off; I really can't be bothered to cook after the day I've had."

Bella heard Alice squeak with glee before telling her "Be over at mine in 20 minutes,"

"Alice…" Bella started, ready to protest

"No, Bella." Alice cut her short "You're coming, and that's final."

"I _am _capable of cooking, Alice" Bella sighed, "I don't want to be any trouble."

Alice laughed, "Bella, don't be ridiculous, you're never any trouble."

Bella sighed, knowing she would not get out of this one. Not that she minded going to Alice's. In fact, she was relieved that she did not have to cook and felt as though she was well in need of a little time to relax and forget everything about work and the little _revelation _of the night before. And there was always the bonus; Edward would be there.

"And anyway," Alice carried on, interrupting Bella's thoughts "I've got extra food. I cooked for three and there are only two of us eating tonight."

"Fine," Bella caved "I'll see you in 20 minutes"

She laughed as she heard Alice squeal down the phone and rolled her eyes, saying a quick bye and then replacing the phone on its cradle. She padded through to her room and looked in the mirror. She was still wearing the very same things she had worn to her interview that day. Her agent had got her an interview with a popular clothing line for a catalogue job. It was nothing major but he just said that it would look good on her CV; the more variety the better. The catalogue was supposed to be for their latest summer line so she had been advised to dress accordingly. Luckily, the weather had, for once, been in her favour and it had been a lovely, sunny, warm day.

Her hair was in a messy ponytail and she wore a fitted dark, checked shirt with three quarter length sleeves and a dark pair of denim shorts. Looking out the window, she decided that she wouldn't bother changing. The sun was still out and she could tell it was still warm by the warmth of the apartment. Sighing, she grabbed her bag and made her way out of her apartment and over to Alice's.

It didn't hit her until she was about half way what Alice had said."_There's only two of us tonight." _

_Oh, well great._ Bella found herself thinking bitterly as she realised it was more probable that she was talking about Jasper and herself as opposed to Edward. She knew that Jasper did occasionally go away but he usually gave notice, plus he hadn't been in a while.

She reached the apartment and stomped up the stairs, thinking about the night she was about to have. Not only was she in a bad mood after she had realised the reasoning behind her career the previous night, but she was now disappointed at the idea of possibly not seeing Edward all night.

She knocked on the door dejectedly and waited for either Alice or Jasper to answer.

"Can you get that?" she heard Alice shout from the other side of the door, no doubt in the kitchen. She leaned against the wall and stared at the floor miserably as she waited for the door to be opened, jumping slightly when it was.

She looked up, expecting to see Jasper, but instead her eyes met a pair of green orbs. Her heart began to beat like crazy as she took in the sight of Edward before her. He was dressed in a plain white shirt and a pair of light wash jeans. It was so simple, yet he looked so amazing.

Noticing that she was staring, Bella shook herself and dragged her eyes up to meet his once again.

"Hi," she said, smiling slightly.

_Well, _she thought, _this is one way to improve my mood. _She mentally warned herself; _he's probably on his way out or something! Don't get too excited! _

"Hey," he replied, his eyes quickly taking in her appearance before he mirrored her smile and moved aside so that she could go through.

"Bella!" she heard Alice scream as she went through the hall. She headed towards the kitchen and was quickly tackled by Alice.

"Hey, Alice." She giggled as she hugged her back

"Hey, yourself." She grinned deviously.

_What was with this little pixie? _

"Where's Jasper?" Bella asked when she noticed he wasn't there.

Alice shrugged, "he's away for a business meeting." She told her, watching her out of the corner of her eyes as she added "it's just me, you and Edward tonight."

Bella's heart started thudding again and she fought to keep the smile from her face as she knew she was being watched by the devious little pixie beside her. She tried to compose her face into her best nonchalant expression before she spoke, hoping her voice would not betray her and letting the others know how much that excited her.

"Oh, okay, cool" she said, shrugging.

Alice nodded before she ushered her out of the kitchen so that she could finish the food in peace.

Bella made her way over to Edward who was watching the TV in the living room.

"Hi," she said as she sat down,

"We already did this, remember?" he teased, "At the door?" he added when she looked confused.

"Oh, sorry" she said once she figured out what he meant.

The tone of her voice worried him. She seemed annoyed, upset perhaps. It wasn't like her. Usually, she would just laugh and shrug off comments like that.

"Are you okay?" he asked her as she stared at the TV in front of her blankly.

She nodded, not taking her eyes off the set.

He was less than appeased by this answer but he knew this was all he would get. For now. He knew that there was no way Bella could escape Alice's questioning.

"Dinner's ready!" Alice called not long after

Bella rose silently and made her way to the dining table. She sat opposite Edward and Alice sat next to Edward. They tucked into their meal, all thoroughly enjoying it.

"This is really good, Alice" Edward said as he ate

Alice giggled and thanked him, sending him a questioning glance and nodding over to Bella. He shrugged lightly and returned to his meal, hoping that now Alice was aware of Bella's mood he would get some answers.

"Bells?" Alice asked after they had finished their food and Bella had failed to say a word "what is it?" she asked gently

Bella's head snapped up, as if she had been lost in thought and Alice's question had yanked her away.

"Hmm?" she asked blankly

"What's wrong?" Edward repeated Alice, even more concerned.

Bella stared at her empty plate and shrugged, "nothing much," she replied.

Alice rolled her eyes, "nothing much _my arse. _I know when there is something wrong with you Bella, and there is something wrong now!"

Sighing in frustration, Bella stood up and took her empty plate into the kitchen. Edward watched worriedly as Alice rose from her seat also and followed her through.

"Bella, you can tell me, you know." Alice assured her

Bella came back through to the dining room and picked up both Edward and Alice's empty plates and returned back to the kitchen.

"There's nothing wrong, Alice" she said firmly.

Alice sighed and returned to the dining room table. Edward caught her eye and she shrugged. He was surprised that she had given up so easily but he had a suspicion that this wasn't the end of this.

Bella rejoined them at the table not long later and they talked for a while about trivial things and Edward could tell that Bella was trying her best to put as much input into the conversation as possible but he wasn't fooled; he knew there was still something wrong.

"How did your interview go, by the way?" Alice asked Bella after she'd finished recounting the events of her day at work.

Bella's head snapped up and the others could see the stress she had been trying to hide resurface.

"Fine," she shrugged, looking down at her hands.

Edward noticed Alice's eyebrows shoot up and a look of deep concern taking over her features.

"Bella, honey?" she started, putting her hand on Bella's "what is it? Has something happened at work?" she asked quietly.

Bella sighed, apparently tired of all the questions. She sat back in her seat and put her hands over her face.

"Is it that Connor guy?" Edward asked sharply, causing her to move her hands and laugh quietly. Edward and Alice exchanged a weary glance at this, slightly worried about their friend's sanity.

"No, it's nothing like that, guys." She said eventually.

"then what is it?" Alice asked her gently. Bella sat up straight in her seat and looked down at her hands before meeting our eyes in turn.

"I was thinking yesterday, after the shoot…" she started

"Did something happen at the shoot?" Alice shot in before Bella could continue

Bella considered for a moment before she answered, "well, something happened that _did _annoy the hell out of me, but that's beside the point. That has nothing to do with this." She told us, shrugging nonchalantly before the worry returned to her eyes. "I just thought…."

"What happened at the shoot?" Alice cut in once again, eager to get to the point of the conversation.

Bella sighed, running her hands through her hair in frustration. "Relax, Alice" she told her, slightly frustrated, "I just got annoyed because half way through they decided they wanted to go another way entirely which meant scrapping all of the work we'd already done and sending me off to change and get my make up redone, etcetera." She sighed "It was just a long day, I guess."

Alice looked at her sympathetically, "I hate it when that happens," she told her, "What way did they decide to go?"

Edward sighed in frustration; _at this rate, we'll never find out what's going on with Bella _he thought to himself as he listened to the babble that had begun. He tuned most of it out and began to twiddle his thumbs until he could barely take not knowing anymore. He was about to tell Alice to shut up and stop asking questions when he started listening to the conversation.

"It was _ridiculous!_" Bella said, exasperated "I mean, who in their right mind would wander around the streets in near enough their underwear?"

Alice giggled, "_Apparently _the readers of that magazine,"

Edward gulped, trying to calm himself and rid all of the mental images that were rushing though his mind as he digested that scrap of information. His heart was hammering at the thought and he hoped he didn't look like some hormone driven teenager.

"Is this the shoot you were on yesterday?" He asked as casually as he could manage, hoping that he didn't sound like a hormone driven teenager.

Alice giggled at him, giving him a quick, knowing smile. He shot her a glare before he redirected his attention to Bella. Luckily, Bella had missed their little exchange as she had been looking down at the table, embarrassed.

_Maybe I shouldn't have asked _Edward thought as he watched her cheeks redden. _Maybe she really _had _forgotten I was here. _

She nodded her head and Edward laughed quietly, "the one my mum gets?" he asked, teasingly

Her cheeks reddened, giving him his answer.

"I'd completely forgotten about that!" she moaned, burying her face in her hands.

Alice and Edward began laughing at her reaction, receiving some unladylike gestures from Bella.

Alice giggled and Edward smiled crookedly at her, "Don't worry, Bells" he told her eventually, using his childhood nickname for her. Her heart began hammering in her chest. _Almost as if we were never apart, _she thought to herself. She doubted he had even noticed he had called her that. "Like you said; you've changed a lot. She might not recognise you." He laughed

Bella huffed unhappily but otherwise said nothing, still blushing from the thought of an adult who had watched her grow up seeing her in a magazine in an outfit that may as well be underwear because they stylist took the 'ripped and rugged' look a little too far. Whether Esme would recognise her or not, it was still an embarrassing thought.

After Bella had recovered from her humiliation, Edward finally reminded the girls of the point of the conversation.

"So," he said to Alice "if you're done butting in, I for one would like to hear what is troubling Bella."

"Sorry," Alice said, guiltily looking at Bella with a sorry expression

Bella laughed at her expression, "its okay,"

"So," Edward started again, once again trying to prevent any other interferences "you said you were thinking about something?" he prompted.

Bella looked uneasily between the pair, "yeah, I started thinking about something that I guess I wasn't too happy about," she started. She wasn't quite sure how to put this to make them understand. Maybe they would think she was being stupid. Maybe they would agree. What would she do, she wandered, if they agreed and she found herself too unhappy to carry on modelling? What would she do? Where would she work?

Alice and Edward had been exchanging worried glances in the silence that had come upon the three of them as Bella got lost in her thoughts again. Alice, who was now sitting next to her, put a soothing hand on her shoulder while Edward, who remained opposite her, placed his hand on hers in what he hoped was a caring gesture. The contact made them both jump, bringing Bella out of her thoughts and making Edward take away his hand with an apologetic look on his face.

Bella sighed, calming her now racing heart, and tried to phrase what she was about to say in her head before she said it aloud.

Finally, Alice sighed, "Bella, if it's too much then don't feel as though we're forcing you." She said in a gentle voice, "Just as long as you know we're here for you if you ever need us."

Bella took a deep breath, "No, it's fine." She told them, smiling gratefully, "I'm sorry about this, guys. I'm ruining the evening with my miserable mood."

"No, you're not," Edward assured her, placing his hand on hers once again but this time, he kept it there as the electric-like current passed through the two of them. "We're just worried about you," he assured her kindly,

"Yes," Alice agreed, "we just want to make sure you're okay,"

Bella smiled at the two of them, not knowing how she ever got so lucky as to get friends like this. "Thank you," she told them both, squeezing Edward's hand and grinning at Alice before taking a deep breath and starting her explanation. "It's just that, I was thinking, yesterday after the shoot, about why I was doing what I am. I guess that had been on my mind since you'd asked," she said, looking at Edward. "And I couldn't really find an answer."

Edward frowned in confusion and Alice began to look even more worried.

"What do you mean, you found no answer?" Edward asked, uncomprehending

She sighed, "No, that's not right," she muttered, "I _did _find an answer, but what I mean is that it wasn't one I liked."

"What was the answer?" Alice asked gently

"That I'm doing all of this for the wrong reason. It was a stupid answer. It was superficial and vain." Bella said quietly as tears began to well in her eyes, "And then I realised that I couldn't do this forever and I that I have no idea how what I am going to do."

Edward squeezed her hand lightly and Alice hugged her tightly, "Bella, honey. What was the reason? It can't be that bad."

Bella wiped her eyes, "it's as if I'm doing this to try and fill some kind of hole." She sniffed "It's like I'm trying to make up for when I was a kid, like I'm trying to try and be some perfect person on the outside. I'm not sure if I really want to carry on with this modelling rubbish." She sniffed again.

Alice exchanged a glance with Edward, something that didn't go unmissed by Bella.

"You think I'm being silly," Bella said quietly, looking at the table

"No," Alice started, "We don't-"

"You think I'm overreacting." Bella said a little louder, sighing heavily and putting her head in her hands.

Edward abruptly stood up and walked around to the same side of the table as the girls. He sat on the chair on the other side of Bella and took her face in his hands, angling it so that she had no choice but to look at him.

"Bella, we do _not_," he told her firmly, "we're just worried, and that's all. This is a big thing, rethinking your life so quickly. We just want what is best for you, and you have to do what you think is best for yourself. If you think starting all over again is what you need to do then do it. We'll be behind you one hundred percent, as will all of your friends."

Bella sniffed, she looked between Alice and Edward and saw a look of complete sincerity on both of their features. She wiped her eyes one last time and smiled sadly at them. "thanks,"

Alice grinned, "No problem. Just come to us if you need us, okay?"

She nodded, pulling Alice into a hug.

The phone rang in the next room and Alice hopped off the chair sending an apologetic look to Bella. "It's probably Jasper," she said quietly, going through to the living room to retrieve the phone.

The pair of them watched them go before Bella turned to Edward, "thank you, Edward," she said quietly

He grinned, "Like Alice said, it's no problem. We're always here."

She mirrored his grin and they both stood. She pulled him into a hug, catching him off guard. Soon, she felt his body relax and he hugged her back. She pulled away quickly, and then went through to the living area where Alice was on the phone.

Edward stood where he was for a moment, thinking back to the current that had passed through him, firstly when he had held her hand and then when they hugged. He couldn't help but wonder; _did she feel it, too? _Eventually, he shook himself and forced himself to focus on something other than Bella and the way it felt to hug her. He went through to the living room to find them debating over what film to watch and plonked himself down on the sofa happily as he waited for them to decide.

………….

"Thank you, so much" Bella said after the film had finished,

"Actually, thank you for eating the food!" Alice giggled,

"_And _making the evening fun," Edward added

Bella laughed, "Well, I don't know about that,"

She stretched and yawned before she picked up her bag, "I think I'm going to head home," she said

Alice's face instantly dropped and Edward was, internally, mirroring her disappointment.

"Can't you stay?" Alice pleaded, unleashing the full power of her eyes upon Bella. Edward was glad to see her resolve waver as Alice pleaded and it wasn't long before Bella had agreed to stay in the other guest room for the night.

They stayed up a while longer before they all decided it was time they headed to bed. Bella made her way to the empty guest room but was stopped by Alice who was brandishing a pile of clothes.

"To sleep in," Alice told her, thrusting the pile into her arms. "By the way, that outfit looks _sexy_" she laughed.

Bella laughed along with her, rolling her eyes, "thanks, Alice" she said, shaking her head and laughing as she opened the door and called goodnight to the others before carefully closing it behind her.

Once inside, she changed into her pyjamas and crawled into bed, suddenly ridiculously tired.

She found herself thinking about the days events as she waited for sleep to overcome her. She couldn't help but smile at the way her friends had made her feel as though everything was okay when she knew that she would be feeling very confused for a long time about what to do.

She thought about the things they had said, that they would always be there.

Mostly, about what Edward had said.

"_We're always here."_

"We're _always here."_

'We're' including himself.

Meaning he would always be there for her?

She rolled over to face the wall and looked at the patterns crack of light that was coming through the door from the bathroom light. Undoubtedly, Alice was still in there, messing with her hair or something like it. She rolled her eyes, so typical.

She thought back to Edward. She couldn't help but think that what he had said was a spur of the moment thing and held little promise. After all, wasn't he supposed to be leaving within the next few days? When he had left and was back with all his old friends, would he still 'be there for her'? He hadn't exactly done that before. But he had apologised about that and, she told herself, it wasn't as if they were on terms this good when he left the first time.

She heard the bathroom light being switched off and she was thrown into complete darkness which only added to her exhaustion. She began to get drowsy and found herself unable to keep her eyes open; she really hadn't realised how tired she had been.

She made one promise to herself before she went to sleep;

_Edward Cullen was going to disappear from my life soon so I'm going to make the very most of him until that very moment. _

**Review, review, review!**

**It took me **_**ages **_**to get this right, I just couldn't get it how I wanted it…. I hope it worked for you guys?**

**REVIEWERS GET A PREVIEW OF CHAPTER 13!**

**=)**


	13. Chapter 13

**I'm sorry about the delay but I've got a series of exams again over the next few weeks so I've been working on those… **

**Just to prove I haven't forgotten you all, I cut my Friday night of running through/hiding in/crawling around trees and basically being immature in Long Eaton short to come home and write for you guys!!! See, I do love you although there are only like, 2 of you who bother to show any appreciation in reviews. But there we go…. **

**Thanks to all who reviewed and sorry about the delay in the preview! **

**Anyway, ENJOY. XD**

"Morning," Bella sang as she entered the kitchen where Alice and Edward were talking to one another softly. They both looked at her curiously but didn't say anything, glad that there was an improvement on her mood. She grinned at the both of them and they both returned the gesture, slightly amused.

"So, what do you two want to do today?" Alice asked after they'd eaten their breakfast together.

Edward shrugged and Bella sat thinking for a moment. "I suppose I could take the day off and spend it with you guys," she concluded, "after all, I've had a busy week so far."

Alice nodded and Edward felt himself smiling happily, something that didn't get missed by Alice. "Do you want to go out?" Alice suggested after they'd failed to come up with anything to do within the house.

Bella nodded and Edward thought about the possibilities for a moment or two before asking the girls about the available pastimes. "What is there to do around here? I mean, I know it's London and there's tonnes of stuff to do if you look in the right places but I haven't been here in a while,"

Alice laughed while Bella looked puzzled and thought.

"I think we should do something fun that we don't get to do everyday," Bella said "I'm not sure what, though."

"I know!" Alice squealed "_Laser Quest_!"

……………………

Shortly after, the three of them were all pulling on the packs for the game while the instructor went through the rules. Due to the time, they were the only ones there so decided to play 'one for all', eliminating any teams from the game.

After they were all successfully in their packs and had been told how to work the guns and the rules, they were lead into the ant-chamber of the gaming room. Everything was black except the odd patch of white, thanks to the UV lighting.

Bella, struggling to tighten the strap on her pack so that it would not bang against her hip as she ran, turned around to ask for Edward's assistance and burst into a fit of laughter as soon as she saw him.

"What?" he asked, amused by her outburst

"Your –" she gasped between laughs "your _teeth!_"

Alice whirled around to see what was causing the commotion and joined Bella in her laughter when she got a glance of his glowing teeth.

Edward clamped his hand to his mouth self consciously. "Shut up," he grumbled, frowning.

"Oh, Edward, I'm, I'm…" Bella tried to apologise as she gasped for air and he turned around so that he was facing the other direction.

"Stop being a baby!" Alice giggled after she's composed herself and Bella was laughing was a little more controlled than before.

"Sorry, Edward." Bella chuckled as she walked around him so that she was in front of him. "I didn't mean to embarrass you." She said innocently with a slight smirk playing on his features.

Edward mock glared at her and turned away again, causing them both to laugh. Alice stood in the corner laughing to herself as she watched the two of them acting like 4 year olds while the employee stood waiting patiently by the door for them to be ready for the game.

"Come on, guys" Alice said, grabbing each of their hands and dragging them towards the door where the employee stood, giving Alice an appreciative smile. The employee gave their packs one last check over before opening the door for them and telling them that they had two minutes to place themselves somewhere inside the room before the game began.

Alice ran at full pelt away from the others as soon as she went into the room, obviously eager to get a good location without being followed. She was soon lost to the others within the darkness. They saw the reflection of the flashing lights on her pack against some of the scenery over to the left and Edward smirked, heading for that direction.

Bella rolled her eyes and ran off in the other direction once he was on Alice's trail. She found one of the bridges just as the music began to play and her laser gun fired up, making the familiar sound effects. She put both of her hands on the sensors, ready to shoot if need be, while she headed up the bridge and found a long platform that ran along the length of the room. It had a good view of the room and was relatively hard to find as the passage was small and of to the left of a covered passageway. Bella herself had been here many a times before even realising the existence of this bridge. Connor had shown it her once when they had been here once with some other friends, they were on the same team and Connor said he would show her the best spot. She smiled to herself as she thought of all the times she'd been here despite the fact that she was a little older than the target audience.

_You never get too old for this _she thought to herself as she saw the reflection of some plashing yellow lights off to her left. She waited for Alice to come out from behind the large wooden partition so that she could shoot at her.

The wait wasn't long and soon enough, Bella hit the trigger and the flashing lights stopped flashing and the lights on her gun went out. Bella heard her groan in frustration and she laughed quietly, ducking down behind the bridge to avoid detection. When she popped her head above the wall of the bride again the now flashing yellow lights were moving swiftly towards the front of the room. Bella hit the trigger again and smiled in satisfaction as the lights stopped flashing, the gun lights went out and Alice cursed.

Next, Bella scanned the room for Edward's pack. Before long, she saw some flashing red lights in the far left corner and waited for the perfect opportunity to strike. Unfortunately, he was too fast at first. He moved with great speed towards the front of the room towards Alice's lights, dodging behind and around the scenery, never being exposed for more than a second or two. It wasn't until he saw Alice and positioned himself on the other side of the partition closest to him, exposing himself that Bella managed to get him. He cursed loudly as his lights stopped flashing and his gun went out.

Bella found herself imagining the look on his face at that moment and found herself laughing hysterically, unable to stop. The noise drew Edward's attention and he scanned the room for Bella's blue pack, following … the sound of her musical laugh. His eyes zeroed in on a corner on some sort of bridge above them where there were faint blue lights were flashing behind the wall of the bridge which he had failed to notice until now.

Smirking to himself, he glanced around the corner and hit the trigger, putting out the flashing yellow lights and taking off towards the blue ones before Alice could follow. He fun quietly, trying to keep his pursuit unknown.

Bella stopped laughing and glanced over the bridge nervously, well aware that she had just given away her location. She scanned the room and saw yellow lights far ahead and started to aim when she caught sight of red lights dangerously close. She waited silently, hoping he would not see the little passageway that lead to her hiding place as he passed through the covered walk way. She watched as he disappeared under the walk way and waited anxiously, ready to flee in case he came near. She saw no approaching blue lights for some time and relaxed a little, refocusing on Alice's lights as she aimed and waited for Alice to expose herself.

Soon enough, Alice jumped out from behind the scenery and made a run to the nearest passageway, obviously wondering where her opponents had gotten to. Bella hit the trigger hard but instead of hearing the sound effect that accompanied being shot across the room, she heard it much closer to home.

She looked down at her gun and saw the lights go out. Gasping, she whipped around to see Edward standing close top her, smirking as she glared at him. She gripped her gun tightly, waiting for it to power back up so she could immediately shoot him but he was too quick for her; no sooner had the sound of the gun powering back up filled the room, the lights were out and he was smirking wider. She huffed and he began to laugh hysterically as she threw him angry looks.

Taking his brief moment of distraction, she whirled around and ran in the opposite direction, down the bridge and towards the nearest stair case. Momentarily startled, he watched as she ran from him and he felt a sense of loss as he watched her hair flailing around her as she ran quickly. Quickly, though, he regained himself and followed her, catching up wit her easily and shooting her as her gun powered up once again.

She growled in frustration, causing him to laugh.

She took a sharp left as the bridge split and she ran, quicker still, to the ground level and began weaving in and out of the scenery, well aware that he wasn't far behind her.

He was still smiling as he watched her run through the room in vein. He slowed his pace to give her a chance, her little lags working their hardest as his long ones strode through the place. He followed her through the rest of the bridge and was caught of guard temporarily when she took a sharp left. _She must know this place _he thought to himself. He chuckled; this was exactly the type of place he could imagine silly Bella frequenting.

He followed as she ran through the scenery, trying and failing to loose him. _She's forgotten she's wearing a big, flashing thing! _Edward thought to himself.

Bella looked behind to see Edward close on her tail, rounding the last corner and decided she would try to trick him and get another shot in while she can. He hadn't made any attempt to shoot at her since she had left the bridge and hoped that her plan wouldn't back fire.

At the last minute, she swerved into a cave like passage with only one entrance and a thick partition in the middle. Edward followed her and was caught off guard when she turned abruptly and shot at him, getting him first time. Unable to stop thanks to all the speed he had gathered, he slammed into her and she fell back against the wall. She laughed hysterically as he pulled her off the ground and stood her up against the wall, panicking,

"Bella?" he said, worry lacing his velvety tone "Are you okay?" he fretted

Bella continued to laugh, "yes," she choked out eventually, her laughter coming to an abrupt stop when she realised how close the two of them were and how the hand that was still touching her arm from when Edward had pulled her up was sending an electric current through her veins, Just as it had the night before.

"You had me worried for a moment then," he chuckled "I thought I'd squashed you"

She laughed at this but the sound came out a little more nervous than she would have liked.

"Well, no…" she breathed, "I'm fine." She told him, unable to say much more or think of any other coherent sentences with him this close.

He seemed to realised how close they were too, as he gasped and gripped her arm tighter, no longer laughing. They stared at each other intently for a moment before neither of them could handle it much longer and began to move closer.

Edward's breath was tickling Bella's face as he hesitated for a moment, trying to make sure this was okay with her. She swallowed hard but made no move to move away, both anxious and hesitant about what was about to happen.

She leaned closer to him, urging him to continue before a flash of yellow appeared in the corner of Bella's eyes and a loud shout deafened the two of them.

"_There you are!_" Alice shouted before taking in their situation and squealing loudly before running off in the opposite direction.

Bella, who was a shade of crimson, was both angry and relieved that Alice had intervened. Angry because… It was Edward; the guy that she had been crushing on for more years of her life than she could care to remember. The guy that she had always believed to be so far out of reach it was laughable that she ever even bothered having feelings for somebody do obviously out of her league. But relieved because… it _was _Edward. She didn't know whether she was ready for that. She was still so confused about the way she felt about him and the reasons she had gotten with Connor that it made her head hurt. There was so much she needed to figure out right now that she wasn't sure whether she could handle the possibility of awkwardness _yet again _between the two of them. And even if, however slim this possibility may be, there _was _no awkwardness between them and something good actually came out of this, there was the small matter of him leaving in a few days. She didn't know if she could get close to him again, especially like that, when she knew it would only be a matter of days before he left her, hurting her all over again.

He was watching her intently as she stared into space, lost in thought.

He was willing her to look back up at him, to show him that what he was about to do _was _okay after all.

_If Alice has messed up my chance I will __**kill **__her! _Edward thought to himself as Bella shook her head and seemed to come back to the present.

He smiled down at her and she bit her lip nervously, unable to think what to do.

She was confused and panicked but most of all she was _scared. _She didn't want him to do this if he was going to leave in a few days. She couldn't bare to feel like she's finally gotten something she has wanted for so long only for it to walk away and never be seen again.

He stepped closer to her again as she met his eyes, he smiled crookedly as she looked at him nervously.

A mechanical voice filled the room, telling them they had mere seconds of game time left.

_How was it this has only been 20 minutes? _Bella thought to herself as she continued to look nervously up at Edward.

"10" the voice boomed

"9"

"8"

Edward got still and started to lean towards her so that they were in nearly the same predicament as before, minus Alice, of course.

"7"

"6"

"5"

Bella held her breath, completely sure she could not handle him leaving after this. She closed her eyes, making her decision.

"4"

"3"

"2"

Bella hit the trigger and Edward's lights went out just before the game ended.

Edward stood there, unmoving, just as close.

He looked mortified to Bella.

He felt awful.

Rejected, for one.

Embarrassed. Humiliated. _Awkward. _

He straightened up before turning briskly and walking off.

Bella followed, grabbing his arm and turning him around.

She smiled apologetically and reached up on her tip toes to give him a kiss on the cheek.

"I'm sorry," she whispered

He sighed, "Don't worry, I understand" he lied "don't be sorry,"

She pulled his face up so that his eyes met hers "You're going to leave," she said simply "I didn't want to do this if you were just going to leave me again."

Edward, shocked, stood staring for a moment before he composed himself. He seemed relieved.

"Well, in that case I'm sorry."

"Me too," she said before taking his hand and pulling him towards the exit where Alice was waiting.

Once there they all took off their packs and went to the car. Now that they were out in the open and were no longer holding hands, Bella felt extremely embarrassed. And judging by the awkwardness that was between the two of them; so did Edward.

The car ride was silent, Alice watching the two of them intently, trying to figure out why they were so distant after what had just happened.

They dropped Bella off at her own flat after she declined an invite for dinner, saying that she 'has her own flat and should really spend some time there or all that money would have been wasted'.

As she got out of the car, Edward grabbed her hand

"Bella," he said "was that the only reason?"

She swallowed hard. He didn't look like he wanted to hurt her or take the piss or anything. He looked sincere.

The least she could do to say thank you for respecting her wishes and not making another move when she'd made it clear the feelings were there was tell the truth.

She sighed, "yes."

He nodded, smiling crookedly and she couldn't help but smiled back.

She rolled her eyes and got out of the car, saying goodbye one last time before she went up to the front door.

Edward watched her as she went, as Alice watched him.

"So, Edward," she began "have a nice game?" she asked innocently, grinning slightly.

**Review, review, review!**

**PLEASE tell me what you think!**

**Think about what NEARLY happened. **

**Then review.**

**Is that not reason enough?**


	14. Chapter 14

**Okay, so thanks to the ONE person who actually bothered to show any appreciation of an update in a review! **

**Sorry this took so long. I was planning on updating last weekend but I ended up on a Night Hike and, to be honest, after hiking the entire night, getting lost in endless cow fields at 3am and being **_**covered **_**in cow crap, I wasn't really in the mood to write! **

Edward didn't sleep much that night. He couldn't stop thinking about what had nearly happened with Bella.

He wasn't angry at her; he understood. She was confused. So was he.

Plus, she had a point about him leaving. He knew he had to leave in a matter of days, as much as he hated to admit it, and starting something with Bella would be difficult for the both of them with such distance between them.

He was, though, more sure of his feelings for her. And hers for him.

At least now he knew; it gave him peace at mind to know that the attraction wasn't one sided.

Rolling over, he groaned and looked at the clock.

_5am _

He sighed; he had woken up every hour since he had gone to bed and he just wasn't tired anymore.

Deciding to do something productive, he swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood up, standing still while he got his balance. After he had pulled on some jeans, he padded into the living room and looked around. Everything was as they had left it the night before. He tidied all that needed tidying and then found his bag, taking out his notebook and looking over some of the things he had written.

Tapping his pencil on the paper, he struggled to get himself into the right frame of mind to carry on with what he had written the last time he had begun to write. After about half and hour of staring at a blank page, he sighed in frustration; he obviously wasn't going to get anywhere with this song tonight.

Instead, he powered up his laptop, deciding it would be a good idea to see whether there had been any response to the email he had sent to Adam what seemed like weeks ago.

Sure enough, he had many neglected emails, several of which were from Adam or the other band members. Sighing, he clicked the first email from Adam.

_Edward,_

_What the __**hell? **__What's __**wrong **__with you?_

_What the bloody hell are you doing in London?_

_What about the band? _

_Remember us?_

_Seriously, get your head straight and get back here. _

_Call me._

_Adam._

Edward hastily pressed delete before moving on to the next email. It was from Kyle, their vocalist. It followed on pretty much the same lines as Adam's had; demanding for him to come back to Edinburgh and sort himself out. The last part caught his attention, though.

_Matt's been getting us some really good shows and you know what? We've had to turn down some of the best offers we've ever had because you're off pansying around in London. _

Edward gulped guiltily; he really was causing some problems within the band. Matt, their manager, had always gotten them decent shows but now they were getting _better _shows, he was mucking it up for them.

He ran his hand through his hair in frustration; he knew he would have to return to Edinburgh almost immediately. But he didn't want to. He wanted to stay here, in London. He wanted to stay with Jasper and Alice and, most importantly, Bella. He wanted to stay here forever and be with the woman he has feelings for. He didn't want to go back to Edinburgh.

He considered for a moment just sending them an email telling them to get stuffed but he knew he couldn't do that. Not only could he not do it to them or the band, he couldn't do it to himself. No matter how much he felt he didn't want to go back, he knew that he wanted to be back with his friends, back with the band. _But what about Bella?_ his mind screamed. He felt like screaming "I don't know!" at the top of his lungs but he didn't want to wake the others.

Eventually, he pulled himself together and decided to write an email to them. Today was Wednesday. He decided he would leave Friday night.

_Guys,_

_I get it. I'm sorry._

_I know I've been acting like an ass recently and now the band is suffering. _

_Don't worry; I'll leave Friday night and be back in Edinburgh by Saturday. _

_See you then._

_Edward._

He pressed send and shut down his laptop, suddenly very tired. He padded through to his room to see it was nearly 7:30. Collapsing on his bed, he stared up at the ceiling in frustration; he _really _didn't want to leave Bella but then again, he didn't want to leave the band either.

Sighing one last time, he rolled over and tried to get some sleep.

……………………………………………….

"Edward!" Alice sang through the door, waking him up with a start.

"What?" he asked groggily, running a hand through his undoubtedly messy hair.

"Wake up!" she laughed,

"Why?" he moaned like a child; he was just so damn tired from staying the lack of sleep the night before.

The next moment, Alice was in the room, opening the curtains and windows, much to Edward's disproval.

"I don't want to act like your mother, Edward, but if you won't get up then I'll have to." She teased, grinning mischievously.

"Why do I even have to get up?" he moaned groggily,

"Because, it's 1 o'clock in the afternoon and Bella's coming over soon."

Edward gasped. "_1 o'clock?" _

"Yup!" Alice laughed, popping the 'p'.

Edward sprung out of bed, "Why didn't you wake me earlier?" he asked, panicked. He was angry that he was wasting the last of his time here.

Alice shrugged, "I figured you needed the sleep after being up this morning,"

"Did I wake you?" Edward asked guiltily,

"No," Alice laughed, "You left all of your things on the table."

"Damn," Edward cursed as he tried to straighten up his bed.

"When's Bella coming over?" he asked, slightly flustered.

"Any minute now," Alice shrugged, grinning impishly as she floated out of the room.

Edward cursed loudly before he rushed to the bathroom to shower quickly. He hastily brushed his teeth and shaved before returning to his room to pull on some clothes.

When he heard Bella's laugh coming from the living room while he was trying to pull on some jeans, he nearly fell over. His hair was still damp and he had only a pair of jeans on but he ran into the living room, realising that he had left all of his stuff on the table.

Jasper, who had evidently returned from his business trip, was sitting on the sofa, laughing at something with Bella, who was standing by the table, and Alice.

As Edward ran into the room they all stopped laughing for a moment before they burst into what seemed to be subdued laughter. Edward rolled his eyes; he knew he must look pretty comical at that moment.

He strode over to the table and picked up his laptop and put it away, scanning the table for the notebook he was sure he had left on the table.

"Looking for this?" Alice giggled before holding his notebook up for him to see. His frown disappeared from his face and was replaced by a mix of anger and embarrassment.

"Y-yeah," he replied, utterly mortified at the thought of anyone, especially Bella, seeing what he had written.

Alice laughed before throwing it onto the table. Edward snatched it up, earning a laugh from Jasper and Alice, before he stormed off into his room. He could feel that he was blushing and flustered. He was so angry he wanted to shout at Alice but he was so embarrassed that he couldn't face going out there again.

He didn't know why it bothered him so much; people always knew what he wrote, obviously, in songs. _Why should this be any different? _he thought to himself. But even before he's finished asking the question, he knew why. It was because he had written something he would have never thought he could even think about another person and now the person he couldn't admit it to knew. He felt like a child again. He felt like he was 12 again and his older, popular crush had found out how he felt and the whole school would soon know about his ridiculous optimism.

He threw the notebook onto his bed and leaned against the wall, running his hand through his hair in frustration while trying to calm down.

"Don't be embarrassed," a small voice startled him, making him jump from the wall and swirl around to face Bella. She smiled a little at his surprise before coming into the room. "I liked it, and so did they." She told him, smiling reassuringly.

Although he didn't quite believe her, he calmed a little, happy to know that there was a possibility she wasn't freaked.

"Thanks," he croaked.

She laughed a little, "You know, I haven't seen you embarrassed in a long time, Edward Cullen."

He began to blush again and as soon as she noticed, she tried to reassure him again.

"Honestly, though, I really like it. I thought it was sweet." She grinned, taking his hand and squeezing.

He smiled back in appreciation, "Shame the others aren't as open minded."

She laughed, "I told you, they like it too! They just enjoy playing with your mind, that's all!"

Edward laughed uncomfortably.

"Have you written any music to go with the lyrics?" Bella asked, somewhat shyly.

He replied, sitting down on his bed. "How did you know it was a song?"

Bella shrugged, sitting down on his bed, smiling slightly "Well, you _are _a musician," she laughed.

He chuckled at the obviousness of the answer before moving back to her original question.

"I haven't got a guitar with me so I haven't written any actual music."

"Can I hear it? When it's finished, that is." she asked quietly after a short silence.

He blushed; he hadn't been expecting that.

He wanted to show her but he didn't. It was something he wanted to say, or sing, to her but he didn't know if he could, didn't know if he could write something truly worthy of that.

"It doesn't matter," Bella said quietly, sighing.

"No!" Edward said quickly, "I _will _play it to you." He said with conviction "But, only once it's completely finished."

She smiled happily at his uncertain face, "I'm sure it'll be amazing when it's finished,"

He smiled sheepishly before they both got up and decided to head into the kitchen where they could hear Alice and Jasper talking.

Bella launched straight into conversation once they were there while Edward remained in a nervous haze.

He was uncertain if he could write something good enough to play to Bella and all he could think was _'Oh, crap'._

**A little shorter than usual, I know. **

**Sorry!**

**Anyway, I hope you enjoyed that. :)**

**Review, Review, Review!**

**Preview of chapter 15 for all reviewers! :) **


	15. Chapter 15

**Yeah, I know, I'm an **_**awful **_**author. What has it been? About 3 months? Yeah. I suck.**

**I could list about a hundred different excuses for making you wait so long but they'd all be pretty rubbish and time wasting so I'm just going to leave you with a big, fat SORRY and the next chapter. **

"So, Edward, when's your next gig with the band?" Jasper asked over dinner.

"I'm not sure," he admitted "We'll have to practice together a bit before we sort anything out. When we don't play together for a while, it all gets a little out of sync."

"Don't they mind you taking all this time off, though?" Alice asked curiously before putting some broccoli in her mouth.

"Actually, they do," he confessed. The table went very quiet and everybody suddenly became very interested in the patterns on their plates. The silence was awkward and felt so… wrong and unusual.

"They want you to go home," Bella said grimly, her comment more a statement than a question.

He nodded dismally, "I have to leave Friday night," he looked over to Bella. She looked in his eyes for a moment before looking down at her food. He could see the disappointment that was in her eyes; something that both pleased and displeased him. He was pleased because it added to his confidence that she had at least some feelings for him, whether they were as strong as his for her or not. At the same time, he was displeased to see Bella with any emotion that was not happiness. He wanted her to be happy and contented, not sad and disappointed.

The table was set in another awkward silence momentarily before Jasper cleared his throat and said "We'll miss having you around, man"

Edward chuckled, "Are you seriously saying you aren't glad you're finally getting some peace with your girl?"

Alice and Bella giggled and Jasper smirked, "Well, I guess there are a few advantages to having the house to ourselves again," he laughed, making Edward and the girls laugh harder.

The rest of the dinner was full of jokes and laughter but it all felt wrong. Forced. No matter how much they laughed and joked, there was still an undertone of emotions trying to bring them all down. Disappointment. Sadness. Discontent. Regret. Wistfulness. Longing. For each one of them the emotions were different but it had the same effect on them all.

After they had finished eating, Alice and Jasper decided they would go down to the movie store to rent a film, leaving Bella and Edward to clean up. Bella decided she would clean the pots while Edward dried and together, they managed to get the job done and the pots in the cupboards quicker than usual.

"Will you be coming back?" Bella asked quietly as they cleared the table cloth and place mats from the table and began to fold them so they could be put away.

Edward was slightly taken aback; they'd been talking of trivial things up until then and he had assumed that they would completely avoid the subject of his departure. Apparently not.

"Do you want me to?" he asked her just as quietly as they folded the large tablecloth.

Bella looked down at the tablecloth, blushing in embarrassment before she looked back up to meet Edwards eyes and nodded, smiling hesitantly.

"Well, in that case, yes I will." He said, mirroring her smile.

Her smile grew bigger and more sure and she put the cloth down and pulled him into a hug, leaving Edward slightly overwhelmed.

He raised a questioning eyebrow at her as she let him go. She grinned and shrugged, "I'm glad," she laughed as he shook his head and chuckled, not even trying to hide his huge grin.

"Well, I'm glad you want me to come back because I didn't really want to come back uninvited." He chuckled.

"When you came here this time you were uninvited," she pointed out, laughing.

"Oh well," he shrugged as he took the tablecloth off of her and put it into the sideboard next to the table. "I don't want to do it again."

They smiled at each other some more before Bella skipped off to the kitchen to get the popcorn ready and Edward followed to give her a hand.

"I'm guessing it won't be for as long, though, next time?" Bella asked as she got one of the largest bowls Alice and Jasper had from the cupboard next to the sink and started pouring the un-cooked popcorn into it while Edward got four cans of pop from the fridge.

"Yeah, I won't be able to do that again," he sighed, opening the cans, "well, not if they still let me in the band." He added before he ran his hands through his hair in frustration.

"They will," Bella told him, smiling at him encouragingly.

"And how do you know that?" Edward asked her, half seriously, half sarcastically.

She shrugged, "If you were out of the band, they would have said it straight off instead of just telling you to get back. You just need to grovel when you get back and try not to piss them off for a while."

"For a _while_?" Edward chuckled.

"Okay, so maybe for the next ten years of your life," Bella laughed as she handed him the bowl to put in the microwave. She began to pour the cans into some glasses and when she didn't hear the microwave start, she turned around to see Edward staring at it intently, the bowl still in his hands.

She laughed and strode over, taking the bowl from his hands and pressing the 'Open' button by the side of the door. He smiled sheepishly at her as she raised an eyebrow and laughed before setting the microwave for 3 minutes and going back to pour the drinks.

"That was worrying, Edward," she laughed as he poured the last can for her. He raised an eyebrow. "You can't even use a microwave." She pointed out, "How do you survive? Don't Carlisle and Esme worry about your nutrition?"

Edward scowled and elbowed her in the ribs before he grabbed two of the drinks and took them through to the living room, just as Alice and Jasper came through the door, smiling happily and brandishing a bag of DVDs. Bella laughed at Alice's overjoyed expression before picking up the last two drinks and following Edward. She returned for the popcorn and put that in the middle of the coffee table.

"What's with all the DVDs?" Edward laughed as Alice tipped the pile onto the floor in front of their TV

"Yeah, I don't think we're going to be able to watch them all," Bella laughed as she saw the pile

Alice rolled her eyes, "Well, I know that!" she snapped, making them all laugh and earning Jasper some evils.

"Hey! They were laughing too!" he protested as she glared at him.

"Yes, but I expect it from them," she wailed, "I do _not _expect it from you!"

Bella bit her lip to hide a smile and she saw Edward turn away to disguise his. Jasper looked as if he might just burst with laughter but he managed to hold it together and pull Alice into a hug and apologise. Once she was appeased, she sat down next to the pile and began to explain.

"I didn't know what to choose so I took a load so we could all choose." She told them as she spread out the pile. "We have 'S. Darko', 'The Rocky Horror Show', 'Dude, where's my car?', 'Die another day' and 'The Omen'. Who wants what?"

They all shouted for their choice of movie and squabbled until they Alice shouted at them to shut up. It was half and half; Jasper and Bella wanted 'S. Darko' while Edward and Alice wanted 'Die another Day' put on. They were all holding stern until Bella managed to convince Edward otherwise and he caved; allowing them to put S. Darko on by way of vote.

"Come on, Edward!" Alice scolded him as they went to get some more cans of pop "it was only some hugs and a little persuasion; you could have held your ground!"

He chuckled, "Yes, I could have, but I didn't want to."

She frowned, "You wanted to watch it?"

"No," he laughed, "I just didn't want to deny Bella."

Alice rolled her eyes and hit his arm playfully, "Jeez, Edward!" she laughed, "Man up! She's got you wrapped around her finger!"

He laughed and shrugged earning yet another eye roll as they made their way back to the living room.

………………………………..

"So, you're leaving in two days, then?" Bella asked as she put her coat on and got ready to leave.

"Yeah. Tomorrow and Friday left." He said, trying to smile "I'll probably be packing on Friday afternoon, though," he said grimly,

"You hate packing, I'm guessing?" she asked, laughing softly when he nodded, looking sheepish. "Don't worry; me too."

He smiled before hugging her softly and saying goodbye. Alice came rushing through from the living room and grabbed Bella's arm just before the door swung shut, yanking her back through the doorway.

"Isabella Swan!" Alice shouted, mockingly, "You better hope that wasn't you just walking out of here without saying goodbye!"

Bella looked shocked for a moment and Edward laughed, turning to Bella and teasing her. "Tut, tut. What _were _you thinking Isabella?"

Bella rolled her eyes, "Grow up," she said, half smiling.

Unfortunately, Alice wasn't so amused. "I don't know what you're laughing at Edward, you're in trouble too! I'll be hiding the Xbox for that!" She scolded, turning on Edward and completely forgetting her annoying with Bella.

Now it was Bella's turn to laugh while Edward looked shocked and tried to splutter objections.

"What did I even do?" He wailed, like a child, making Bella laugh again. She stopped when he scowled at her.

Alice cracked a small smile, "Well, if Bella hadn't been so… distracted by you, she would've said goodbye." She grinned, showing how much she was enjoying threatening to take away the beloved Xbox.

"Come on, Alice," Edward reasoned, a little _too _desperately, Bella noticed, "Lets be reasonable; Bella leaving has got nothing to do with me! Please don't take the Xbox, _please!_"

Bella laughed out loud as he begged and Alice started giggling too, making Edward even more desperate.

"Please, Alice!" he moaned just like a 5 year old and grabbed Alice's arm, as if cutting off the circulation to her hand would make her re-think her decision.

"Relax, dork," Alice laughed as she shook off his grip from her arm, "I'm not taking away your darling Xbox, I just enjoy toying with you!"

Bella laughed as Edward scowled and walked away. She didn't think he realised how relieved he looked.

"Honestly," Alice laughed, "they're addicted to that thing! Threaten to take their baby away and they'll do anything!"

Bella and Alice had a quick chat before Jasper came through the hall, just as Bella was walking out the door for the second time.

"Hey, Bella!" Jasper called, grabbing her arm and pulling her back into the apartment again.

"Seriously, guys, I _do _have my own place!" Bella laughed, straightening her coat.

"Yeah, but I just made up the bed in the guest room so you're staying here tonight." Jasper shrugged, smiling.

"You _actually _made a bed up?" Alice teased, earning a sarcastic glare from Jasper.

"Did Edward tell you about the Xbox threat?" Bella asked, smiling knowingly at him.

He looked uncomfortable for a moment before shrugging and saying a hasty "What threat?" before walking away.

Bella laughed while Alice watched him go, smirking, "Edward told him!" she said as she turned to face Bella.

"Yeah," Bella agreed.

"So, you're staying, then." Alice said, pulling her all the way back through the door and trying to take her coat off of her.

"Alice, I don't know! Seriously, I spend more time here than my own place, I should probably go home at some point!"

Alice giggled, "yeah, you should. You're not going to, though!"

……………………………………………..

"Bella," Alice said as Bella was getting ready to leave, "I hope you're planning on coming back today. It _is _Edward's last full day here, after all. His last day of freedom. His last day before he goes back into the harsh world of work. His last day of…"

"Okay, Alice, I get it." Bella giggled, elbowing her in the side before she picked up her bag.

"Yeah, thanks for reminding me, Alice." Edward scowled mockingly.

Alice rolled her eyes while Bella and Edward shared a momentary grin.

"So, _are _you coming back?" Alice asked again.

Bella sighed, "I've got a shoot today."

Alice groaned and Edward cursed internally. "Can't you just skip it? Just this once?" Alice whined, pulling on Bella's arm like a child.

Bella laughed softly, "Alice, no, I can't; it's important."

"More important than Edward?" Alice continued, unleashing her puppy dog eyes on Bella. "More important than _me?" _

"Alice, I've been slacking so much lately, I really need to get back out there." Bella told her stubbornly, wishing that she could indeed stay with the others and have a fun day. Both Alice and Jasper had booked the next two days off work so they could spend it with Edward.

"No, you haven't." Alice argued miserably, "You went to a shoot last week!"

"That was for my portfolio," Bella sighed, "And anyway, this one is _really _important. If I miss it, I'll regret it. Besides, I _have _been slacking. I haven't been to the gym in nearly a week and all of this junk food you guys have been feeding me is taking its toll."

Edward snorted incredulously at this comment and Alice narrowed her eyes.

"Look, I really do need to sort this out. I'm sorry." Bella told them both sincerely. "I really am."

Edward pulled her into a hug. "Go to work, just promise to see me before I leave?"

She grinned, "You couldn't keep me away."

Alice rolled her eyes but her expression lightened it. She was grinning ear to ear, as if watching her child take its first steps.

"Erm, Alice?" Bella laughed once Edward had walked from the room, "What's with the creepy grin?"

Alice laughed, "Oh, silly Bella, I'm just _proud!"_

"Proud?" Bella giggled. "Of what? Me finally realising I need to get my butt back to the gym?"

Alice giggled at the joke but otherwise ignored the comment. "Go, get to the shoot. It finishes at 4, right? Edward and I'll be there." She started to push Bella out of the door while Bella laughed and protested.

"What? Why're you…?" Alice shut the door in Bella's face and she could hear the evil pixie laughing on the other side of the door. She laughed softly before turning down the hall and heading home. All the way home, she found it hard not to smile just thinking of the night before and all the recent nights like it. This wasn't the first time she'd had times like these with Alice; it was more than a regular occurrence for her to spend more time of her life in Alice's flat than her own. In fact, her mother had often joked about getting a change of address so all of her post went straight to Alice's. What was different now was that Edward was there. It was the best of both worlds; she got to spend time with Alice _and _Edward. She felt giddy just thinking about him.

She was undoubtedly disappointed about him leaving but he'd said he'd be back, right? She would see him again. And hopefully, he would show her that song she'd seen him writing. She was already excited about seeing him again and he hadn't even left yet.

Getting home, she changed into her workout clothes and hit the gym for an hour before showering there, changing into some clothes she had put in her bag and heading straight for the studio.

When she got there, the designer greeted her excitedly and talked about the line she would be modelling. It was a new line she was launching and the pictures would be going into the store catalogue. This was given away with every purchase to show the upcoming styles. Bella hoped it would produce some excellent material to put into her portfolio.

The style of clothing was leaning towards retro, with outfits for formal use and some for casual. It was similar to the clothing that Bella herself liked and she found herself falling in love with one dress in particular, a floaty, casual white dress with lilac flowers around the hem and climbing up the front. She could imagine herself wearing it on a lovely summer day and just the thought brightened her already joyful mood.

The next dress was a striking turquoise colour with a black lace over the colourful lining. It was strapless and form fitting in the bodice while it was slacker in the skirt of the dress. They got lots of group photos of all the models in similar dresses, each designed to suit people with different complexions and body types. After that, there were several quirky shirts for a more casual occasion and another floaty dress or two before they moved on to the formal section of the line.

"We're running out of time so we might have to book another meeting," the designer said to the photographer while Bella stood with a few of the other models that were modelling the other clothes. They were all being fussed over by the hair and makeup crews and the photographer was looking through some of the shots on his computer near by. At hearing this, Bella began to panic; she wanted to at least be able to spend tomorrow with Edward without having to work. Apparently, that was too much to ask

The last outfit was a plain black shirt that ended about mid-thigh teamed with a pair of loose fitting short shorts. There was ruffled and pulled material all up the front of the top and the cut was extremely low. It was form fitting and made Bella feel sexy at the same time as girly. Her makeup was dark and heavy. She had heavily rimmed eyes and dark, coal eyeshadow smeared across her lids as the designer had said this ensemble should be dominating and intimidating rather than sweet and natural. They got several of the best shots of the shoot in that outfit.

They got some group photos first before they told the models to relax for a brief break while the designer looked through the pictures to see if they were satisfied or not.

The studio door slammed and Bella heard some raised voices as she stood talking to Zara, making her jump. No sooner had she turned around that she knew what the problem was; a streak of jet black hair streaked across the studio, followed by some bronze while one of the receptionists trailed behind, waving and shouting frantically after them.

"Heather, what on _Earth_ is the problem?" The designer, Katrina Shaw, exclaimed as she looked up from the computer screen. "Who are they?" she asked as she eyed Edward and Alice.

Bella walked hesitantly up to Katrina, hoping that this wouldn't jeopardise the shoot.

"Erm…" she began, bringing Katrina attention to her, "Miss Shaw, these are my friends, Alice and Edward. I arranged to meet them after the shoot but I guess they got fed up or something. I'm sorry, I'm sure they didn't mean to be so disruptive."

Katrina gave her a disapproving look before waving a hand in her direction. "Make sure they don't make any more trouble."

Bella nodded, not sure whether them coming in here really was 'trouble' but not daring to argue. "Of course." she smiled apologetically at Katrina before marching over to where Edward and Alice stood, looking guilty but excited.

"Guys? What the hell? You said four! It's half 3!" She started hissing when she reached them.

Alice just laughed while Edward stayed quiet.

"Like you sad, we got fed up of waiting." Alice shrugged. "And we wanted to see you in action. Didn't we, Edward?"

Edward didn't answer. Bella turned her attention to him to see him looking at her with an intensity she'd rarely seen before.

"Edward?" Alice sang as Bella grew pink in embarrassment.

Alice rolled her eyes and nudged Edward forcefully but playfully, bringing him back into the real world. "Honestly, Edward, can you just stop ogling Bella for long enough to listen to me?"

It was Edward's turn to turn bright pink in embarrassment. "I-I wasn't…"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." Alice laughed, interrupting him. Bella and Edward both averted their gazes awkwardly. "Anyway, like I was saying. We wanted to see you in action. Didn't we, Edward?"

Edward nodded, forcing himself to meet Bella's eyes. She smiled back reassuringly, trying to get over the awkwardness of the moment.

They talked for a minute or two before Katrina called Bella back to the centre of the room in front of the backdrop where they'd been taking all the pictures that day.

"We'd like just a few more of this outfit with Zara and some of just you before we end the day. We'll meet again on Monday to carry on with the shoot; I'm too busy tomorrow."

Bella sighed in relief, happy that she wouldn't miss out on any time with Edward. She went to stand in with Zara and began to pose as they instructed. It wasn't until she heard Alice's playful wolf whistle that she began to feel awkward; she'd forgotten they were across the room.

It wasn't Alice that bothered her; Alice had seen her in much less than this before now but Edward hadn't. She hadn't even felt particularly exposed before but now… Not it was different. Edward was across the room and he had been looking at her in that way….

She shook her head and changed her pose so she leaned an arm on Zara's shoulder, jutting her leg out slightly.

"Lean back on the wall, Zara," the photographer, Chris, instructed. Zara did and Bella felt herself grow more awkward.

"You okay?" Zara whispered as they reloaded the film on the camera.

"Yeah," Bella replied, nervously shooting Edward a look who was watching her intently.

Zara followed her eyes and smiled, "This is because of him?"

Bella blushed slightly but nodded discretely. Zara laughed softly, earning a raised eyebrow from Bella.

"Don't worry; you look drop dead gorgeous." Zara smiled reassuringly.

Bella smiled back gratefully but didn't feel so relieved. Chris returned and told them to start posing again just as Zara leaned down and whispered into her ear.

"He thinks so too." She whispered. "I mean, look at the way he was _looking _at you."

Bella smiled slightly as she thought about that. She was right; he _was _staring at her. And it seemed like he _liked _what she had going on. Maybe? So getting nervous seemed silly. Right?

She shot Zara a grin as her fear evaporated.

"Fiercer, Bella. Remember, _severe!_" Chris prompted as he began to shoot pictures.

Bella straightened her back and stood up straighter, arranging her features in a fiercer way and holding herself with more confidence. She felt Zara put pressure on her back, as if to say "Way to go," and she bit back a smile as Chris zipped around them, trying to get the right shots as they posed.

When it was time for the single photos of Bella, Zara left to talk to Alice and Bella saw Edward watching her as he had been before. She smiled again before posing as Chris had told he to, adding in a little here and then as Chris shouted in approval as he snapped away with him camera. She made her look fiercer, not daring to look over at Edward and break her confidence or nerve. She would normally pose like this for this kind of effect but if she was being honest, she would have never tried to have an affect of anyone as much as she was trying to affect Edward.

When Chris finally wrapped it up and she glanced at Edward, she was glad to see that she _had _affected him as she had hoped and Zara had said. He was unashamedly staring at her, a slight smile playing on his lips as he appraised her. She smiled nervously at him before running back to the dressing room with Zara who was congratulating her on a job well done. Both on the shoot and with impressing Edward.

"Seriously, he couldn't look away!" she laughed as she handed back her clothes. Bella laughed giddily as she took off her makeup. Zara finished before her and went to talk to Alice while she hung up her clothes and handed them over.

Edward greeted her when she walked into the studio again. He was still wearing the same smile and she smiled when she saw him.

"hey," he said as she approached him.

"Hey," she grinned.

"You…" he started, smiling, "You looked great."

She laughed, "thanks."

"Did you have fun?" he asked, grinning wider.

"Yeah, sure." She mirrored his grin, sitting down on the floor, leaning on the wall. He joined her after a while.

They talked for a while, neither of them unable to stop smiling, while the photographers and stylists packed away. If Alice hadn't come bounding up to them and dragged them off to get food they probably would have stayed and talked until they were kicked out.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………**.**

**13 ½ pages. :) **

**Links to some of the clothes for the shoot:**

**You'll have to take out all the brackets and [dot]s. Links didn't work the last time I uploaded.**

http://www[dot]modcloth[dot]com/store/ModCloth/Womens/Dresses/Printed/Cornflower+Dress

http://www[dot]modcloth[dot]com/store/ModCloth/Womens/Dresses/Solid/Girls+Just+Wanna+Have+Fun+Dress

http://www[dot]modcloth[dot]com/store/ModCloth/Womens/Tops/Short+Sleeve+Shirts/Frill+Grace+Dress

**So when I started writing this, it was supposed to be a short fluffy thing, just a little supplement to keep you guys going while I work on my other story. Then, I thought "hey, its not fair that these guys are really patient with me and wait all this time for a dull old chapter" so I thought I'd make it longer and a little more fun.**

**Yeah, Edward's going BUT the sooner he's gone, he'll come back sooner! :)**

**Penny for your thoughts? What'd you think?**


	16. Authors Note

*Hides from angry readers*

OKAY, right…

**I'M SORRY.**

Believe it or not, I'm NOT dead - just lazy and currently out-of-love with this story.

It's been nearly a year, I know.

I feel bad. Honest, I do.

But I'm not going to lie, I won't be carrying on with this story; I don't have the time OR creativity to carry on. And that's a really awful excuse, I know.

But, I was thinking, if anyone thinks they can salvage this story – give it new life and get it to the finish line – then give me a message and I'd be more than happy to hand over. I'm sure you guys could do a much better job and would probably update like a _good _author would.

**THANKYOU** everyone who's read this far and put up with the long waits in between chapters when I've been too lazy to update. :)

If any of you want to check out my current project, an original fiction, just follow the link. It would be greatly appreciated and TBH I wouldn't deserve it after all this time.

Thank you again. AND I'M SORRY.

**WaterCoolerRomance **


End file.
